Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
After, say, 50, or in retirement, does it make sense to consider yourself and others winners or losers in life?
Question bothers me.
What is a loser, anyway? Someone who has never done anything much?
Drug addict? Or someone, like myself, who has not achieved their life goals and expectations
Such as marriage, or admirable LTR, career job satisfaction? I have not achieved that, having failed to get really good well paying jobs--- and love. Only lost love.
Some say loners and weirdos are losers (unfairly) and some
say if you lost all your money, bankrupt. Not to mention criminal types.
What makes you a winner? Big success, nice family?
This is bound and determined by culture because western values differ from the poorest nations.
Does happiness make you a winner? What you think?
In my opinion, ALL older folks are "winners".
Our retirement will not be all rosy, but I've had serious chronic medical issues for most of my life, and at one point it bankrupted me, leaving me to be homeless, literally living under a bridge next to the RR tracks.
But I pulled myself up by my bootstraps and now, 20 years later I own a home, half paid for in just 4 years.
I also found a soul mate, but that didn't happen until I was 37. 20 years later it's sometimes a struggle, but all relationships are at one point or another.
In my opinion, ALL older people are WINNERS simply because they have survived ( good or lousy) this thing we call LIFE.
Even those who appear to have"everything", I'm sure have struggled somewhere along the way.
Even the old phrase "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger" applies.
Wisdom is accumulated from experience, and older folks have had a lifetime of experience, even if it did not all turn out "so well".
Yes, all life is a struggle to survive day to day. ALL must be fought for!!
Some struggle more than others, but even those for whom all appears well have had a struggle, even if it's only deciding what to have for dinner, or what to do about a certain situation.
So, we are ALL WINNERS at the game of Life!
And death is the greatest equalizer, as NONE of us will escape it's clutches.
After 70 most of us are winners because we are still alive but losers in other ways. Lost eyesight, lost hearing, lost hair, lost sleep, lost health, lost relationships, lost energy, lost interests, lost patience, etc. It doesn't matter whether you are a millionaire or a homeless person, whether you live in Beverly Hills or a hut in the Amazon, age is the great leveler. No one is a total winner or total loser.
Happiness comes and goes. It's much more about the way you think about things than what your circumstances are. It's an emotion of the moment, not a permanent destination. Family comes and goes. The older you get, the less relevant you are to your childrens' and grandchildrens' lives. Family members die off, likely your parents, aunts and uncles and some cousins or siblings will be dead. Old age isn't for the faint hearted. You have to make the best of whatever cards you are dealt. You have no other choice.
Quote:
Originally Posted by carnelian
After, say, 50, or in retirement, does it make sense to consider yourself and others winners or losers in life?
Question bothers me.
What is a loser, anyway? Someone who has never done anything much?
Drug addict? Or someone, like myself, who has not achieved their life goals and expectations
Such as marriage, or admirable LTR, career job satisfaction? I have not achieved that, having failed to get really good well paying jobs--- and love. Only lost love.
Some say loners and weirdos are losers (unfairly) and some
say if you lost all your money, bankrupt. Not to mention criminal types.
What makes you a winner? Big success, nice family?
This is bound and determined by culture because western values differ from the poorest nations.
I was born with US passport [20:1] white with secure family upbringing [40:1] with good longevity genes [160:1] and 99%ile IQ [16,000:1]. Avoided jail and substance abuse and careless accidents [32,000:1] and have been happy all my 80 years and still am [100,000:1], and have traveled the world and loved wonderful mates and enjoyed my work [1,000,000:1], I would be pretty ungracious to whine that I was not a winner.
I have! -- "Jesus said: “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. ..." (John 11:25-26)
He also had something to say about gaining and losing:
"What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?" (Matt. 16:26)
For my money, we're not here for any purpose but we ARE here so make the most of it. The only thing that makes us morally good or bad is what the laws say are legal and illegal. Live your lives this side of the law. Only you legitimize your life. Jesus won't do a damn thing for you except make you a loser with all the baggage he'll pile on you. Make a lot of money. Live comfortably because you'll get old and decrepit before you know it and after 70 it's all downhill. That's when we all turn into losers because old age is eating away our bodies faster and faster. The real losers will end up bedridden for years because their bodies will refuse to quit on life and just drag them through ever-increasing intense degradation, pain and dependence on others to clean their bedpans. It's a horrible life when you're old. It's a great life when you're young.
For my money, we're not here for any purpose but we ARE here so make the most of it. The only thing that makes us morally good or bad is what the laws say are legal and illegal. Live your lives this side of the law. Only you legitimize your life. Jesus won't do a damn thing for you except make you a loser with all the baggage he'll pile on you. Make a lot of money. Live comfortably because you'll get old and decrepit before you know it and after 70 it's all downhill. That's when we all turn into losers because old age is eating away our bodies faster and faster. The real losers will end up bedridden for years because their bodies will refuse to quit on life and just drag them through ever-increasing intense degradation, pain and dependence on others to clean their bedpans. It's a horrible life when you're old. It's a great life when you're young.
It's sad that you characterize your life and entire existence in such dismal terms. The Christians I've known over my 70+ years do not share your cynicism. I guess that makes it a bit easier to understand why you spend so much time 'hacking' at Christians on the Christianity forum. - We choose our own lives and for many of us, Life is Good!
This discussion reflects a mindset of looking in the rear view mirror of where you have been and not where you are going. Many prefer to look ahead at the possibilities of creating a future Bada Bing life. Not what you have been but what you will do and be!
I disagree on several counts.
Morality and the law are not the same. In Nazi Germany, everything done was legal. In the US South the Jim Crow laws were legal. What is legal and not often depends more on money and power than morality. The ten commandments are much more closely aligned to morality than the law. To me the golden rule may be the only thing you need to know what is moral for yourself. If you have a conscience, use it.
Religion and morality are not necessarily the same either. Most churches are money making businesses. That's not to say the actual beliefs don't have merit, they just don't follow the beliefs that they teach. It's like my father used to say half in jest, "what's your's is mine, and what's mine, you keep your damned hands off".
Not every old person is bedridden and decrepit. Even if they are, what counts is their frame of mind and attitude. Lots of old people accept their physical deterioration and still live the best lives they can. At any stage in life you can see the glass as half full or half empty, you can be grateful for what you have and had or be miserable because of what you didn't or don't. Like Shakespeare said, nothing is good or bad except that thinking makes it so.
Quote:
Originally Posted by thrillobyte
For my money, we're not here for any purpose but we ARE here so make the most of it. The only thing that makes us morally good or bad is what the laws say are legal and illegal. Live your lives this side of the law. Only you legitimize your life. Jesus won't do a damn thing for you except make you a loser with all the baggage he'll pile on you. Make a lot of money. Live comfortably because you'll get old and decrepit before you know it and after 70 it's all downhill. That's when we all turn into losers because old age is eating away our bodies faster and faster. The real losers will end up bedridden for years because their bodies will refuse to quit on life and just drag them through ever-increasing intense degradation, pain and dependence on others to clean their bedpans. It's a horrible life when you're old. It's a great life when you're young.
It's sad that you characterize your life and entire existence in such dismal terms. The Christians I've known over my 70+ years do not share your cynicism. I guess that makes it a bit easier to understand why you spend so much time 'hacking' at Christians on the Christianity forum. - We choose our own lives and for many of us, Life is Good!
Horton, I have been saying of late, "If believing in Jesus makes your life more tolerable and gives you some sort of hope that helps you get through the miseries in life we all confront in our old age, then go for it!" Jesus is one of the best panaceas I know of. But in the spirit of the thread which is "Are older people winners or losers" my decided opinion is that religion, especially Christianity with its quixotic maze of laws make oldsters losers and should be jettisoned by older people who don't need what's left of their lives complicated any more than they already are. But hey--if Jesus floats your boat go for it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
