Spacious, family friendly place to live in or around richmond (crime, houses)

[hmstarnes]

I am considering a job that would relocate my family of four (with one onfant, one toddler) from NN to Richmond. We would be selling our house here and buying a new one in or around the city....I grew up in hampton roads so I have a general idea of the flavor of the city and it's outlying areas, but would like some help narrowing down where we should focus our house hunting. Our wish list:

-good elementary and middle schools. Less concerned about high schools
-commute under 30 min to the carytown area (the place where I would work is btwn carytown and the river)
-decent sized lot and yard. We live on a 0.2 acre lot now and I couldn't imagine going any smaller. I am not a city girl so I'm perfectly fine being in a more rural area.
-availability of 2ba/3+bdrm in the 170-215k range, at least 1500sqft. Older houses are fine as long as they are in good repair, I like their charm
-friendly neighborhoods with similar family demographics

What we do not need:
-areas like shortpump...lots of generic big box stuff
-urban setting...I don't mind working in an urban area, but I want mature trees in my yard, nice gardens to look at, etc. Doesn't have to be high end landscaping
-availability to night life. We have two young kids. At this point in our lives we'd just like some peace and quiet.
-area that is high in crime or racial tension
-hoa

Also, how does the cost of living compare to areas like newport news and williamsburg?

Thanks in advance!