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Old 02-09-2018, 12:47 PM
 
1 posts, read 1,082 times
Reputation: 10

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My son is in the 4th grade with a 504 for AD/Hd and sensory issues. He is making honor roll but the behavior is a struggle. He has trouble with keeping on track and gets in trouble a lot. A lot of the behavior is a result in his se dory system
Being off and the school doesn’t seem to understand. They seem to think because he knows right from wrong he should be doing these things and they are excuses. He does switch classes for about 90min for language arts and reading. I never had an issue with a teacher but she is really rude to my son when he is struggling with behavior. She has no idea how to handle it and just says “what’s wrong with you”.
I have a meeting coming up and we continue to struggle with the same behaviors. I’m not sure what way to go right now. If an IEP would be better but I know they won’t agree to that. Right now he gets two quick breaks during the day and gets extra time for work.
Any suggestions would be appreciated. I know there has to be more the school could do. I hate to see my son struggle because they don’t know how to handle he behavior.
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Old 02-10-2018, 06:29 AM
 
39 posts, read 17,448 times
Reputation: 73
All schools can't act as specialized therapists, the funding is probably not available in the public or private school - the school is clearly not the kind or depth of school that he should attend, you know your son's needs for a long long time, the school not so much, the school can't correct medical ills or personality/physical disorders.


My suggestion is to seek professional medical guidance from qualified sources. You can't blame the teacher because of your own son's behavioral or even medical issues- you had him, not the school or teacher - they can't solve biological issues - the school itself is limited - your kid needs specialized care, you can't push him off on the school or any school, his care is up to YOU - go talk to your family physician, that's number ONE - your answers and help won't be found on City-Data or internet blogs, few if any posters are qualified to help you one bit, again, talk to your primary care physician and ancillary community services that are recommended by those physicians.


The school can't simply cater to ONE student, that's YOUR job. The teacher probably deals with "problem children" every day, all day long.


Consider home schooling since it's YOUR son and you know him better than anyone. Schools deal with screwed up children all the time. The problem seems to be that many of them have screwed up parents as well - that's a double whammy for teachers and administrators.


You state your son "gets in trouble a lot". I would bet he also "gets in trouble a LOT" at home with you as well.


"Home is where one starts" (TS Eliot)
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Old 02-10-2018, 07:09 AM
 
197 posts, read 126,780 times
Reputation: 1025
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob_Brasher View Post
All schools can't act as specialized therapists, the funding is probably not available in the public or private school - the school is clearly not the kind or depth of school that he should attend, you know your son's needs for a long long time, the school not so much, the school can't correct medical ills or personality/physical disorders.


My suggestion is to seek professional medical guidance from qualified sources. You can't blame the teacher because of your own son's behavioral or even medical issues- you had him, not the school or teacher - they can't solve biological issues - the school itself is limited - your kid needs specialized care, you can't push him off on the school or any school, his care is up to YOU - go talk to your family physician, that's number ONE - your answers and help won't be found on City-Data or internet blogs, few if any posters are qualified to help you one bit, again, talk to your primary care physician and ancillary community services that are recommended by those physicians.


The school can't simply cater to ONE student, that's YOUR job. The teacher probably deals with "problem children" every day, all day long.


Consider home schooling since it's YOUR son and you know him better than anyone. Schools deal with screwed up children all the time. The problem seems to be that many of them have screwed up parents as well - that's a double whammy for teachers and administrators.


You state your son "gets in trouble a lot". I would bet he also "gets in trouble a LOT" at home with you as well.


"Home is where one starts" (TS Eliot)
You sound like my grandfather. He also loved to spout off about topics about which he was clueless.

I used to teach special ed, so here goes: Your son does qualify for an IEP, under Other Health Conditions, if his ADHD is resulting in behavioral problems or problems with being organized with school work. Ask to speak with your school nurse or someone in the special ed department at the school board about qualifying him (a real school nurse, an RN, not the "health aide" that sits at the school pretending to be nurse. The real nurse is probably off-site somewhere). In my experience, no one takes 504's seriously, although they should and if your child's teacher isn't following the plan, you have a lawsuit on your hands.

It doesn't sound like you're at a very good school. No teacher should ever ask "what's wrong with you"?

Are you seeing a doctor? Rarely have I seen ADHD managed properly without medication.
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Old 02-10-2018, 07:36 AM
 
39 posts, read 17,448 times
Reputation: 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by TurquoiseSky View Post
You sound like my grandfather. He also loved to spout off about topics about which he was clueless.

I used to teach special ed, so here goes: Your son does qualify for an IEP, under Other Health Conditions, if his ADHD is resulting in behavioral problems or problems with being organized with school work. Ask to speak with your school nurse or someone in the special ed department at the school board about qualifying him (a real school nurse, an RN, not the "health aide" that sits at the school pretending to be nurse. The real nurse is probably off-site somewhere). In my experience, no one takes 504's seriously, although they should and if your child's teacher isn't following the plan, you have a lawsuit on your hands.

It doesn't sound like you're at a very good school. No teacher should ever ask "what's wrong with you"?

Are you seeing a doctor? Rarely have I seen ADHD managed properly without medication.
LOL....sounds like a personal attack to me. Clueless?
Hate to tell you, I used to teach and was a former administrator...BAmdaJD
My opinion is my own, and that opinion is that the parent is responsible for seeking MEDICAL ADVICE from a physician, about any MEDICAL condition that her son suffers from...and certainly not a freaking "real school nurse". And potentially filing a lawsuit against the school still won't solve her son's MEDICAL problem.


MOST Schools aren't qualified to deal with and/or solve these kind of behavioral and psychological issues. It's the parent who is responsible to address and solve these medical issues. Also, suing i.e. "you have a LAWSUIT on your hands" reflects the specious notion that parents should deflect their childrens' medical issues to a school and its administrators. The parent is responsible for the welfare of their own child - first and foremost.....that's a fact.


Schools can't solve medical, social and psychological problems of disturbed students....Disturbed children need specialized care. By the way, many teachers have asked students "what' wrong with you", I know I have, and so have most normal parents. The problem starts with parents (not schools) systematically IGNORING weird and bad behavior ("getting into trouble") AT HOME first.......then suggest it's the fault or shortcomings of the school or a particular /specific teacher.


Sorry, "That Dog Don't Hunt". Even the best teachers can't solve family and/or medical problems. Not their role.
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Old 02-10-2018, 10:27 AM
mba
 
22 posts, read 23,160 times
Reputation: 17
Best practices, in general, benefit all students including the student with ADHD. Asking a child “what is wrong with you?” is wrong no matter who the child. My son wears hearing aids, if he doesn’t respond to you, you don’t ask him, “what are you Deaf?” Anyway... I would pursue the IEP. If his behavior (which is the result of his ADHD) is interfering with his ability to learn, then he qualifies. He does not need to be failing to qualify. ADHD causes deficits in executive functioning which tends to be more profound at school than at home because more executive functioning skills are required to get through the day at school than the unstructured environment at home. So instruction & support for executive functioning weaknesses absolutely needs to happen at school & the sooner the better. Sometimes the special ed teacher supports this - sometimes an OT. Consult CHADD for good information for teachers. The teacher may just need refreshers in how to support kids with ADHD. As I said at first, most tricks of the trade are simply good instructional practices that do not require “special treatment” - they are easily incorporated into any lesson. Wrightslaw has good info on 504s vs IEPs.
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Old 02-10-2018, 11:55 AM
 
39 posts, read 17,448 times
Reputation: 73
Again, go speak to physicians, psychologists and other medical professionals FIRST, certainly not apologist academic bureaucrats...


I'll say this again, lots and lots of teachers and coaches have asked students "what's wrong with you?"...lol...the student might tell you "what's wrong"....such as "I can't hear you", or "I didn't hear you", or "I'm sick to my stomach", or "I have a very bad headache", or "My mother hits me", or "My friend beat me up", or "Im hungry and haven't had anything to eat", or "I didn't sleep last night", or "I don't have my glasses, I broke them", or " I wear hearing aids and something is wrong with them", or "Im pregnant", or a host of other valuable information.


Let's be clear. Asking a student/child "what's wrong with you", and the questioner, i.e. teacher has 'a priori' knowledge of an existing condition of that student/child, might be considered inappropriate. Even Socrates asked questions.


It's not automatically somehow "evil" to ask a student "what's wrong with you"...that's patently absurd ....physicians typically ask "what seems to be wrong?".....what's wrong with education on so many levels these days, is that we've grown too soft, apologetic, and way too politically correct. We've also assumed that children, like their parents need to be medicated.


So, sometimes children act out because they act out at HOME first, and carryover that bad attitude at school, where there is even less supervision, but more "tolerant apologists" bound by terrible academic learning theories that emanate from a cottage industry of leftist academia.


Of all the students I've dealt with, I have found that the majority (over 50%) of children that are screwed up behavioral examples, also have screwed up parents, guardians or caregivers at HOME. The others may have a genetic predisposition for various behavioral actions, but their parents find it convenient to blame the schools and specifically their teachers for not having a "magic wand" - some parents demonize teachers because they aren't "miracle workers" for their kiddos, when they, themselves have abdicated some of their own home responsibilities.


Psycho-babble as also become a cottage industry. When discipline is not found in the home, it's rare to witness it in school or most other social settings. Schools have become scapegoats. Period...full stop.

Last edited by Bob_Brasher; 02-10-2018 at 12:09 PM..
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Old 02-10-2018, 07:01 PM
 
6,211 posts, read 7,403,159 times
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Assuming by your post that he has more issue in one class than others. Is it sensory or behaviour issue? You mention both in your post. What sensory issues does he have and is there something in this particular classroom that causes it compared to the rest of the day? Or is it boredom or dislike of that particular subject that causes his behavior?
What home program do you use for his sensory issues? What techniques has he been instructed in to help him cope with his sensory issues while in school?
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Old 02-11-2018, 03:46 PM
 
Location: Ohio/Sarasota
913 posts, read 2,144,754 times
Reputation: 445
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jlopata View Post
My son is in the 4th grade with a 504 for AD/Hd and sensory issues. He is making honor roll but the behavior is a struggle. He has trouble with keeping on track and gets in trouble a lot. A lot of the behavior is a result in his se dory system
Being off and the school doesn’t seem to understand. They seem to think because he knows right from wrong he should be doing these things and they are excuses. He does switch classes for about 90min for language arts and reading. I never had an issue with a teacher but she is really rude to my son when he is struggling with behavior. She has no idea how to handle it and just says “what’s wrong with you”.
I have a meeting coming up and we continue to struggle with the same behaviors. I’m not sure what way to go right now. If an IEP would be better but I know they won’t agree to that. Right now he gets two quick breaks during the day and gets extra time for work.
Any suggestions would be appreciated. I know there has to be more the school could do. I hate to see my son struggle because they don’t know how to handle he behavior.
Is your concern your son's behavior issues or his learning? Does he have a diagnosis of ADHD from a physician? You are correct that schools typically do not want to create IEP's, but sometimes they have no choice. It appears your son's 504 mandates breaks and additional time, correct? If I was in this meeting, I would ask if they (the school) thought the 504 was working. What would you like to happen with your son?
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:30 PM
 
57 posts, read 47,043 times
Reputation: 92
geez, the schools can't solve all of these psychological , genetic and home problems fos godssake! the schools are burdened enough with almost normal acting children !! a parent is asking the school to solve these kinds of problems //// oh my my! the schools can help but they're not the remedy! wake up parents !
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:45 PM
 
3,583 posts, read 8,352,563 times
Reputation: 3603
Sarasota County is terrible for special needs children - the district was not able to accomodate my child - they are in the dark ages.

Not sure if you will qualify with a 504 but if a child has an IEP he can qualify for the McKay Scholarship which will pay for a private school.

Do not let the school steamroll you - they love to do that - do not sign anything until they give your child what he needs. We had to hire an education lawyer - as soon as we hired one - all of a sudden they worked with us - they only care about their jobs - not your child.
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