How is the Dating/Relationships Scene in San Diego versus L.A. for mid-30's girls? (Escondido: best city, house)

[Rosemary007]

Hi All, I'm living in L.A. for almost 7-8years now. I came here originally from western Europe, put myself through Ucla and now I'm finishing up my grad school in business.

It was a quiet challenge to get going in L.A., specially coming from Europe, I had to get used to the distance and the only way to get around is by car.

So, having all my experiences with work, school and socializing, I start to wonder, seeing more and more friends not being able to find a decent guy for a committed relationship.

Even I look cute, (look late 20, but I'm mid 30's, single, no kids etc.) it seems guys in this city want to date women in their early 20's, modeltype, (the wealthier they are, the more modeltype they want) when they are in their 40's. It seems nobody has time for relationships and guys want to have a NSA relationships with no commitment. Even one of my married friend had to undergo a boobjob in order to keep her husband.

I'm wondering and playing with the thought to move to San Diego after I'm done with graduation. How is the dating scene for girls in their mid 30s? Are their single men mid 30-40 who are interested in traditional relationship and eventual marriage?

How is San Diego as a city, the vibe, friendliness and openness of the people compared to L.A.? How difficult or easy is it to find a job with MBA? Is it a city to settle, family friendly with good schools?
Which area of the town is close to downtown, safe and decent rent?

I would appreciate your feedback. Thanks a lot.

[Beware_of_Dog]

Getting out of L.A. is a great choice. People aren't real. The traditional normal people leave L.A. as soon as they grow up and can. I was raised in Hollywood, one block off Hollywood Blvd. I left there when I reached 21, and never moved back. Several of my friends followed me to Lake Tahoe and Northern Calif, and never returned either except to visit their folks. I moved my mom out of there to Escondido as soon as I finished college in Arizona. I can't stand to ever go back there. I have gone back four or five times in 40 yrs and can't wait to get out of there. Usually stay just one night at one of my childhood friend's parents house for a visit and to eat at my old favorite hang outs (Pinks & El Coyote's).

I wouldn't worry about meeting your Mr Right. Love will find you, if and when it is right. Just try and rid yourself of any L.A. phony mindsets that may have become attached to you unconsciously.

[BacktoBlue]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGLZqDXau98

No joke either.

[odannyboi]

^^Who sings this? Urethra Franklin?

[earlyretirement]

I like visiting LA for vacation but I don't think I could ever live there or have any desire to move my family there. Like others said...lots of fake people there. I agree with the other poster that you shouldn't force "love" and it will find you. But definitely LA has to be one of the worst cities in the world for the dating scene. Lots of shallow, artificial people there.

I can't imagine how difficult it must be for females that feel their biological clocks ticking. The good thing now is more and more women are having children later in life and in their early 40's.

San Diego seems like a much more relaxed setting but not sure how the dating scene there is. I'm moving there to raise my family as it seems ideal in many ways.

[ironjello]

well, i've lived in LA before, and I loved it (the city), but I can understand about the "fakeness" of lots of people.
Also, in the 1991 movie, "L.A. Story" with Steve Martin, a commentator says, "Dating in LA? Go back to New York!"
although i am surprised by your comment : your friend had to get a boob-job to keep her husband?! OMG-jEEZ!!

to be honest, i don't know about american men, but i've been really bummed about american women: the worst attitudes ever. (you said you were from western europe). all they care about is $$, and what's worst, is that most of them have this "entitlement" attitude. like the world is there's. personally, girls that i've dated from Germany, Canada, and Australia are WAY nicer, prettier, and plainly (although they have bigger salaries than me), they let men be men, and girls be girls.

[earlyretirement]

ironjello,

While I think it's hard to stereotype all American women, I'd say I can see your point. Before I moved out of the USA, I was the eternal bachelor and serial dated. Tons and tons of dates. You do have a point about MANY being really concerned about finances and $$. I remember dating..... the first types of things the girls would ask is, "what part of town do you live in", "do you have a house", "what kind of car do you have", etc.

I've traveled all around the world and dated girls from various countries and I totally agree with you that girls from other countries are much more laid back, they don't really care about finances or at least they don't make it the primary importance. Basically in many countries "love is simply enough". That's sometimes hard to find in the USA these days.

ironjello, check out this link. I remember reading it a few years ago when it came out. I got a good laugh out of it, especially because I'd constantly meet girls that had this attitude of the girl that wrote it.


The Economics of Gold-Digging - NYTimes.com

[ironjello]

HAHAH. i love it, earlyretirement!!!
not to generalize either, but the nicest girls (to me) have been (1) Spanish girls (2) German girls (that have traveled) (3) Australians!!!! (4) Canadians.

err..Rosemary007: sorry, i don't know if we are helping you or not. all ican say is that san diego is more conservative than los angeles, so maybe that might help. if not, and if you are rich enough, take some weekend trips ot visit friends in NYC. if you can't find a date in NYC, then you can't find one.

[1AngryTaxPayer]

Originally Posted by ironjello

HAHAH. i love it, earlyretirement!!!
not to generalize either, but the nicest girls (to me) have been (1) Spanish girls (2) German girls (that have traveled) (3) Australians!!!! (4) Canadians.

err..Rosemary007: sorry, i don't know if we are helping you or not. all ican say is that san diego is more conservative than los angeles, so maybe that might help. if not, and if you are rich enough, take some weekend trips ot visit friends in NYC. if you can't find a date in NYC, then you can't find one.

Move a girl from any of those places to here and tell me if they change or not. Uh huh.

[earlyretirement]

Originally Posted by ironjello

HAHAH. i love it, earlyretirement!!!
not to generalize either, but the nicest girls (to me) have been (1) Spanish girls (2) German girls (that have traveled) (3) Australians!!!! (4) Canadians.

err..Rosemary007: sorry, i don't know if we are helping you or not. all ican say is that san diego is more conservative than los angeles, so maybe that might help. if not, and if you are rich enough, take some weekend trips ot visit friends in NYC. if you can't find a date in NYC, then you can't find one.

Yeah, it's a dousy isn't it? Ha, ha. Well, I agree for the most part European girls are more laid back. Australian girls as well. I've been all over the world (I spend about 100+ days a year traveling around the world).

Definitely probably the best "catches" are girls in South America. Very genuine, beautiful, big hearts, not materialistic (for the most part). I married a girl I met in South America. Really GREAT wife material.

Funny about NYC. Yeah, I totally agree. There's like 200,000+ more females from age 25 - 44 there than males according to some surveys. I dated a lot of girls from NYC but I found many of them are also very materialistic. These days I think it's hard to change that aspect about many American females. Again, not all. I don't want to generalize.

World's Best City for Men? New York City No. 1 in Survey