San Francisco - the people (San Diego, San Jose: real estate, rent, buying a house)

[Yankeemama]

I am a native San Franciscan who has lived in NYC and Boston, like the OP as well as over seas and brief stints in other U.S. cities. San Franciscans are more difficult to get to know than people from other parts of U.S. but that's more typical of West coast cities. We can be passive aggressive which can be annoying. We can be snobby as can anyone, anywhere. We tend to be more reserved and don't ask nosy questions the moment we meet people. These are traits I noticed over the years but I grew up in the 70's and 80's and stayed till the mid 90's. Things have changed quite a bit. Some changes are just generational.

[andyadhi01]

Originally Posted by NorCal Dude

reciprocal of the bible belt in many ways

Yes particularly when it comes to being friendly, polite and kind to strangers!

[andyadhi01]

Originally Posted by Yankeemama

We can be passive aggressive which can be annoying.

LOL! This can also be kinda fun if you are the perpetrator...

[jeffredo]

As with most places you tend to get only as good as you give. Oh, and mayorhaggar's post is excellent.

[Gatorgrad2004]

Originally Posted by jeffredo

As with most places you tend to get only as good as you give. Oh, and mayorhaggar's post is excellent.

I concur! Mayor, I'd rep you, but CD won't let me!

[mayorhaggar]

Originally Posted by capoeira

"I've lived in big cities, e.g. Chicago, but I've never experienced the complete disregard for civility and humanity that I encounter on an hourly basis here. The "me-first" and "me-only" attitude that is evident from getting cut off and glared at while commuting to the rudeness of clerks and waiters really is taking a toll on us. I'm tired of getting jostled on the train, rammed in the grocery store, or even bumped into at the playground without an acknowledgment that I even exist. Meeting people has never been an issue for me or my wife until we moved here. The denizens of this area are the most insular, close-minded people ever. Forget about small talk, you will only get glares or people literally running away from you."

SF can get on my nerves simply by being more crowded than such a small city feels like it should be, but this description doesn't sound like SF at all. Waiters and clerks in SF are unusually polite and friendly compared to people in other big cities (though it depends on where you go, same as anywhere in the world) and people on trains or buses never "jostle" you no matter how crowded the N-Judah gets, and they make way for you when you need to get off.

And people in any big city are not immediately outgoing to strangers. There are plenty of articles out there about people moving to NYC who can't make friends and find that it's impossible to make small talk in the grocery store line and that nobody seems to want to do anything. Does that mean there's something wrong with NYC? People say the same thing about Paris, London, Tokyo, etc. It's just the nature of the beast, in a big stressful city like NYC or SF people are busy and wary of strangers. But people seem to hold SF up to some sort of higher standard, like it's supposed to be the laid-back hippie metropolis they always thought it was supposed to be. If anything people in SF are wary of strangers because there's so many crazy homeless people and junkies here that you never want to strike up a conversation on the bus or the train because you never know who it will be. People just want to be left alone. But do more structured things in scenarios where you can share a common interest with people, and it breaks down the barriers.

[jade408]

One thing that is "special" about CA, people are rude. Well not in dealing with you, but in basic manners. I.E. people never hold the door for you anywhere, the store, the BART, the elevator. People rarely use "sir" and ma'am." People are generally friendly, but lack basic manners.

[Setsuko]

The people in California as a whole, are usually transplants so this thread is pointless. Why don't you ask people where they are originally from before make a judgment like California is an Island with an homogeneous group or jerks.

[mayorhaggar]

Originally Posted by jade408

One thing that is "special" about CA, people are rude. Well not in dealing with you, but in basic manners. I.E. people never hold the door for you anywhere, the store, the BART, the elevator. People rarely use "sir" and ma'am." People are generally friendly, but lack basic manners.

Eh, those are Southern things. And I see people do it in the Bay Area, just not consistently. And I'm willing to put up with people not holding doors 100% of the time if I don't have to deal with Southerners' weird chivalry/patronizing towards women and their judgmental nosiness and erratic racism.

[larachris]

I am a native San Franciscan and moved to the 'burbs during middle school. I really find that people in the Bay Area are very nice, San Francisco included so I will generalize about the entire Bay Area. There is no perfect place and even if there were, someone would find something to gripe about (this place is too perfect!). I have traveled quite a bit overseas and within the US, and I find people in the Bay Area FOR THE MOST PART, are very nice, polite and open minded. Not, everyone, MOST PEOPLE. I have never had difficulty making friends, just out and about. There are many transplants but most people are welcoming and very curious about people's backgrounds. Not in a nosy way, but in a 'gee, you're interesting' kind of way.
Like the OP, I too have had a taste of Miami/South Florida and it has definitely left a bad taste in my mouth. I can say that not all but MOST people here are not nice, polite or open minded. So without harping on Miami too much, I have to say that some people may look down on SF because of their standards. After 4 months in South Florida, SF, even with its drawbacks, seems like paradise to me. The people do really make or break a city. You can be in a pretty paradise, but really be unhappy if you cannot even get a 'good morning' back from your neighbors.
So yes, I think for someone who likes Boston, minus the snow, SF is a good choice. There are many diverse neighborhoods, so before moving, you should consider spending a week there, and 'hanging out' in a few of them to get a feel for the vibe and see if it suits you.
Good luck!