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I told my mother that I wanted the home. It's in a rural market and not all that expensive. I promised to pay my sister half the value. My sister was fine with it as she didn't want the home but was surprised I did. She asked if I planned on moving there and I said I'd visit once in awhile (I live 2000 miles away) but now we will have the perfect place for all of the stuff.
Really I like the stuff....there and all together. For example, I would never can vegetables here, but there she has everything one could possibly want for it, and places to get fresh produce. Here it would simply get in the way. There's a very real chance that the stuff will become just that when the home is empty....but I'll make that call then. For right now, it's perfectly placed. Unless Mom doesn't want it. It's her stuff after all. No need to hang onto it on my account.
Have you looked into insuring it? Before we were married my wife and I each had a house. When we married we decided to live in "her" place and sell "mine." State Farm told us they wouldn't renew on "my" place if nobody would be staying there. I suppose they're concerned that vandals might break in...or a fire might start and nobody would be there to know it...or thieves would target it.
My Grandma had Hummels. Not interested. Fortunately most were sold in 1988 when my grandmother will died. Will keep the Hummel nativity set for Christmas. I am keeping some of the small stuff. My great grandfather's shaving cup... THAT I will keep and treasure. It also takes very little room.
I had saved my 80s and 90s earrings and other costume jewelry in a tackle box. I don't know why - my gosh, I'm never going to wear most of that stuff again.
When my 18 year old granddaughter found it, she was ecstatic! I just gave her the whole tackle box - I hadn't opened it in years. And she has been wearing some of that 80s jewelry!
The upcoming generation IS different than those in their 20s.
I won a sweatshirt at work with a big logo. Im carrying it in after work. Its MY XL size. "DAD! I WANT THAT!" She is a mens small at best. Its actually flattering and annoying as heck. At the track meet yesterday many of the girls were wearing dad sized flannels. Where do I look when I cant find my flannel shirts in the winter? Yep, my 15 year old daughter's room.
I felt kinda bad for my sister who took the time to dutifully photographed everything in our parents' house to see if any relatives wanted their ancient 50 y/o stuff. We have a huge extended family and NO one wanted a single thing. One niece took a spinning wheel to start a new hobby, is all.
Salvation Army would barely take any of it. I say this because maybe it isn't worth all the time and effort a dutiful son/daughter might spend on it.
We had no interest in our parents' stuff, but we're not very sentimental. Same way I feel about ashes or graves. Seems like people are getting less sentimental, as a general trend?
I kept a few things that were of sentimental value to me. That doesn't mean the item has any intrinsic monetary worth.
If there's nothing else I've learned from thrift stores, flea markets, estate sales, and cleaning out parents'/grandparents' houses... it's that I won't buy Christmas decorations, decorative knick-knacks, etc. For the most part, if it isn't practical-- I can't wear it, eat it, use for something, etc., I'm not buying it.
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Originally Posted by lpc123
The trick is to list locally on NextDoor and Craigslist, and prepare to keep discounting until you get interest. It may have to get near zero, but someone will come take it away.
We just sold a solid wood table with six chairs that had stone inlay for $70...but it's no longer in our garage.
"0" is about it. I've found that people will take anything that's free, but they're not going to pay for it (I and others have found that out in the past).
The problem is when you have a living parent who wants you to take all this stuff because "it should stay in the family" or simply because they are going to feel bad to see you treating their possessions that meant something to them like nothing but junk.
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Originally Posted by Riley.
Do you have siblings? Isn't anyone interested in having a few items as keepsakes?
A few, sure. But a household's (or more, since we're talking stuff from multiple generations) worth? One would have to have a lot of siblings to divvy all that out for people to have "a few" things. People have their own homes with their own stuff, and probably not much room to fit in duplicates from other people. (Plus, their idea of a "keepsake" might be something that meant something more to a parent than Grandma's old china or a couch-- a piece of clothing or jewelry that was worn often, a favorite book or pen, etc.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by elnrgby
There is a fair number of threads in this retirement forum dealing with accummulated junk and downsizing/uncluttering. The subject appears to be a major drain of people's time and energy via excessive worrying re what to do with the stuff, and how, and when exactly. I figured that life is too short, and storage units too cheap, to sacrifice my time to the subject. I don't want to get rid of my stuff (books, cds, movies on dvd/vhs, pieces of obsolete technology that enable watching/listening to media, old clothes, various travel memorabilia). If I find myself in the situation where I can't contain the stuff at home any more, I'll put it in storage, and after I die, the heir will decide what to keep, and what to dispose of. I have the list of EVERYTHING I own, which will be on offer to everyone in the family (the heir first, of course) - the rest of the list will be posted on eBay/ Amazon/ Craigslist, and offered to antiquarians. The stuff that nobody wants will be donated to local library and Goodwill. If you have the list of everything, and everything organized thematically, it should not be an issue to deal with it. But again, the main point is that storage units are cheap.
I have a personal policy against storage units. If I put it in storage, I might as well get rid of it-- if it's not where I can see it/use it, I might as well not have it, and if I'm okay with putting it away never to touch it again, then I'm probably not emotionally-attached enough to need to keep it. (And, IMO, they're not "cheap." One company in my area starts at $45 a month for their smallest unit. There's a lot I could do with $45 a month besides sink it into renting space to store stuff I will never look at again. If $50-$300 per month is pocket change to you, then sure, it might be cheap. Me, I could take a class, put money into a hobby, or hell, rent a bigger place {or have more to hedge in my current place against skyrocketing rent prices}, or throw it into an investment to cover the medical bills in retirement, if I had a couple hundred extra dollars a month.)
(Ha. Love the username.)
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Originally Posted by JBtwinz
There is a whole generation of possessions sitting in on shelves in Goodwill type stores all over the US.
Unfortunately, yes. And my guess is that a lot of it gets shuffled from store to store for however long their policy gives it, and then it ends up in a landfill.
The problem is that the things people own aren't just priceless collectibles. People have whole houses/apartments full of "everyday" stuff-- Tupperware, Rubbermaid bins, toilet paper roll covers, vacuum cleaners, everyday dishes, books, lawn tools, table lamps, etc. And everybody else in the world has that stuff. And while some people will buy everyday household things secondhand, there are many reasons plenty don't want to-- sometimes when you want to outfit a house (or, just buy a certain thing or two), you just want to go to a couple stores and do so, not scour thrift stores and estate sales for months or years to find everything you want/need. There's a big concern with bedbugs in thrift store items (and from what I hear, that is a massive headache that is not made up for by money or landfill space saved by buying secondhand). And, some people are simply squicked out by it (and/or don't want their house filled with stuff that has already been worn out, stained, warped, frayed, etc. by other people; or is of a style that isn't currently popular; or that may be made better/more efficient these days, or that they may not be into.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by JBtwinz
On the topic of storage units, my buddy's father-in-law just passed away so he was helping his mother-in-law downsize. When his in-laws downsized ten years earlier the father in law rented a storage unit for $100 a month to store their overflow items. He said the only thing of any value was an old table saw, the rest was old furniture and lamps and what not. He could not get over that after paying 12K over the course of ten years he wound up taking just about everything in the unit the dump.
That as well. Not to mention, stuff getting ruined in storage. In these days of indoor climate-controlled storage units, that is probably less of a concern, but as Greatest and Boomer generations get cleaned out, having stored their stuff in garages, barns, and basements, all of the things they saved as "still good" or "might be useful again some day" are found to be moldy/mildewy, musty-smelling, infested with mice or bugs, etc. That was certainly the case with my grandparents.
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Originally Posted by KathrynAragon
My point is, there's still a "market" out there but be willing to give it away!
Sure, but you have to spend time to find the people who want it. And, if you have to have a parent's house or apartment cleaned out quickly, you might not have the time to spend weeks or months trying to track down the one person hopefully in your area who will want the china, the person who will want the jewelry, the person who will want the dining room table, the person who will want the couch, etc.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sand&Salt
We had no interest in our parents' stuff, but we're not very sentimental. Same way I feel about ashes or graves. Seems like people are getting less sentimental, as a general trend?
I think it's sentimentality vs. practicality. "Yes, I feel bad getting rid of this... but... where would I put it if I took it?" Been there and done that. I had to harden my heart against things that I knew I would feel bad about getting rid of later, but would *not* feel bad about not having it taking up space in a small apartment that was already plenty full of my own stuff.
I got it from my library. It's all about leaving things neat and tidy for those tasked with cleaning up after you when your gone. It has other info, too, like getting rid of stuff that you wouldn't want others to find. I found if very freeing.
Which is handy, but you don't always know when you're going to go. Or you might not want to get rid of things you're still using just because you don't want someone else coming across them when you're dead... (I was talking with my dad about end-of-life issues, though, and I thought about suggesting we make a pact: we can each have a box that says "throw this away unopened" and the other person will do it...)
Have you looked into insuring it? Before we were married my wife and I each had a house. When we married we decided to live in "her" place and sell "mine." State Farm told us they wouldn't renew on "my" place if nobody would be staying there. I suppose they're concerned that vandals might break in...or a fire might start and nobody would be there to know it...or thieves would target it.
A good thought. I haven't, but I have rental homes, so I don't think it would be too hard to just fold that in as an under-performer.
The upcoming generation IS different than those in their 20s.
I won a sweatshirt at work with a big logo. Im carrying it in after work. Its MY XL size. "DAD! I WANT THAT!" She is a mens small at best. Its actually flattering and annoying as heck. At the track meet yesterday many of the girls were wearing dad sized flannels. Where do I look when I cant find my flannel shirts in the winter? Yep, my 15 year old daughter's room.
My daughter (18) is the same. She scrounges through my closet, my husband's closet, my jewelry, and whatever else she can find. The few T-shirts and one sweatshirt I saved from my teen years are her favorites and she does almost all of her clothes shopping at thrift stores. She's come up with some items I think should have died a permanent death in 1979, and she actually does wear them. I have to say they look cuter on her than I would have anticipated.
I bought my aunt's house when she died. There is a 12 piece set of China that was here when SHE bought the house so it's probably 30+ years old, if not more. It's taking up room that I could be using but I don't know what to do with it.
My mother gave me a gold toned curio when she downsized and I have collectibles in it. I'm going to keep just my favorites to put in the entertainment center and throw the curio out on the curb. I heard curios and etagere's are "out" and I could use that spot in the living room for my Christmas tree each year. I hate clutter and I'm slowly getting rid of "things" that aren't really important to me.
I have a small curio cabinet in my dining room. It doesn't take up much space and it's filled with a variety of different items - everything from teacups to crystal figurines. I'll probably hang onto it because the items do have some sentimental value, they are pretty and they aren't in the way.
The stuff that drives me nuts is the stuff that is packed away in closets, crawl spaces, basements, chests and attics that is just - there- not in use. Just stored away, sight unseen. That's the stuff that I plan to pare down and get rid of.
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