What is really wrong with St. Louis? (University City, Ballwin: lawyers, job market)

[FrankMiller]

Dear Guns & Ammo,

I never thought it would happen to me...

[HughGrantMonSantoCEO]

Originally Posted by Max61

It's funny because it seems like people have either a shunning experience or a friendly welcoming experience.

St. Louis often gets ranked as one of the friendliest cities in the country. However, that doesn't mean everyone is friendly.

I have had the opposite experience where I have felted welcome and eagerly accepted into new groups. I would suggest trying meetup.com to find some groups of interest to you see if you can make friends and get involved that way.

I hope your experience changes for the better.

Not really. I lived in STL for seven years. Worked in West County, did the West County/City Hipster things, and met more than my fair share of miserable losers, aged 22-40, living with their parents - reminded me of Chazz Reinhold, Will Ferrell's character from the Wedding Crashers, grown men living at home in a humid, flooding basement in the St. Louis Suburbs, waiting for his/her folks to die so they get the house.

LAME.

[MUTGR]

I didn't even realize there was a Hooters downtown:

1 killed, 2 wounded in shooting outside downtown St. Louis Hooters | Law and order | stltoday.com

[edsg25]

Originally Posted by Brooklynite1114

IMO, the STL is like the BAL's son.

St. Louis (Browns) gave birth to Baltimore (Orioles); seems to me StL is the father and Balt the son.

[MOforthewin]

Originally Posted by MUTGR

I didn't even realize there was a Hooters downtown:

1 killed, 2 wounded in shooting outside downtown St. Louis Hooters | Law and order | stltoday.com

It's been there a long time. Not the first time there have been shootings at or around Union Station. Of course if you're a permit less carry holder you can't carry into a bar. Repeal gun free zones in Missouri! There are two bills in the house that would do that!

[MUTGR]

Another firm considering a move due to crime:

Brown and Crouppen says crime in downtown St. Louis may lead to firm moving | Business | stltoday.com

[STLCityMike]

Originally Posted by MOforthewin

It's been there a long time. Not the first time there have been shootings at or around Union Station. Of course if you're a permit less carry holder you can't carry into a bar. Repeal gun free zones in Missouri! There are two bills in the house that would do that!

Hooters left Union Station a few years ago and is now on 7th and Chestnut across from Memorial Plaza.

[glamatomic]

It must have been more than a few years ago... it had already relocated out of Union Station when I first moved here (for the first time) in 06

[STLCityMike]

Originally Posted by glamatomic

It must have been more than a few years ago... it had already relocated out of Union Station when I first moved here (for the first time) in 06

Thanks, I knew it moved. I have never been so when wasn't really sure when. Mostly, I was indicating a user was not fully correct with their information.

[Eyes_window]

Originally Posted by eulercircles

I've been in St. Louis now for about 2 years and 9 months. I moved here from Florida to get a job, and I have lived in quite a few other places. I lived in Florida when I was younger, in Ohio during middle and high school years, went to the Navy and lived in Chicago, Washington, D.C., and Japan. I stopped for a while in places like Virginia Beach, San Diego, San Antonio, and San Francisco -- long enough to get an idea of what people are like.

Since moving to St. Louis, I've noticed something very different about this city, but I can't quite figure it out in great detail. Compared to everywhere else, people here seem very unfriendly. Not so much rude, but rather inconsiderate and uncaring of others. People will walk right in front of you at stores, not notice or care that you're there, not say excuse me, etc. They seem to care more about themselves, what they're doing and where they're going, than they do about other people in the same space, like they're totally oblivious. They will make no effort to move if they're blocking the way, or yield when it's appropriate--as if they have no concept of sharing public space with other people. There also appears to be a lack of curiosity about other people.

People I've talked to at my last job would act the next day like we've never met. They would avoid eye contact or greetings when passing in the hallway. The place I work at now is a little better, but there are also a lot of people there from other states and countries. The natives walk around the place like they're better.

I do not have any friends, and cannot see a way to make any in this city. I have heard people talk about the "where did you go to high school" question, which is apparently meant to evoke the most important information about you to the St. Louisan's ear with which to categorize you. I haven't been asked this because I find people so unapproachable to begin with I don't start conversations.

Other explanations I've heard or read don't seem to fully explain it. They talk about people with a lot of money, etc... They say it's like this in West County, but not in [insert any other township in the county]. However, I'm starting to think this place-where-it's-not-like-that to be a myth. I've found the same dull, uncaring, down-looking, arrogant, attitude in every corner I've visited here, wealthy or poor. Keep in mind, I've been to quite a few other places, and have a lot to compare it too. I've been to wealthier areas in other states, and have seen how uppity these people can be. But still, they're friendlier by comparison to most people I've met in St. Louis, even one's not so wealthy. And West County is nothing at all to be so proud of in the first place. There's no structure to the towns, it's not beautiful, not memorable. It's just some place.

Again, I don't think people here in St. Louis are so much rude or out-and-out jerks (they're more passively judgmental and smug). I've certainly seen people like that elsewhere. The difference is that in those other places, despite some very obviously rude and deficient people, there are many other, different kinds of people around. You don't have to look very far to find some friendlier and saner people. In St. Louis, it seems like everyone has exactly the same personality, and it is that personality that I already mentioned.

I'm not the only one who thinks this. I've run into other people from elsewhere who have said the same things I say, before I've even given them my own take.

I don't really know what's going in this city, but I feel it and I'm not the only one. I can't accept things like "well, they have money" as an explanation. Just having money doesn't necessarily turn you into the kind of personality (or lack thereof) that I've seen here. Neither does "being far away from everything else" or "lacking in exposure to different ideas" explain how the mentality that exists here (whatever it is) got that way to begin with. It's easy to imagine a place that's very friendly and stays very friendly due to the lack of exposure to ruder personalities. I.e., insularity only explains why it doesn't change, not how it got this way.

If I had to sum up the impression I get in one word, it would have to be soulless. If I had some way to understand the mentality that exists here, perhaps I'd have a different perspective. However, as I said, interaction is severely minimal. And I haven't heard anything from anyone that would even begin to clue me in to the mentality that exists. Perhaps there isn't one. Perhaps people here don't think at all and are completely clueless about how they appear to outsiders.

I know everything about your experience in STL. Have you heard of STL Transplants? They are a fine group of people who socialize because many of the locals are androids. It is kind of scary to see people like this and I'm wondering if something in the environment has poisoned their brains, and I'm serious.

Please, give STL Transplants a try. There are some local people in the group that will be friendly and many outsiders. Also, try some "Meet Up" groups.

It's funny, I left STL back in 2014 and some how I now have many Facebook friends from STL. I am also strongly considering moving back for career advancement reasons.

I hope this information has helped you. Please let men know.

Best Wishes!