Question to Female Baby Boomers (supplement, autism, teenagers, years)

[Maddie104]

Originally Posted by jean_ji

Why would they have expected anyone to go to college? Their grandparents, parents and themselves had not gone to college. They were in the midst of the manufacturing boom where a decent paying job could be had without a degree at that time. Having money to send kids to college or knowing a child could work and do it with possible financial was not their reality at that time. My parents weren’t opposed to me going to college, they had no experience of it to guide or help me. All of my parent’s grandkids have graduated from four year colleges now, even though I was the only one out of four to go to college and we all had children. It was a different time and economy.

My experience was my parents, particularly my father, did not see the utility of it. Since 25% of my graduating class and my best friend was going to college, I didn't see any reason I shouldn't go to college.
From his point of view, women who went to college at that point in time, went to find a husband and ended up being a SAHM.
Given that most of these women majored social services, worked for a few years and became SAHM, it was an accurate assessment for the times. The marrying age at the time was about 20 years of age.

Many job opportunities were closed to women. Sandra Day O'Connor had difficulty finding a paying job as an attorney even though she graduated Stanford Law School and served on Stanford Law Review. Since this was the reality of the times, it made little economic sense.

My parent's did not stress marriage but the practicality of getting a job with a "good" company as soon as I graduated high school. Ironically, this company fully paid for my college degree and I went on to have a well paid, successful career. Because I enjoyed my career, I put off having children until my 30's.

A significant piece of legislation, Title IX, prohibited discrimination in financial assistance, providing a financial gateway to women via sports participation, thus removing a financial barrier for many blue collar families.

Title IX of the Education Amendments Act of 1972 is a federal law that states: "No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity receiving Federal financial assistance."

Of course, Title VII was also a game changer but it took many years subsequent to its passage for women to see any real changes in the workplace.

[KaraZetterberg153]

People have probably heard too much from me on this thread already, but I have one more thing to add. I have an adult piano student my age and we have in common that both of our fathers were WWII vets, and both sexist.

I don't imagine this is unusual, but it is very hard when the male person you love, first, and above all others, is sexist. Dad was good to my mother, loyal, and clearly loved her until the day he died, but inconsistent. He referred to women as "split-tails" and never accepted women as equals. He hated Oprah, of all things.

[mlb]

I grew up in a major Big 10 University town.... but my parents never went to college. Mom was from a farm family..... dad from a small business family.

I do think there was an awful lot of “what can you do with a liberal arts degree” questioning by my parents..... and for that matter myself. I did attempt college but again - had to pay for it myself and work won out when the money ran out.

But the question remains today - college is important in more ways than simply securing employment... but if you come out with soaring debt and no job....that’s a problem.

[Bungalove]

I was born in 1950 and never contemplated anything but going to college and having a career. I was AP all the way through senior high, so it seemed a natural choice. Neither of my parents went to college but they encouraged me to do so; however, they also told me they didn't have any money for it. I started out in the teacher's program because it paid my tuition but changed my major to sociology at age 19, whereupon I had to become legally emancipated in order to pay back my enormous $200 tuition debt, as my parents couldn't. I also moved out of the house at age 19 and worked full-time at night and went to class during the day. Later I switched to night classes and switched my major again to business, taking 67 credits in 3 years.

I'm hugely grateful for the extremely varied career that I had, working for a major cosmetics company, a big tobacco company, a bank, local government, and all the different positions within the Federal government. Since I didn't have kids, I could take on jobs that involved lots of travel and continuing education in specific fields. Although my Dad died when I was 32, just before I started working for the Navy, my Mom was really proud of my career and was always thrilled when I would show her pictures from my trips. She always told me I was the smartest of her 3 kids; that's why she waited so late to have me, lol.

[athena53]

Originally Posted by Maddie104

From his [father's] point of view, women who went to college at that point in time, went to find a husband and ended up being a SAHM.

Given that most of these women majored social services, worked for a few years and became SAHM, it was an accurate assessment for the times. The marrying age at the time was about 20 years of age.

Many job opportunities were closed to women. Sandra Day O'Connor had difficulty finding a paying job as an attorney even though she graduated Stanford Law School and served on Stanford Law Review. Since this was the reality of the times, it made little economic sense.

I remember those attitudes well. Women weren't sent to college to train for a good career because the high-power jobs weren't open to them what was the point when they were going to quit after they had kids, anyway? One coworker remembered being told at one company that they didn't hire women for entry-level actuarial positions because they'd quit when they had kids. A young guy on a management track in another job (early 1980s) said HR had told him they wouldn't hire women for that management track- same reasoning.

[PNW-type-gal]

Stayed at home until the kids were in grade school, which caused quite a bit of strict budgeting. Then spent the next 25 years caught in university, raising kids, trying to work, caring for an increasingly ill father, trying to be a supportive spouse to someone with a very demanding job. Not sure how well I achieved any of those things, but I do know my work life suffered - and when I was finally clear of some of those other responsibilities, I was too old to find a career-level job (or so the hiring firms seemed to think) and ended up working part-time as a contractor for the state and various engineering firms.

Let us just say that my lifetime earnings are less than impressive and, when I am 65 or so, I will appreciate the spousal social security, as the check I earned will be equally less than impressive.

[AguaDulce]

My mother was born in '46 and I was born in '64.

We're both boomers, but we are VERY different.

She had 4 kids by the time she was 23 and got married eight times. She was a SAHM for only the first few years. Then she got her GED and learned how to be a secretary.

I never had kids. I have worked full-time since 1983, though I didn't finish college. I am in college now, though.

[Mightyqueen801]

I worked in the engineering industry for 40 years, although I am not an engineer myself (did consider it at one point when I returned to night school for a time thinking I might get a degree, but with an inability to grasp algebra, that wasn't going to happen.)

When I started in 1979, there were very few female engineers working for my public agency, and none of them were in the construction division, where I worked in a field office. We finally got a woman trainee who chose construction, and she kind of blew the image, pun intended, when something happened on the bridge construction job she was supposed to be monitoring overnight and the police searched for her and found her performing oral sex on the contractor under the bridge. She set things back for a while with that. She later married another engineer and left to become a SAHM.

But things did change. More and more young women came in as engineering trainees, and now those young women are only a few years younger than I am and are in positions of authority in the public and private sectors, overseeing major projects.

They are still underrepresented. In retirement, I work part-time attending engineering industry events for a private firm, and there is never a line for the ladies room. I think that will continue to change, however, as young women are encouraged to study STEM subjects.

Last year I attended a scholarship awards dinner given by an alumni association from the engineering school in Karachi, and I saw women in hijabs, civil engineers, speaking and imploring those present to encourage their daughters to study math and physics and become engineers. It was heart-warming in many ways.

[soulsurv]

Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801

Good thread idea, OP. Some great stories told here.

Thanks, Mightyqueen801. It's something I've often wondered about. I must admit to being jealous of SAHMs, not just because of struggling to pay bills by myself, but because I so badly wanted children, who, as I mentioned in an earlier thread, I "substituted" with many & multiple canines over the years. The tough part was - and still is - loosing them every 10 or so years. THANKS AGAIN!

[JOinGA]

All 4 children in our family, boys and girls, were raised with the expectation of college. I already had a master's degree when I got married. I was out of the workforce for 10 years after my daughter was born. I attribute my ability to provide a good life for her after the divorce to getting an education before I had a child. However, I paid a financial price for it with lowered career advancement and social security earnings, plus a deadbeat ex who did not pay child support. There were definitely tradeoffs, though I do not regret my time spent as a full-time at-home mom.