What Was Going On In Your Parents' Lives When They Were Your Current Age? (moving, state)
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I'm only 43, not retired, but wanted to answer this question because it's something I have thought about lately.
My father was 36 when he was killed in a car accident, and my understanding is that if he had survived, he would have had brain damage and use a wheelchair.
With my mom - when she was my age, she had just moved our family down to Phoenix, and she had taken a year off from working. I do remember that she was starting to get involved in a nearby church, and that she was looking to apply for a job as a teacher's aide.
Father: Who knows? We were not exactly estranged, just never were close due to my parents' divorce when I was a toddler. After he retired in his early 60s from the steel foundry, they moved out of state to where he was raised. We communicated so rarely that I have no idea what he might have been doing other than mowing his lawn, and participating in local family activities with his elderly brothers.
Mother: She was forced into retirement around 59-60 by physical pain. Being extremely low income (meager SSDI and SSI), she lived in subsidized senior housing by the time she was 60. Her health was so poor in her 60s. She had numerous surgeries and hospitalizations by the time she was my age. She passed away at a SNF at age 65, I will soon be 63 and have none of her health issues, thank heavens.
At 63, my father was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma, given 6-12 months to live and was forced to retire. He passed last year at 94. My mom was by his side for 65 years.
My dad was working (he owned his own sole proprietorship so he worked when he wanted to and took off when he wanted to) and my mom wasn't working outside the home. They lived in Arkansas on property my dad grew up on in a house that was over 100 years old. They were not getting along particularly well and a few years later my mom had a stroke after yelling and screaming at my dad for several hours.
The old man had been retired for six years and my mom for maybe three. Her dementia hadn’t fully been diagnosed yet although we were starting to notice the signs. They loved to travel to the Big Bend area in west Texas just after the New Year and then, made their way to Tucson and Quartzsite for the gem and mineral shows. They always stopped to see us for a few days. It wasn’t unusual for them to stay in a particular park for a month or so during their wanderings.
Along the way, they were welcomed by friends and fellow rock hounds. They lived a full, modest life and we miss them every damn day.
My mom was retired for a year by the time she was my age (61) since she has a state pension. My dad (stepdad) was still working as a teacher since he is 6 years younger than my mom. He retired at age 62 with a pension. Both of my parents are still alive and healthy (knock on wood). My mom will be 80 in March and still watches her 2 year old grandson a couple of days a week.
I just turned 70yo. At this point my father had been partially disabled by stroke for 3 or more years, unable to take more than a few unsteady steps. He had carers at home while he spent much time in a hospital bed set up in the tv room where he now always stayed. He died at 71 after suffering progressively more his final years. My mother lived another 30 years passing just shy of 94yo.
1982. Dad was 42 and had a small medical practice. Mom was 40 and his office manager. At this point they had two daughters in college, and decided on a third child (well, technically that decision was made in '81).
2022: Dad is turning 82 and keeps himself busy with a remarkable number of hobbies and clubs. Mom, 80, is somewhat chronically, yet only mildly, unhealthy, and has become a homebody. A lot of their conversations revolve around going to the doctors, talking about their daughters/grandchildren, what groceries they've bought, and the stock market.
No specifics, but they were living a much more complete and fruitful life at my age than me. Wish I could have been more like them.
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