Leaving family behind

[=^..^=]

Originally Posted by jnanner

yeah, you can't rely on that. nice if it could happen though. i left my parents who i am very close with and my only brother, his wife and my 2 year old niece up north. My husband's brother, wife and 3 year old are there too. My niece asks for her cousins all the time We had very solid reasons for trying to make this move work. Fl to NY is not a hard trip, onle a few hours to fly but even with $79 fares I am asking my parents to spend $400 to visit me. And there are 4 of us so $800 round trip to fly to them. So, no i won't see them as much as i like and yes, this thread has made me weepy. But we are doing our best for our kids and hopefully it all works. We are renting a house btw

That's expensive. I fly home to NYC every few years to visit family. But each year there are less family members to visit. The younger members have scattered all over the country and the old ones are passing away. None ended up here in TN.

Some people are very fortunate and their family does move where they go. I had an aquaintenance here (may she RIP) who moved down when her husband was transferred from NY. Within a few years her mother, then her sister moved down with her young nephew. The nephew now has 6 children. Her whole family ended up here. But most people I know here who moved down are still alone.

That's one fear we have about moving to FL. We fear one of us will be left alone in due time. Being elderly and without family nearby is kind of scary.

[Ken E]

Originally Posted by JohnInChicago

I would like some input from those of you that have left family members behind when you moved to Florida. I know, alot of people say, "don't worry, they will follow you". I don't buy that. I know that they will visit, but it won't be the same seeing my parents or my kids once or twice a year.

You're right there. Don't buy it. I thought that when i moved down to Florida everyone would want to come visit. After all it's Florida. Not so in my case. It was ok for a few years with them coming to visit a couple times and us going up to visit a few times, but theres a whole lotta difference between having a conversation across the table and having a conversation on the telephone. I wouldn't expect my kids to move down here. They would never get ahead. We're headed back soon.

[Rushmore]

Originally Posted by Ken E

You're right there. Don't buy it. I thought that when i moved down to Florida everyone would want to come visit. After all it's Florida. Not so in my case. It was ok for a few years with them coming to visit a couple times and us going up to visit a few times, but theres a whole lotta difference between having a conversation across the table and having a conversation on the telephone. I wouldn't expect my kids to move down here. They would never get ahead. We're headed back soon.

You went from saying that your friends and family have not visited as often as you would have thought, to saying that your kids will "never get ahead here," to saying that you're leaving.

Your kids would be destined for failure and you are moving away because your friends and family didn't visit as often as you had originally hoped?

Or is there more to this story?

[Ken E]

My kids never lived here. They were young when i moved to Fla. They came down to visit a few times but as they grew older and started to raise familys it isnt as easy to visit. I wouldnt expect the to leave the good jobs ect that they have up there to move down here is what i meant. It would be hard for them to get ahead down here. You see it all the time.

[=^..^=]

Originally Posted by Ken E

You're right there. Don't buy it. I thought that when i moved down to Florida everyone would want to come visit. After all it's Florida. Not so in my case. It was ok for a few years with them coming to visit a couple times and us going up to visit a few times, but theres a whole lotta difference between having a conversation across the table and having a conversation on the telephone. I wouldn't expect my kids to move down here. They would never get ahead. We're headed back soon.

My son and his SO were very discouraged when they did some research on jobs in the Bradenton/Sara area these past few months. They're having serious second thoughts about following us there.

[Ken E]

You can always convret that 2 car garage into living quarters for the kids. Thats quite common. I do alo of work in attics and sometimes the only access to the attic is in the garage.

[DaCounselor]

Leaving family and friends behind is definitely tough. I moved out West from the Northeast as a younger guy because I was in search of the "endless summer" beach lifestyle. It has been 20 something years now. No one has followed me. In the early years after the move I got consistent visitors but no so much as time has gone by. Putting distance between you and your family & friends, if you are close, will have a dramatic impact on your life. Counting on people to follow you is not a good idea. I'm as close to my family and old friends as possible given the distance, but the difference is huge.

There are those of us in this world who choose year-round warm weather and that lifestyle over living close to family and old friends. There is no right or wrong, but that is pretty much the choice.