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Old 11-20-2018, 01:42 PM
 
Location: SoCal
20,160 posts, read 12,674,182 times
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@Ohio, I agree with part of your post regarding companionship and such. But what makes me barf is the wording finding true love at 60. Many people have trouble finding true love at much younger age, let alone at 60.
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Old 11-20-2018, 02:27 PM
 
Location: Lakewood OH
21,695 posts, read 28,332,881 times
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This is a very interesting thread. If I found love at this stage of my life that would probably make me happy but I am not unhappy now so it would just add to it. Does that count?

Four years ago, I was was becoming increasingly unhappy due to my living conditions so I did something about it. It worked for me and I became much more happy. There is always room for more happiness, of course. I would never rule out achieving more happiness but I don't think finding a partner would do that. I've been by myself for so long I am most happy that way regarding relationships.

Remember the play, "You're A Good Man Charlie Brown?" There's a song that goes "Happiness Is." The words go, "Happiness is different things to different people." I think that sums it up quite nicely.
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Old 11-20-2018, 02:51 PM
 
Location: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
11,936 posts, read 13,016,998 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by katharsis View Post

I am very fortunate that I have found both love and happiness, but I do realize that MANY people are not so fortunate and might never be.

)
Ditto and I thank the big guy upstairs every single day.
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Old 11-20-2018, 04:49 PM
 
Location: NC Piedmont
4,023 posts, read 3,782,351 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xsthomas View Post
If you're 60 or close to it, if you havent found happiness, you probably never will. Most at this age have lost loves and finances, some several times. You'll find out the material things mean absolutely nothing, they can come and go. Its the little things that can make you happy. You just have to find out what they are. You'll only as sad or as vulnerable as you let yourself be.
Another 2nd person one telling me how I tick.
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Old 11-20-2018, 05:57 PM
 
Location: Lakewood OH
21,695 posts, read 28,332,881 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xsthomas View Post
If you're 60 or close to it, if you havent found happiness, you probably never will. Most at this age have lost loves and finances, some several times. You'll find out the material things mean absolutely nothing, they can come and go. Its the little things that can make you happy. You just have to find out what they are. You'll only as sad or as vulnerable as you let yourself be.
I so disagree. A person can find happiness at any age. This sounds like “pop philosophy†that certainly won’t apply to everyone. Who decrees at what age one should give up on happiness in whatever form? The happiness cops?

Material things aren’t so bad. Especially when they are something one has longed for and worked hard for and finally be are able to obtain.

Little things can make you happy, true, but they can aggravate the He$$ out of you too. And hey, sometimes a pint of ice cream or any food of choice with a pity party for oneself for an evening isn’t such a bad thing if it helps to get over the blues.

No one has a sell buy date. If anybody wants to continue looking for happiness they shouldn’t stop because of age. Who knows? Maybe they’re a very late bloomer.
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Old 11-20-2018, 06:57 PM
 
3,633 posts, read 6,143,957 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
Did y'all ever give up on finding happiness?

I have a couple of female friends that are having relationship issues. Issues that will keep me on the phone with them for hours!

We are almost 60 years old. I myself do not think you need a member of the opposite sex to be happy, but that is their main goal. But then they have had really bad relationships and just hung in there with them for years. My two marriages lasted not even 4 years altogether.
It's a shame women that age would still think that if only they could find Mr. Right or Prince Charming, then they'd be happy, especially in light of their bad experiences, which should have taught them better.

The goal should be to become a happy person in your own right. Then, if you want, add a relationship that enhances that happiness. But it should not be the basis for it.

And I have several friends who have entered into successful relationships at a more advanced age - fully formed, happy men and women who had something to offer another besides needing security.
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Old 11-20-2018, 07:13 PM
 
12,050 posts, read 10,192,862 times
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Originally Posted by ukiyo-e View Post
It's a shame women that age would still think that if only they could find Mr. Right or Prince Charming, then they'd be happy, especially in light of their bad experiences, which should have taught them better.

The goal should be to become a happy person in your own right. Then, if you want, add a relationship that enhances that happiness. But it should not be the basis for it.

And I have several friends who have entered into successful relationships at a more advanced age - fully formed, happy men and women who had something to offer another besides needing security.
I sort of agree but then I think of their backgrounds

Some dysfunctionality there, but aren't we all - thus my conflict.

They just stuck around too long with their bad husbands. But then, what would they say? Three sides to every story.

And yes, sounds like jr high - some of the things they tell me.
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Old 11-20-2018, 07:19 PM
 
3,633 posts, read 6,143,957 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clemencia53 View Post
I sort of agree but then I think of their backgrounds

Some dysfunctionality there, but aren't we all - thus my conflict.

They just stuck around too long with their bad husbands. But then, what would they say? Three sides to every story.

And yes, sounds like jr high - some of the things they tell me.
Well, of course, I don't know them, and you do. Sorry if I sounded harsh. But it would be nice if they could "make" happiness instead of "looking for" it.
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Old 11-20-2018, 07:41 PM
 
12,050 posts, read 10,192,862 times
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Originally Posted by ukiyo-e View Post
Well, of course, I don't know them, and you do. Sorry if I sounded harsh. But it would be nice if they could "make" happiness instead of "looking for" it.
Me too. For now I am just listening to them vent.
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Old 11-20-2018, 08:02 PM
 
Location: TN/NC
34,851 posts, read 30,941,798 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newcomputer View Post
yet


and I hope your current "girlfriend" doesn't read this
Do I hate my life? No. Do I like her, love her even? Yes. You can love someone without necessarily wanting to tear their clothes off. She has medical issues that make the physical aspect difficult, but I wouldn't put up with all I do if I didn't care for her. Heaven knows I get nothing out of it.
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