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I live in New York City but recently took a long drive through upstate NY on the rural roads through tons of small and mid sized towns. As I passed through the towns I wondered what it would be like to live there and pictured myself being lucky enough to find a job in the town and moving into different houses I saw.
Mostly these were towns of 5000-15000 people. That was the size that caught my eye. These were not suburbs of big cities or places were the majority of the residents were forced to drive 100 miles for work. (I suspect these long commute towns suck the life out of the community and the people who live there.)
Will the people I move next to on the street come over and say hello? Is there still a welcome wagon? Will I be invited to church by the local minister? Will they observe me from afar and not approach me unless I approach them?
My neighbors in NY and other bigger cities I have moved to have never paid me any mind at all.
Your neighbors will likely introduce themselves. However, they may not come to your house to do it. In my experience, I've gotten stopped by neighbors while walking to my car, while gassing up, standing in line at the post office, at any community/school event, etc. I've gone to new neighbors houses, though, to introduce myself and offer any information or help they may need. But, then, I'm too old to be shy or waste time!
Only when I've lived far from town have people drove in to the house to introduce themselves.
Just always remember its a two-way street... if you walk past someone, see someone, live near someone, etc., and you think "they never said hi to me" or introduced themselves, they can say the same thing! Never hurts to introduce yourself (in a humble way of course).
When I moved in, there was a lot of walking by (they walk the road just to see if they catch a look at the new fella) but they really didn't come up the driveway with a pie in hand. But, like branDcalf said, within the first few weeks, every time I went anywhere, someone was coming up to say hello. This wasn't the ususally Hello you get just cause they are friendly, no it was the Hello as in they want to engage cause they stopped, they stand next to you, they just keep smiling, they are looking you over.... In time the neighbors all stopped by with a welcome dish and you were invited to a dinner at their place. And everyone tells you about the place you bought or some fix up you could do and they will help. In rural areas, people get to know you cause there isn;t that many people to know. For me it was weird because although I;m out in the scrub no-mans land of a community, I travel a lot so I;m away which is odd to the other regular residents and made geting to know me strange as they never knew when I was home.
I live in New York City but recently took a long drive through upstate NY on the rural roads through tons of small and mid sized towns. As I passed through the towns I wondered what it would be like to live there and pictured myself being lucky enough to find a job in the town and moving into different houses I saw......
My neighbors in NY and other bigger cities I have moved to have never paid me any mind at all.
I grew up in a wonderful small town of 5,000, and still appreciate the experience enormously. However, I moved to New York (Manhattan), and I just naturally said hello to my neighbors and the people who ran the little neighborhood stores (even the ones that catered to Spanish speakers), and I found NYC to be a very friendly place. Maybe there has been a big change in the tone of the city in the past twenty years, but my experience was that it was a friendly place.
I don't know, maybe I am just a more than average friendly guy, but I certainly have never felt like that.
I technically live about 1 mile out of the small town and only one person stopped while he was walking his dog past my home. He lives 1/4 mile down from me. Otherwise people chat in the local market, post office or convenience store.
I technically live about 1 mile out of the small town and only one person stopped while he was walking his dog past my home. He lives 1/4 mile down from me. Otherwise people chat in the local market, post office or convenience store.
Good point. After a few months you may have to schedule at least 30 additional minutes to grocery shopping because of all the visiting you might do.
One of the reasons people choose to live in a small town is there is less diversity and more people are just like you. The result is people feel more comfortable talking to strangers because they share a common mindset, language and culture. If your neighbors look at you and see you as someone like them who they would feel comfortable with, they will come over and talk, right?
Heaven forbid if you are outside the mainstream of the people in that town though. Different race, religion, culture, style, ESL, etc. Then you are DOA socially, except in progressive college towns.
When I recently bough a cheap place I was greeted by my neighbors at 10pm to my car window with 2 dogs, their son, and the mom with a shotgun (I got there the first time late and slept in the car) . They thought I was someone else sprucing around, my spot use to be a part of their property. Now we're on good terms and I'm happy that I have vigilant neighbors.
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