Of death and dying it seems all around me. Depressing! (retired, cousin)
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My husband surprised everyone at work and retired the moment he qualified, and I am sooo glad he did. We had 10 great years of excellent health and enjoying active retirement. Started slowing down when he was 72 or so, but not too bad until a heart attack at 74. That started the gradual mental and physical decline, so now at age 80 he is "old".
I read here on CD of so many delaying retirement until 68 or 70. If we had done that, we would have missed out on the best part of our retirement. Many friends & acquaintances died between 68-75, and a FEW have been more fortunate and are still quite active at 80.
I feel your pain, OP. I've been to too many funerals the last few years and it seems like most were people younger than me. That is exactly the reason I'm retiring in January at age 63.
My boss' father used to say "Life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer you get to the end, the faster it goes". When I hit 50 I realized that I've already lived more than half my life and it was a sobering thought.
In the last 9 years I have lost my father, stepfather, husband and this past June my mother. When I spoke to my mother's aunt, who is 92, she was telling me how she is the only one left out of all her brothers and sisters (there were 9 of them). She lost her only child from cancer when she was only 40 and her husband died a few years ago. I'm now the oldest of our family members at 64. It can be a depressing thought.
I think 70 for most people is around the cut-off point where things can get dicey. Sure, there are a lot of healthy 70 year olds, but most people go downhill a good bit between 70 and 80. A lot of people begin to downhill in their 60s.
I’m 57 and like you, went breezing through life never really experiencing loss, other than dogs. Then it started with my mom 2 years ago and 3 more have gone since then. No doubt my dad, 2 older dogs and a friend with copd won’t be long.
I went through my 20's to my 60's without losing a long time friend but lately something is happening and it is worrisome. Lost my oldest and longest friend three years ago one day before his 70th birthday. Far to young to die of a sudden, unexpected heart attack..
I want to go before my wife because I don't know how I would handle the sadness but then for me to say that seems selfish of me. She went to the paint store today and selected some colors for the condo, what would I do without her?
Sorry for the childish rant but the idea of borrowed time just sort of hit me.
Well, we are supposed to think about this when we study religion and philosophy earlier in life - or when we take drugs (are you experienced?)....etc.....
But you are 100% correct. Knowing it conceptually and knowing it in reality are two different things.
Here is my attitude...in general. In my mid-50's I told my wife "you know, if I die now I have accomplished everything I needed and wanted to". Now it's a decade later. We are both quite healthy but there is no thought of "doing this or doing that", probably because we put more importance on simplicity and nature (which is local - you don't have to spend 100's of gallons of jet fuel to get to nature).....
One reason suicides are so high among the aged is that there is no "death with dignity" in most of the USA. Those who are serious about such things can still go to Switzerland or the like. Few Do.
I think each person does...or does not...get to a point where life is not worth living any longer. Often the end comes soon enough after that (maybe weeks or months). Sometimes it is many years of suffering for both the caregiver and the caretaker.
I think 70 for most people is around the cut-off point where things can get dicey. Sure, there are a lot of healthy 70 year olds, but most people go downhill a good bit between 70 and 80. A lot of people begin to downhill in their 60s.
My mom was doing well until she hit 80. Then she was diagnosed with amyloidosis which is what eventually killed her. The doctors gave her two years when she was diagnosed but she lived four years. Unfortunately the disease sapped her strength and she had to get transfusions regularly but she still lived alone until that last week. Most of my family died between 75-80 except my paternal grandfather who made it to just shy of his 97th birthday. He had dementia the last few years however but lived alone till he was around 92.
It's kind of a crap shoot when to take retirement; you want to have some years left to enjoy retirement but you also want to get as much Social Security as possible. Serious Conversation - I'm glad you had those years with your husband to enjoy life before he became ill.
Serious Conversation had a husband? That’s something he has been hiding well from this forum.
Where did you read this?
He has talked about his girlfriend in many of his posts.
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