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That's a hard call, so many things are mistaken for ADHD now. My son is very hyper disordered but he is also gifted which is commonly misdiagnosed for ADHD. The two are so similar, he could have both as well, I as a layman would never be able to sort it out. Google gifted children misdiagnosed with ADHD and you'll understand.
Tourettes is also a hard one, especially when kids appear clumsy. It's such a hard spectrum. You could, like other posters have suggested, just try the meds and see but knowing for sure they have ADHD is probably never going to happen. It's very hard to know for sure.
I just deal with symptoms and go from there. I try not to label anymore. Labeling has become sort of trendy, that tells me something is off. As a society we want to help but at this point we might be doing more harm than good. It's not like we haven't made mistakes historically until we fully understood the medical reasons behind certain issue. I'm waiting it out until we have better studies done. It's a very personal journey. We have a perception of whats healthy and normal but I'm not sure it goes beyond our perception yet. IMO, of course.
Poppy, I'm apparently stalking you across different boards
Our sons sound very similar. I think it is important to note again that one does not "have adhd" there is no diagnostic test for ADHD. A person has a series of symptoms that we call adhd and the various causes of those symptoms are both known and unknown.
My son is gifted, hyper, and has tics. He was also premature and was adopted. Are his symptoms a result of his giftedness? His prematurity? The fact that he spent the first 6mths of his life in an orphanage? Did his birthmother drink alcohol while she was pregnant? Was her maternal care sub par? Any of these things and many others can lead to the symptoms that we call adhd or it could simply be a genetic personality trait that was passed on from his biological parents. While it is wonderful that some parents can find and treat the reasons behind their child's adhd symptoms, many of us never find the reason or find that it is untreatable.
Btw since this thread began we have stopped medicating our son and he is doing well. But, I would never judge people who do medicate in an effort to help their children.
When he has a video game to play, how long does he spend playing???????? before abandoning the game???????
That's really not a good way to figure out if someone has ADHD or not. People with ADHD tend to hyper focus on certain tasks.
OP- Here is my perceptive as a grown adult with ADHD. When I was a child my parents wouldn't put me on medication. They didn't believe I had ADHD because I'm a girl and back then mostly it was boy's being diagnosed with the disorder. ADHD also tends to have different symptoms for girls. So they dismissed it. As a grown adult, I went back to college and worked a full-time job. It was a struggle concentrating on my tasks. I finally went and got on medication. The second day on it, I cried. The difference was night and day. I was able to focus on what I was doing. I wasn't getting distracted by the slightest little things. I was also a little angry that I spent so many years struggling in school, with people, etc. I felt like I was a little robbed of life to be honest. When I was little, I didn't understand why everyone was always upset with me. Why people would be frustrated with me. Why I couldn't do my homework when I REALLY wanted to do it. I felt like everyone was always mad at me, like I was letting them down all the time.
My daughter was diagnosed a few years ago. I put her on medication. The difference at school was night and day. She went from being a C/D student to A/B's in a matter of a few months. She has learning disabilities as well so this was a huge change. She finally started being able to understand her math assignments.
I have a son that also has ADHD. He is not on medication as of yet. He is doing ok in school and right now, it's not what is best for him.
Kids are different. Meds are aren't to be taken lightly BUT if you decide that is what is best for your child, then don't let anyone else make you feel guilty for that decision.
Poppy, I'm apparently stalking you across different boards
Our sons sound very similar. I think it is important to note again that one does not "have adhd" there is no diagnostic test for ADHD. A person has a series of symptoms that we call adhd and the various causes of those symptoms are both known and unknown.
My son is gifted, hyper, and has tics. He was also premature and was adopted. Are his symptoms a result of his giftedness? His prematurity? The fact that he spent the first 6mths of his life in an orphanage? Did his birthmother drink alcohol while she was pregnant? Was her maternal care sub par? Any of these things and many others can lead to the symptoms that we call adhd or it could simply be a genetic personality trait that was passed on from his biological parents. While it is wonderful that some parents can find and treat the reasons behind their child's adhd symptoms, many of us never find the reason or find that it is untreatable.
Btw since this thread began we have stopped medicating our son and he is doing well. But, I would never judge people who do medicate in an effort to help their children.
LOL, stalk away. We do seem to have very similar circumstances. I agree with everything you've said. I can say my son wasn't a premie, I didn't drink and he wasn't in an orphanage and still is gted, hyper and tics. Maybe genetics as my husband and I are from a long line of gft, hyper and ticky people. The nice thing is as we've aged it fades. Around 18 to 20 most of these symptoms are virtually gone.
We are going to visit a neuropsychologist this summer. We will see what goes down. He specializes in gfted kids with combo issues. He also wrote a book about misdiagnosing gfted children and how to tell if they have really have a coexisting issue or not. Up until now we've just rolled with it, but it's getting more difficult and sometimes I feel really sorry for him. You know how gifted programs are, they tell you everything your child does is somehow related to being gifted, so you really never have clear definition. Maybe we never will. I sometimes wonder who came up with the name "gifted" as it's far from a gift at times. lol They should have named it "complex"
I don't see an issue with medicating either if it helps. Some of my family members medicate and it seems to work, some don't and cognitive therapy seems to work. I think it depends on severity of symptoms. If they are miserable in their own bodies then whatever works I'd go with it, I agree with you, you can at least try it as an option. So far I've just not been given the option and my son is happy with himself. We will see what my summer brings. I must say I'm a bit exhausted as he is a mile a minute.
That's really not a good way to figure out if someone has ADHD or not. People with ADHD tend to hyper focus on certain tasks.
OP- Here is my perceptive as a grown adult with ADHD. When I was a child my parents wouldn't put me on medication. They didn't believe I had ADHD because I'm a girl and back then mostly it was boy's being diagnosed with the disorder. ADHD also tends to have different symptoms for girls. So they dismissed it. As a grown adult, I went back to college and worked a full-time job. It was a struggle concentrating on my tasks. I finally went and got on medication. The second day on it, I cried. The difference was night and day. I was able to focus on what I was doing. I wasn't getting distracted by the slightest little things. I was also a little angry that I spent so many years struggling in school, with people, etc. I felt like I was a little robbed of life to be honest. When I was little, I didn't understand why everyone was always upset with me. Why people would be frustrated with me. Why I couldn't do my homework when I REALLY wanted to do it. I felt like everyone was always mad at me, like I was letting them down all the time.
My daughter was diagnosed a few years ago. I put her on medication. The difference at school was night and day. She went from being a C/D student to A/B's in a matter of a few months. She has learning disabilities as well so this was a huge change. She finally started being able to understand her math assignments.
I have a son that also has ADHD. He is not on medication as of yet. He is doing ok in school and right now, it's not what is best for him.
Kids are different. Meds are aren't to be taken lightly BUT if you decide that is what is best for your child, then don't let anyone else make you feel guilty for that decision.
I hear this a lot. Some people who really do suffer from ADHD find great relief when medicated and that's great. I think the problem parents have are starting a child so young on a medication without concrete testing or really knowing whats right. It's hard for a parent to do this with all the mixed messages out there. I'm sure your mother struggled mentally trying to understand it. She might have had it as well and was unable to notice it in herself or you. As a parent you hear a wide variety of stories from it works great and changed my life for the better, or my parents drugged me during my childhood, to my child killed themselves on medication. It's a hard choice for a parent to make for their kids. While you treat your child for all kinds of things, testing for ADHD isn't as precise as parents need for these heavy choices. IMO, of course.
Hopefully in the future it gets a bit easier for parents who are laymen when dealing with ADHD. Just look at the varying posts of advise on here. It's not any better when you're off of here.
Since you have it, you have a clearer picture in your head of what works for your kids. Your mom did not.
I have a ten year old son with ADHD, SID, and anxiety. He also is very intelligent, which throws in a few more problems.
He was diagnosed with ADHD in first grade. He'd been telling us for a while that "something was wrong with my brain." He's very self-aware. After we got the diagnosis (just ADHD, though the doctor suggested we get him tested for SID), we told him and he said he wanted to "fight it" and did not want medication. We pretty much felt the same way, so we gave it a try.
His teacher knew about the doctor visit and diagnosis and we had a meeting with her about a month afterwards. She told us that my son was a different child than before and whatever we're doing, keep doing it. We told her what happened and that he was not taking medication and she was shocked. She thought for sure he was.
That lasted for a couple of months, then the Christmas season hit. My child could not handle all the extra excitement, sensory input and his behavior spiraled quickly downwards. It was traumatic for him and us.
Over Christmas, we decided to try medication. It did take a couple of different ones to find the right one for him, but he's been on Vyvanse for the past year and he's done wonderfully! He says he can't tell the difference, but his behavior is good, he's finishing his work, and he's not as impulsive.
All our children have potential and medication helped my son's brain to calm down enough so that he can learn and work to his ability. He just cannot function at school without it.
First of all, it can be hard for anyone to concentrate on something that is boring to them. Nearly everyone would have ADHD if that is the criteria. Secondly, I know my daughter does not have ADHD. For one, when she was having her worst attention issues in elementary school, a psychologist did give her an attention test, which my daughter passed without a problem. Also, I gave my daughter the gift of time. Most of her attention issues have gone away over the years. There isn't a single middle school teacher that she has now who complains about her attention. This was not the case in elementary school.
It is actually disturbing to me what your doctor told you about allergies etc. If you have a problem like an auditory processing disorder that is causing attention issues, you should treat that and not assume it is just really associated with ADHD. For heavens sake, everything is not caused by ADHD. Allergies are an ENTIRELY different physical problem that involves the immune system, not neuron interaction in the brain. In addition, the audiologist we saw had an endless number of stories about kids who were misdiagnosed with ADHD and improved greatly when their unnecessary medications were stopped and auditory training started.
Sorry I missed this earlier. First of all I want to say that I was not in any way insisting or even suggesting that your dd has AD/HD b/c only you and her docs know how she's behaving and I'm a random stranger on the internet.
I was using your post as a springboard to point out that AD/HD is often co-morbid with other conditions such as learning disabilities and the most common LD it's co-morbid with is auditory processing disorder. I am also aware that there are many things that can look like AD/HD when in fact it's something else, but I do think my doc was right on target with the observation that allergies often go with. Yes I'm aware that they're entirely different processes but they often seem to go together and I've noticed that I'm spacier during allergy season. Also, while AP problems are rampant with me, so are AD/HD symptoms that have nothing to do with listening.
The best thing for anyone to do who suspects AD/HD is to see a specialist b/c a family practice doc just does not have the experience to make a proper dx--they can only go on what is said and what is said is often just the immediate problem which may be caused by something else. A specialist will look at your life history.
As for the boredom: again it's a matter of degree. For instance, assuming that you don't have AD/HD yourself, I'm also assuming that you keep up with paperwork for the most part. Bills usually paid on time, etc, and that if something unusual were to happen, like say the possibility of losing your house or job unless you took care of a big batch of paperwork, you would do what it takes. Someone with AD/HD would dither and stew over it until the very last minute, trying to make a decision about how best to take care of it and putting off looking for the necessary papers b/c things are scattered all over the house and Lord knows which pile it's in and maybe it's not here at all but the ex took off with it. . . And either they would lose the house or job or they would come very close and there would be a hefty fine attached. Yeah, I had my taxes done this year b/c I screwed them up last year and also paid late. So this year I had them done early and still managed to get the check in the mail just 15 minutes late but they still fined me close to $90 and I got the letter in the mail over a week ago but still haven't done anything about it. That's what ADD looks like. There are days when I absolutely despise myself but it's some better now that I know what's causing it. Mostly I just feel as if I have less discipline than almost everyone I know and I drive myself crazy.
I am all for better living through chemistry - if doing better in school and with peers is a goal, and medication helps, then go for it.
HOWEVER...... my adhd/mildly autistic son is not medicated for several reasons.
1) The top reason is that we tried medicating (5 different medications), and in addition to the nausea and vomiting, he eventually became paranoid, hallucinatory and had thoughts about suicide. So, regardless of any other reason, we wouldn't medicate under any circumstances. The upside is he has absolutely no interest in even trying drugs, he got so scared from his experience.
2) Tics - to this day, he has facial and mild vocal tics. I'm pretty sure it was triggered by the meds, but not sure.
3) When he wasn't vomiting, the medication did wonders for his concentration and focus. It also made him flat and just not my little energizer bunny. Considering he is an incredibly gifted musician (cello and thrash metal drummer) I wonder if we had continued the meds if he would be doing what he is doing now. At 17, he began booking and promoting metal shows, and now has a part time job with a booking agency. I think that the meds would have improved his grades and interpersonal skills, but definitely suppressed his creativity and musicality.
2) Tics - to this day, he has facial and mild vocal tics. I'm pretty sure it was triggered by the meds, but not sure.
Neko, I had those for a short time after getting on adderall but got some magnesium pills and began to take them and haven't had a problem since. Those with AD/HD tend to run short of mg anyway. If you want a food source, all fruits and veggies are good ones but dark green leafies the best. But yeah, for awhile my eyelid was going crazy and it made me self conscious b/c I could even see it twitching in the mirror.
I really wish someone would have given me pills when I was younger, I was always called lazy and stupid even though I have a IQ that is in the high 140's. I had a hell of a time getting through school because of it. Even now sometimes I struggle with it but I have learned what works and what doesn't with me.
I oldest son was disgnosed with ADHD at around age 6. His kindergarden and first grade school years were horrible because of that. We had him evaluated before he went into 2nd grade. It took us awhile, but we decided to put him on Ritalin. His year in 2nd grade was SO much bettter. He was having problems not only in school, but on the bus, in the schoolyard, in all aspects of his schoolday. The Ritalin gave him the ability to focus better and hold still longer. He was not drugged up, his personality was the same, he was the same child only with a better ability to calm down and focus.
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I sometimes wonder who came up with the name "gifted" as it's far from a gift at times. lol They should have named it "complex" 
There are days when I absolutely despise myself but it's some better now that I know what's causing it. Mostly I just feel as if I have less discipline than almost everyone I know and I drive myself crazy.
