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Old 02-25-2021, 03:26 PM
 
Location: NYC & Media PA
519 posts, read 354,606 times
Reputation: 389

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So we have upwards of $200,000 in equity in our house, the house is in a desirable school district that we will never use. My wife loves the house but I hate the high taxes (10 grand) and upkeep, we still owe $260,000 on mortgage as well.

I really want to push to sell house and buy smaller condo outright and enjoy no mortgage but I dont want to disappoint my wife.

Anyone go through similar
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Old 02-25-2021, 03:33 PM
 
7,457 posts, read 14,799,563 times
Reputation: 12485
I live alone (spouse passed away) am in my mid 70's and own a 2200 sq ft ranch on 3.5 acres. We retired early and traveled and completed our bucket lists but before that lived in a 2600 sq ft townhouse, with HOA. NEVER AGAIN! The rules and regulations! Curtains had to be white on outside, no flower boxes, no vehicles other than car, etc. If you can live in a condo and deal with all the rules, go at it. Unlike you I do not have a mortgage so it might be financially better for you to move.
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Old 02-25-2021, 04:16 PM
 
Location: Central Florida
2,856 posts, read 3,996,472 times
Reputation: 12500
Quote:
Originally Posted by lpranger467 View Post
So we have upwards of $200,000 in equity in our house, the house is in a desirable school district that we will never use. My wife loves the house but I hate the high taxes (10 grand) and upkeep, we still owe $260,000 on mortgage as well.

I really want to push to sell house and buy smaller condo outright and enjoy no mortgage but I dont want to disappoint my wife.

Anyone go through similar
Seems to me this is between you and your wife. I'm not sure how internet strangers can help you.
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Old 02-25-2021, 04:47 PM
 
Location: Omaha, Nebraska
9,583 posts, read 6,108,514 times
Reputation: 25278
Would you wife be open to a compromise? A smaller, less expensive house in a less-fancy school district, with lower property taxes?
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Old 02-25-2021, 05:04 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ and Redwood City, CA
12,949 posts, read 8,831,086 times
Reputation: 46372
Quote:
Originally Posted by lpranger467 View Post
So we have upwards of $200,000 in equity in our house, the house is in a desirable school district that we will never use. My wife loves the house but I hate the high taxes (10 grand) and upkeep, we still owe $260,000 on mortgage as well.

I really want to push to sell house and buy smaller condo outright and enjoy no mortgage but I dont want to disappoint my wife.

Anyone go through similar

Are you two already retired? If not, what are your ages?
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Old 02-25-2021, 05:12 PM
 
5,984 posts, read 4,081,055 times
Reputation: 15094
Ipranger,

This is really between you and spouse.

Perhaps seeking counseling can help?

Or, sit down with a piece of paper, divided in half top to bottom.
Left side is your wife's side for pros to keep house, right side is yours for your pros to a smaller place.
For each item either of you list, you must back It up with a POSITIVE " argument".
Leave financial off this sheet.
This is just pros for each type of property.

Next do same with the financial side, with a tally total of $$spent to maintain each type of property in terms of total outlay.
Once spouse sees that, for example without you and your income side, spouse may not be able to afford it.

Then, perhaps a third sheet of ideas for THE BEST from both sheets.
As noted above, how about a smaller ranch, in a different school district (since you never use it) that's cheaper to pay for and maintain fir you, but gives her what she wants.

As noted by the experienced poster above...condos come with rules and regs. Go by yourself to check one out and ask for a copy... Then decide if you, or you and spouse can really live with said rules and regulations.
If it says "every Saturday the condo must be painted yellow fir Sunday, then painted back to original color on Monday done without scaffolding, but while standing on the recycling bin"...YOU might change your mind!

That's the best way I can think of.

A key to what you said is: I don't want to disappoint my spouse. Speak those words repeatedly as you outline the sheets above.
That may register with spouse, who might then not want to disappoint you, and each putting the others wants/needs/desires ahead of their own, a good compromise on the third sheet will arise.

One final straw might be: make spouse now the lawn for a summer, paint the trim, etc. Spouse may get the idea the maintenance IS hard work fir you, if your complaint is not just financial maintenance.

A counselor can mediate between the three sheets and a good compromise may arise if you two can't.
If

Best to you both...

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Old 02-25-2021, 05:18 PM
 
Location: Pennsylvania/Maine
2,383 posts, read 1,386,737 times
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How about a smaller home, lower taxes? I'm all for staying in a home you love but $10k taxes a year would put me in the poor house.
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Old 02-25-2021, 05:28 PM
 
Location: Coastal Georgia
43,171 posts, read 53,826,016 times
Reputation: 76103
If your property taxes are expensive because of the school system, why continue to pay for something you do not use? If you have rooms you dont set foot in for weeks at a time, why pay taxes on them?

Your wife might have a sentimental attachment, but if you give her the task of finding something more suitable, maybe she will get excited about the idea.
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Old 02-25-2021, 05:37 PM
 
Location: NYC & Media PA
519 posts, read 354,606 times
Reputation: 389
Were both in our early 50s, I'm drawing a pension but started a second full time career because its so expensive where we live. I suppose my main question (maybe should have worded it better) is are there others out there who sold their houses and really regretted it, or were you overall happy you did ?. My pension is about $5000 a month and 2500 of that is house payment so I'm basically mandated to work if I want any free cash for vacations and such.
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Old 02-25-2021, 05:37 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
19,410 posts, read 21,647,106 times
Reputation: 50500
My late husband and I lived in three bedroom condos (each with a full basement) for 35 years. They were perfect for a growing family and later for when family (including grandchildren visit). I am now widowed and live in a two bedroom apartment. While it can be a little crowded when my adult children and grandchildren visit that is only one to three weeks a year, as they live far away.

OTOH, when my brother built his new house, he made sure that he could fit a dining room table, with all the leaves, that could sit 22 people at the same time. His adult children and grandchildren live close and frequently visit. His cement driveway fits nine extra cars (and there is also space on the grass in another area. But, his new house only has one guest room because his kids and grandkids live so close that they never have to stay overnight.

Everyone is different. You need to do what is best for you and your family. Good Luck.
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