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Old 06-04-2015, 04:29 PM
 
2,407 posts, read 3,175,813 times
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In both of our last two house purchases the sellers realtor interjected an issue claiming it was something the seller wanted. In both instances, the requests didn't seem logical. The one in NJ had the seller wanting some ordinary fireplace andirons and a dehumidifier- but the seller already moved to another state, so the heavy stuff would have to be shipped to them. We caught the sellers realtor removing the items while we were in attorney review and demanded she return them. She did but still insisted the seller's wanted them. That was up in NJ. Here in FL there was some issue with the closing date.

Since we were already in attorney review, I told the attorney (both times) that if the sellers attorney mentioned these items/issues we would certainly agree. Guess what- never came up again.
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Old 06-04-2015, 04:34 PM
 
Location: Sarasota, FL
1,713 posts, read 2,341,150 times
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Why would I want to talk to the guy who used to poop in the toilet? No thanks!
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Old 06-04-2015, 05:50 PM
 
Location: Venice, FL
1,708 posts, read 1,630,329 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Koester View Post
Realtors have it pretty tough in my opinion - not coal miner tough but still. Here's a few reasons why keeping them apart might be good:

-Realtors are part of large financial transactions which are fraught with emotion. The buyers and sellers might both have very strong characters that don't mesh.
-The seller has a huge incentive to bend the truth because they want to sell the house.
-It introduces an unknown factor which puts their earnings in jeopardy. When your income is 100% commission based, you really try to keep communications smooth. Doing weeks of legwork only to have your commission vanish must be discouraging.

Anyway, just my thoughts.
I kinda agree with all this. Last October we sold a house in the Atlanta area that had been on the market since May. The realtor brought numerous prospective buyers to our house, some multiple times. One couple stayed 2 hours, then in 2 weeks came back and brought their teens, and spend 2 more hours. We thought for sure they were gonna make an offer. Nope....never heard from them again, I saw time after time how the realtor has to spend evenings, weekends, and long days hauling people around while they just can't seem to make up their minds. Or now they've decided not to move after all. Or this would be the perfect house, if it weren't for that fan in the bedroom. Good grief.

Our realtor also defended us from overly aggressive buyers who wanted to make a ridiculous offer and have us throw in all kinds of things. She went to the buyers agent and had a long talk with her about not coming back with any more unrealistic offers.

She also put up with US while we went through the all the stages, starting with what we wanted to get for the house initially, and then lowering the price as reality started to creep in, and then lowering it again as the house in Florida approached the finished state, and then moving to Florida and leaving the house empty with a yet-lower price. Not to mention peeling us off the walls a couple of times when people took those lowered priced and tried to low-ball them anyway. Egad..it hurts again just thinking about all that.

I'm sure that keeping the buyers and sellers separate is a good idea....I might have punched a couple of those prospective buyers in the face, given the chance!
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Old 06-04-2015, 06:34 PM
 
Location: Palm Island and North Port
7,511 posts, read 22,871,985 times
Reputation: 2877
I'll give an example with a home I sold to someone right here on this board. I wont name names though. We showed up at the home and the agent had just listed the home the day before and didn't have the lockbox on it yet so she said that the seller will be there. The seller is outback and he comes in and asks if we have any questions about the home and the seller and buyer make small talk, etc. The home was listed at a very competitive price and my buyer says to me that he wants to put an offer in on the home right away. So, we go write up the offer and then go for a second viewing the next day. Again, the seller is home and they talk more about the home, etc. They hit off great and the seller offers to take my buyer out on a fishing trip and they exchange numbers. My buyer decides that he's not going to get a home inspection. He's just going to have the seller walk him around and point out any issues with the home (selling at $800K).

A week or so later my buyer calls me and tells me that the seller told him that he is not leaving the fish cleaning table with the home like they had originally agreed upon. Then he tells him that he's decided to go ahead and take the window treatments that they spoke about. He doesn't know how to handle this because now they are "friends" and the seller is actually moving but in the same development. When we show up for the final walkthrough my buyer notices that the garage door is not functioning properly. If he would have opted for an inspection, this probably would have been caught. After my buyer moves in he finds a whole lot of things that aren't working and were skipped over.

This is just one example of problems that can arise from this situation. I'm fine with buyers and sellers talking but things can get a bit sticky. In my experience it's best to keep a buffer between a buyer and seller.
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Old 06-04-2015, 08:24 PM
 
Location: Rotonda Florida
1,393 posts, read 1,547,354 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beninfl View Post
Why would I want to talk to the guy who used to poop in the toilet? No thanks!

Boy, I missed something there!
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Old 06-04-2015, 08:27 PM
 
Location: Rotonda Florida
1,393 posts, read 1,547,354 times
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Man, in reading the replies I'm getting that there are more jerks out there than I anticipated.

I guess it's not a good idea but in our case it really worked. We're both reasonable apparently and it went great -

I've always been weird.
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Old 06-04-2015, 09:50 PM
 
Location: Sarasota/ Bradenton - University Pkwy area
4,591 posts, read 7,479,388 times
Reputation: 5989
I read something back in 2009 that stuck in my mind. A research study concluded that real estate agents spend approximately one out of every six hours dealing with conflict of some sort.

Unlike most other types of business deals, the sale of a home can get very personal and emotional for the sellers and buyers, therefore real estate agents are very cautious about the parties talking directly with each other. That's because we agents have seen what can go wrong when buyers and sellers do so.

When a seller and buyer speak before an offer has been negotiated, it can often lead to one or both parties giving away information that can hurt their negotiating position if an offer is made. That's why listing agents do not want sellers speaking to buyers one on one at a showing appointment. Seller says something about the house they found and are moving to once they get a contract on this one. Sometimes the buyer actually misses the important information the seller unintentionally shared, but a good buyer's agent will pick up on it and clue the buyers in after the showing. Even an innocent sounding question such as "How long have you lived in this home?" or "Why are you moving?" can give away information that is later used against the seller in negotiating a purchase price. A casual comment can cost you money. And it's not always the seller spilling the beans. Enthusiastic buyers who tell sellers "they just love their home" can end up paying extra $$ to get that home because they showed their emotions up front to the sellers.

The "ban" on seller - buyer direct communications doesn't end when the contract is signed. Keeping communication funneled through the agents can be key to keeping a transaction together to closing. Sometimes a careless remark made by one party might be misinterpreted by the other, leading to conflict, and sometimes to the collapse of the contract. For example home inspections often are hot button situations for misunderstandings. Window coverings, washers & dryers, the fridge in the garage that wasn't mentioned in the contract can all trigger bad feelings between buyers and sellers.

I had a seller once threaten to cancel a deal because a young couple brought mom & dad along with them to the home inspection, then spent most of their time walking through the home discussing what changes they planned to make after closing. The seller, who had lived in the home for almost 40 years, was outraged that they were planning to make radical changes to "his" home.

By the way, some real estate attorneys in our area recommend sellers sign all closing documents in advance so they do not attend the actual closing to avoid any possibility of a conflict at the closing table.


Anyway, that's my take as a long time area agent as to why sellers and buyers normally should do their talking through the agents -- we know what can (and often does) go wrong if the advice is ignored.
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Old 06-05-2015, 03:30 AM
 
Location: Sarasota, Florida
140 posts, read 187,335 times
Reputation: 172
Ha, this also reminds me of when my wife and I were house hunting in Sarasota and we went to an open house. The back of the house had a shared back lawn with other neighbors. We have a cute dog and would need some kind of fence for her. I mentioned that I might like to put up a fence for our dog. The lady selling the house said, "I don't think I'd sell the house to anyone who would put up a fence."

Her husband almost tackled her in taking her out of the room.
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Old 06-05-2015, 04:56 AM
 
Location: Lakewood Ranch, FL
5,663 posts, read 10,707,643 times
Reputation: 6945
This is turning out to be an interesting thread. I thought it would be useful to add that no one, to my knowledge, teaches new real estate agents this stuff. I imagine it either occurs to them as common sense (if they are lucky) or they have a teachable moment somewhere along the way. Considering that so many of us have had the same experiences, I think it is safe to conclude that there are many, many people out there who have that tendency to, as I said before, shoot themselves in the foot either by action, inaction, talking too much, or simply taking the self-righteous indignation approach whereby they immediately want to prove something to the other party and that can range from being uncooperative to defaulting.

I know it looks to the outside world like we do very little (and to be honest there are some bad agents who through laziness or sloppiness don't do all they should) but there is a lot more than meets the eye and I think that's the way it should be. We perform a service and I don't think our customers need to know all the 'flare ups' that can be part of any deal. We are insulators and we do our best to keep any unnecessary stress from our customers.
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Old 06-05-2015, 05:11 AM
 
Location: sittin happy in the sun :-)
3,645 posts, read 7,129,770 times
Reputation: 1877
BB hits the nail on the head........there are some bad lazy agents......................BUT there are also some awesomely good ones......................fortunately this board has (nearly) all the awesome great ones
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