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When it comes to potential neighbors, someone who is going to live next to us for a long time, we hold them to a different standard than people who we're OK being just friends or acquaintances with. Me saying that I prefer white people is no different than a black couple saying they would only only do business with other black people... The point is, people have a right to their preferences, especially when considering someone who's going to be their neighbor. I didn't say I would never live next to a black/hispanic/jew because I'm attributing some negative quality to any and all people who look different than me, it's just my personal preference, it's not racism.
Horrible analogy, very uneducated. If you don't like your potential neighbor, don't speak with them and don't make eye contact. If they do something that's illegal and/or disruptive you can call the police and have them arrested/warned etc... You can't avoid a potential mate, not if you want the relationship to last that is... Having to wake up next to, and be around someone on a regular basis is worlds different than simply not liking someone who lives next to you who you're not obligated to interact with at all.... The ridiculous analogies the majority population in this country seem to come up with when it comes to race relations never ceases to amaze me.
It's not up to you to hold your neighbor to any standard whatsoever so as long as they're not breaking the law, and even then you call the police to do the "standard holding". If you don't like your neighbor for whatever reason, then ignore them and mind your ownbusiness! You can't do that when you choose to accept someone as your boyfriend or girlfriend, you can't help what you find romantically and physically appealing. Again, very bad analogy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by IslandCityGirl
The same narrow-mindedness that leads to racism is what you are giving a stamp of approval when it comes to prejudging the potential for a relationship based on race, height, age, eye color. My point is that ALL OF THOSE PREJUDGEMENTS are narrow-minded and misguided, however common they might be. Common does not equal correct. As a man complaining about experiencing racism, you know this very well. Don't you agree that a potential romance should never be based on anything other than getting to know the individual? Isn't that what/who you should or should not be attracted to: the INDIVIDUAL?
If not racist, then your thinking is shallow, to say the least. Your distinction between two types of narrow-mindedness is hair-splitting. It's not different. You don't get to give yourself a pass on this. In the same way that I shouldn't see a white girl walking down the street and ASSUME that I won't be attracted to her because she's white, I shouldn't see a black man walking down the street and ASSUME he is a thug, prior to getting to know either of them. Maybe she's a charm-less idiot and he actually is a thug, but I shouldn't decide that ahead of time, based on race. Pre-generalizing (even if you changed your mind later after getting to know a person) is still racism. In order to move past racism - prejudices in general - in our society, we have to change the way our minds and hearts work on these things. To say it's NOT okay for me to categorize someone by race for reason A, but it is okay for me to categorize them for reason B is folly. You might be surprised at who you could be attracted to if you would look past the superficial stuff in people. That is my point. Thinking that generalizes or categorizes people superficially is at the root of racism.
There are few relationships (if any) that are closer than the one held in a romantic relationship between a man a woman. If you can't stand the sight of someone, or something that someone has, then there's absolutely no point in entering into a romantic relationship with that person, you're not going to be fulfilled and in turn, you're not going to make a very good partner. Obviously you're choosing not to get my point(s), so there's little point in continuing to go back and forth with you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by PollyGlott
Agreed! And as for the O.P., who appears to think he isn't racist, he penned this gem back in April in another thread: I personally wish that all people who are of West European descent would go back to Europe and stay there.
You can't take someone's comment out of context and try to define someone's character by said comment. I don't even remember typing that.
You can't take someone's comment out of context and try to define someone's character by said comment. I don't even remember typing that.
This was 3 months ago.
In context: Thread was "the diversity obsession"
Here are 2 of the OPs posts:
4/5/15
(In response to: Bottom line is...why is problematic for me to want to live in an area that's vastly white It's not problematic. I personally wish that all people who are of West European descent would go back to Europe and stay there.
4/6/15
Western Europeans have stolen and taken credit for more inventions that weren't theirs than all the other races combined. The only thing that West Europeans are good at is scamming other people and selling themselves as superior. More and more people are beginning to call bull**** on your people.... Western "superiority" is quickly fading, and I'm glad I'm alive to see it.
As far as Americans and self interest, that's all Americans are interested in, themselves. When you tell Americans that their taxes are funding more innocent people in Iraq being bombed to hell and killed than actual terrorists and they simply shrug their shoulders, how else could their attitude be defined? Americans are entirely convinced that they're the center of the universe and that no one else matters, it's disgusting.
In terms of "racism", the quotes speak for themselves.
Location: St Thomas, USVI - Seattle, WA - Gulf Coast, TX
811 posts, read 1,146,950 times
Reputation: 2322
Quote:
Originally Posted by LongNote
There are few relationships (if any) that are closer than the one held in a romantic relationship between a man a woman. If you can't stand the sight of someone, or something that someone has, then there's absolutely no point in entering into a romantic relationship with that person, you're not going to be fulfilled and in turn, you're not going to make a very good partner. Obviously you're choosing not to get my point(s), so there's little point in continuing to go back and forth with you.
Longnote, you're right, we're at an impasse, clearly. Your argument about attraction is short-sighted, to say the least, and your conviction to hold onto stereotypes as just and reasonable in one area of you life while demanding better of others in other facets, right here on this thread, is ridiculous. Yes, physical attractions are a big part of romance, but, guess what: our physical selves change A LOT over time. They do not define us. If I know I'm hopelessly attracted to men with dark hair and the man of my dreams goes bald in a few years, then what? Am I no longer attracted to him? Do I divorce him for someone that I can "stand the sight of?" Of course not! I love him and want him just as deeply! Worse yet, what if I completely overlook the man of my dreams because he's bald from the get-go, instead of donning the dark hair that I'm so determined that I'm attracted to? I'm doomed to miss my soulmate due to my own ignorant, superficiality. Don't you see how ridiculous, shallow, short-sighted, and PREJUDICE that sounds? Surely you see how shallow your thinking is here. Either way, you are wise to say we're done here. My points have been made and our convictions are simply different here. I'll simply say one more time: Thinking that generalizes or categorizes people superficially is at the root of racism. I hope that your heart and mind will open further to all kinds of great possibilities as you move forward in your life. Best of luck to you.
This was 3 months ago.
In context: Thread was "the diversity obsession"
Here are 2 of the OPs posts:
4/5/15
(In response to: Bottom line is...why is problematic for me to want to live in an area that's vastly white It's not problematic. I personally wish that all people who are of West European descent would go back to Europe and stay there.
4/6/15
Western Europeans have stolen and taken credit for more inventions that weren't theirs than all the other races combined. The only thing that West Europeans are good at is scamming other people and selling themselves as superior. More and more people are beginning to call bull**** on your people.... Western "superiority" is quickly fading, and I'm glad I'm alive to see it.
As far as Americans and self interest, that's all Americans are interested in, themselves. When you tell Americans that their taxes are funding more innocent people in Iraq being bombed to hell and killed than actual terrorists and they simply shrug their shoulders, how else could their attitude be defined? Americans are entirely convinced that they're the center of the universe and that no one else matters, it's disgusting.
In terms of "racism", the quotes speak for themselves.
Ahh yes, now that rings a bell. I'm not sure that I would classify my previous statements as being racist per se, it's just my observation of the self-absorbed society that is America.
Looks like you guys sniffed out a rather racist troll! Congrats!
I find it ironic that some of people who complain about racism are actually quite racist.. How many times have I been called racist names when I use to hang around MLK Jr neighborhood of NE Portland in the 90s.. One time I was even threatened with violence and called a "white mother f****r" by a bunch of gang banging thugs, who proceeded to chase me out of NE Portland, because I was in the "wrong hood" and had the wrong "skin color". Of course, anyone with a lot of melanin in their skin cannot be racist, only people with lighter complexions. Yeah right!
Longnote, you're right, we're at an impasse, clearly. Your argument about attraction is short-sighted, to say the least, and your conviction to hold onto stereotypes as just and reasonable in one area of you life while demanding better of others in other facets, right here on this thread, is ridiculous. Yes, physical attractions are a big part of romance, but, guess what: our physical selves change A LOT over time. They do not define us. If I know I'm hopelessly attracted to men with dark hair and the man of my dreams goes bald in a few years, then what? Am I no longer attracted to him? Do I divorce him for someone that I can "stand the sight of?" Of course not! I love him and want him just as deeply! Worse yet, what if I completely overlook the man of my dreams because he's bald from the get-go, instead of donning the dark hair that I'm so determined that I'm attracted to? I'm doomed to miss my soulmate due to my own ignorant, superficiality. Don't you see how ridiculous, shallow, short-sighted, and PREJUDICE that sounds? Surely you see how shallow your thinking is here. Either way, you are wise to say we're done here. My points have been made and our convictions are simply different here. I'll simply say one more time: Thinking that generalizes or categorizes people superficially is at the root of racism. I hope that your heart and mind will open further to all kinds of great possibilities as you move forward in your life. Best of luck to you.
I haven't demanded anything from anyone. Furthermore, there's no chance of me missing out on a potential "soul mate" by not dating a woman who's of European descent, especially West European descent, it's impossible.... IM!-possible. I think you should ask yourself why this is such a big deal to you. Is it really so egregious that someone would dare to have the audacity not to fall head over hills for every European they come across? If someone told you they could never date an African American, Asian American, or Latino American, would you put up this much of a defense? No you wouldn't... Why? Because you feel that everyone should just put up with racism and being considered second class citizens, everyone except European Americans that is. It's a double standard that makes me sick to my stomach and I refuse to support and perpetuate it.
Location: St Thomas, USVI - Seattle, WA - Gulf Coast, TX
811 posts, read 1,146,950 times
Reputation: 2322
Quote:
Originally Posted by LongNote
I haven't demanded anything from anyone. Furthermore, there's no chance of me missing out on a potential "soul mate" by not dating a woman who's of European descent, especially West European descent, it's impossible.... IM!-possible. I think you should ask yourself why this is such a big deal to you. Is it really so egregious that someone would dare to have the audacity not to fall head over hills for every European they come across? If someone told you they could never date an African American, Asian American, or Latino American, would you put up this much of a defense? No you wouldn't... Why? Because you feel that everyone should just put up with racism and being considered second class citizens, everyone except European Americans that is. It's a double standard that makes me sick to my stomach and I refuse to support and perpetuate it.
Wrong-o, my friend. Now you're just stretching things to ridiculous lengths to maintain a shred of argument. The only reason this has been a sticking point in this thread is because it is so ironic that you don't see your own prejudice (which is this romance ordeal in particular) while pointing it out in others. Period. It's interesting that you're now putting me - the white girl - in a box though and making assumptions about me. All of which are unbased and totally false. My statements have been nothing but objective. Here's another example for you that will clear things up: I have a very dear friend who is about 4'11" and from Guatemala. He was determined for YEARS that he simply was and only could be attracted to tall, white, blond women (like me). He married one and it didn't work out, but he continued to seek out tall, white, blond women, ignoring other attempts to set him up. He told me over and over again, "I'm just not attracted to Latin women, or short women. It's just how I am! I like what I like!" I argued with him (as did other friends) in the same way that I am arguing with you here. I urged him to stop being so narrow-minded, to stop making assumptions about Latin girls and short girls and get to know them as individuals. Guess what, irony of ironies, he finally listened to his friends, got beyond his own superficial prejudice and is happily in the arms of a short, Latin woman today. There you have it. Trust me, I have no personal complex about being rejected as a "European" woman (c'mon don't forget my 2% African, and I didn't mention the 10% Armenian - cut me some slack, LOL!). I'm just really glad that I've experienced people for who they are, instead of what they look like. My dating life was and married life is better and richer because of that. Life is happier, more fun, and more fulfilling when you're not superficial (or racist). Best to you!
wrong-o, my friend. Now you're just stretching things to ridiculous lengths to maintain a shred of argument. The only reason this has been a sticking point in this thread is because it is so ironic that you don't see your own prejudice (which is this romance ordeal in particular) while pointing it out in others. Period. It's interesting that you're now putting me - the white girl - in a box though and making assumptions about me. All of which are unbased and totally false. My statements have been nothing but objective. Here's another example for you that will clear things up: I have a very dear friend who is about 4'11" and from guatemala. He was determined for years that he simply was and only could be attracted to tall, white, blond women (like me). He married one and it didn't work out, but he continued to seek out tall, white, blond women, ignoring other attempts to set him up. He told me over and over again, "i'm just not attracted to latin women, or short women. It's just how i am! I like what i like!" i argued with him (as did other friends) in the same way that i am arguing with you here. I urged him to stop being so narrow-minded, to stop making assumptions about latin girls and short girls and get to know them as individuals. Guess what, irony of ironies, he finally listened to his friends, got beyond his own superficial prejudice and is happily in the arms of a short, latin woman today. There you have it. Trust me, i have no personal complex about being rejected as a "european" woman (c'mon don't forget my 2% african, and i didn't mention the 10% armenian - cut me some slack, lol!). I'm just really glad that i've experienced people for who they are, instead of what they look like. My dating life was and married life is better and richer because of that. Life is happier, more fun, and more fulfilling when you're not superficial (or racist). Best to you!
islandcitygirl, respect! I must share with you that I think of this song whenever I see your posts, especially with this post topic https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xhad3LnxApg
Never felt like Seattle was particularly racist, but I can definitely see why a black or Hispanic person could easily jump to that conclusion and internalize those ideas. The city is shockingly white, which is unusual for a large coastal city. I have indeed come across racist whites, but they were usually blue collar ones from places like Auburn and Kent who were complaining about Asians or Jews.
After dealing with black nationalists in cities like DC, I'm hardly sympathetic to the black cause anymore.
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