What a way to make yourself feel old suddenly! (grandparent, diabetes, vacation)
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That’s the same thing, pretty much. It’s the disconnect between a frozen-in-time image of that person when you knew them vs. the Now reality. The only difference is in whether the Now is old-looking or dead.
Those images can be tricky.
In 1987, I was watching Lifeforce with friends and commenting about Patrick Stewart. "Now this guy looks very familiar to me and I don't know why........OH, THAT'S THE NEW CAPTAIN OF THE ENTERPRISE!". But the thing was, that was not the reason why he was setting off the alarms in my head but that.......
.......in 1983-1984, I was in love with Time/Life-BBC "Hamlet", checking out the 4th part tape all the time.......and under a beard and wig, he was playing Kind Cladius. Under his false whiskers, his mannerisms had locked into my memory and it was only when I was seeing him in his natural state, in other works, was it triggering recognition.
Or a dancer I ran into at a work shop. She seemed so familiar to me and I did not know why. She was part of one of the recognized troupes her in Texas but that couldn't be the reason, that I knew her better than just a passing glance.......
.........she was one of pictures I took at festival that I had framed and put on my wall and I was passing her image whenever I went into the kitchen of my apartment (at the time).
Then, there are the differences of time but we still get hooked. The late actor Paul Lambert https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0483279/?ref_=tt_cl_t_16
I see him in 60s TV, like the Wild Wild West, he seems so familiar.....and I don't know why. What it is that when I first came across him, he was old in "Blue Thunder" but with some great lines.....and that's how he got locked in my head.
I moved away from my home state a long time ago and didn’t keep in touch with high school classmates. Never attended any class reunions, either. Yet for some strange reason, tonight I got sidetracked into searching names from my HS graduating class. Three of them popped up in obituary listings, with death at different ages.
Even though that’s not many, it made me feel old just thinking of them dead already. The reason is, of course, in my mind’s eye they are still 18 years old.
Try it sometime. There is something especially jolting about remembering teenagers and reading that their older selves are no longer living.
I understand what you are saying. Facebook for many brings it front and center. You can have high school groupings where you are friends and also some you stay in closer contact with. It is unsettling at times to find out some one died you hadn't checked in on Recently especially on their birthdays. What brings it home is when they make reference on their page to someone else dying who you don't pay close attention to. Your immediate reaction is to picture them as you once knew them until you go to their page and see a more recent picture.
It is like that for those you worked, lived with as friends and neighbors etc etc.
Imagine a popular teacher on Facebook with a multiple thousand number of former colleagues, students and parents as friends who stay up with them. If they are in our age range it must be tough seeing those much younger passing.
Not high school----our schools were too big and impersonal and we weren't involved in optional activities there. Never went to a reunion; don't even recall anyone's name, lol.
But DH likes to check the obits regularly where we last lived in Utah. It IS quite sobering to read of long-time acquaintances our age who've passed.
But, for whatever reason, as someone else said, celebrities our age seem to have even more impact.
David Bowie, Meatloaf, Bob Saget, Dusty Hill, and all the other dearly departed....
I think about them more than I do my ex, who passed at 65.
I belong to a Facebook group, a memorial page for those alumni that went to my high school. My late husband has a memorial page for the year that he graduated. They let me on that which was nice of them, as we didn’t go to the same high school.
It’s sad to see people my age or a little older, people I knew, dying. I just had one that shook me up rather well. But what’s worse? Seeing these 20 and 30 year olds dying from so many things. A lot of drugs, cancer, accidents, heart attacks! Just sad.
I belong to a Facebook group, a memorial page for those alumni that went to my high school. My late husband has a memorial page for the year that he graduated. They let me on that which was nice of them, as we didn’t go to the same high school.
It’s sad to see people my age or a little older, people I knew, dying. I just had one that shook me up rather well. But what’s worse? Seeing these 20 and 30 year olds dying from so many things. A lot of drugs, cancer, accidents, heart attacks! Just sad.
All this is going to become moot in couple decades.
Humans will start tolive forever and eventually will populate entire galaxies.
There is a core group of my classmates who all get together quite frequently online and in-person. They all still live in the same general area. I'm not really part of that group because most of them have known each other since kindergarten and I didn't know most of them until High School. That's usually where I find out that someone has passed, either FB or the dedicated website for our year.
There are 2-3 former friends who died very young that I really miss and I sometimes wonder what it would be like if they were still here.
At the end of 8th grade my town had the "8th grade Supper Dance" to introduce us to the kids who we would be in high school with. Our class (of '70) was the first class to go all 4 years at the new high school and the other town needed to incorporate with us.
Well, I feasted my eyes on the most beautiful boy I had ever seen at that dance and immediately fell in "love". I stayed that way all through school even being engaged in my Junior year!! Fast forward to our 40th reunion and he and I were at the bar waiting for our drinks and I said, "I can't believe how I crushed on you for so many years, Billy." I can't remember what he said to me because I didn't like his looks anymore. He was/is still nice looking but my tastes have changed.
We haven't been able to have our 50th because of Covid.
At our reunions there would be a table at the entrance with class pictures of all our departed classmates. Some didn't even make it long enough to be in high school or even jr high!! Those pics were not included. I remember them though.
I got sidetracked into searching names from my HS graduating class. Three of them popped up in obituary listings, with death at different ages.
No, three is not many. My high school has a pretty comprehensive website covering classes from 1907 to 2021. From my own high school graduating class, 57 former classmates are dead. I know of five women I went out with at one time who are already dead. OK, I'm over 70, but far from 80!
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Solly says — Be nice!
I meant how is it that you somehow did not understand that everyone else is aging just like you are? 
Fast forward to our 40th reunion and he and I were at the bar waiting for our drinks and I said, "I can't believe how I crushed on you for so many years, Billy." I can't remember what he said to me because I didn't like his looks anymore. He was/is still nice looking but my tastes have changed. 
