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My husband and I and our 2 year old son currently live in Dothan, AL and are considering a move to southeastern TN within the next year. Our main motivations are that Certified Professional Midwives are legal there (not here) and we would like to find a more open minded community.
First, some questions we have...
1. What is homeschooling in TN like? Are the rules & regs restrictive?
2. What is the weather in southeastern TN like? (See below for more specific locations we're looking at.) We'd like a little snow in winter and slightly cooler summers. Here it regularly gets above 100F in the summer and never snows.
3. Is anyone familiar with any intentional communities in SE TN? Where and what are your thoughts?
We're hoping (really hard!) that we can find an area with most of the following:
small town (population under about 15k)
good job market for either engineers or college math instructors
good local hospital and university (community college also a plus)
religious & ethnic diversity
open minded/tolerant people
at least a couple of good midwives in the area
a secular homeschool group/community
low land price (we will be looking for 4-6 acres outside of city limits)
nearby intentional community
driving distance to mountains/state parks/large metro center (1-2 hours)
These are some areas we're looking at, in no particular order:
Sewanee (there is an intentional community here)
Bell Buckle
Fayetteville
Waynesboro (there is an intentional community here)
Lawrenceburg
Walden Ridge
Lewisburg
Meigs County
Info on the above locations and suggestions for others would be much appreciated!
My husband and I and our 2 year old son currently live in Dothan, AL and are considering a move to southeastern TN within the next year. Our main motivations are that Certified Professional Midwives are legal there (not here) and we would like to find a more open minded community.
First, some questions we have...
1. What is homeschooling in TN like? Are the rules & regs restrictive?
2. What is the weather in southeastern TN like? (See below for more specific locations we're looking at.) We'd like a little snow in winter and slightly cooler summers. Here it regularly gets above 100F in the summer and never snows.
3. Is anyone familiar with any intentional communities in SE TN? Where and what are your thoughts?
We're hoping (really hard!) that we can find an area with most of the following:
small town (population under about 15k)
good job market for either engineers or college math instructors
good local hospital and university (community college also a plus)
religious & ethnic diversity
open minded/tolerant people
at least a couple of good midwives in the area
a secular homeschool group/community
low land price (we will be looking for 4-6 acres outside of city limits)
nearby intentional community
driving distance to mountains/state parks/large metro center (1-2 hours)
These are some areas we're looking at, in no particular order:
Sewanee (there is an intentional community here)
Bell Buckle
Lewisburg
Meigs County
Waynesboro (there is an intentional community here)
Lawrenceburg
Walden Ridge
Info on the above locations and suggestions for others would be much appreciated!
I think the best choice listed here is Sewanee. Sewanee has a university, is a bit wealthier, and has a small hospital. It's probably a little more diverse (due to the university) than the other places. It's about an hour from Chattanooga and an hour and a half from Nashville. The challenge is going to be finding a job you can make ends meet on that far from a city.
Some of your desires conflict. Most of the small towns in Tenneseee don't have good job markets nor are they particularly ethnically and religiously diverse - you need to move to the bigger cities for that. A lack of diversity doesn't make them bad, but these communities are often set in their ways, and I would be wary about moving to a tiny place like Bell Buckle and upsetting the apple cart.
Thanks for the response! We fully understand that low population + diversity/jobs doesn't happen a lot, which is why we are also looking at intentional communities and the possibility of commuting to a larger metro area for work.
Right now we live in a city with a population close to 70,000 and don't find it tolerant enough. I believe that part of the reason for that is the location and culture here. Being around open minded people is really important to us, and we are willing to consider giving up aspects of our rural life to have that need met. Just being optimistic right now in that we may find a nice balance somewhere.
We plan to eek out a living in a camper at first (while we build) if we are not residing in an intentional community (and maybe even if we are?). We do not plan to rent or buy a home, we plan to buy land and build a home. We would be looking for rural, no restrictions land for around $15,000. I have not looked into how land prices compare, but we bought 4 wooded acres here for $9k.
We do anti-circumcision activism, and have been met with extreme reactions here. Like, we've lost friends over it. We aren't Christians, but our beliefs aren't something we really advertise anyway. Though I am admittedly a little sick of living in a "We're all Christians and we're assuming you are too" area. We're just monotheists, we don't adhere to any specific religion. I guess we'd like general tolerance...of interracial couples, alternate lifestyles, divergent opinions, etc. Just would like to be around other people who don't care what you do as long as it doesn't interfere with their lives. "Live and let live."
We want to go visit some places in the next few months.
For years I have told people that this is a live and let live state and that while this state is predominantly Christian you will be fine no matter your beliefs. Recently I was shocked to learn that a work acquaintance that I thought very happy here was moving away. The reason given was "for a better opportunity". After she left I learned that the real reason she left was because she was atheist; and while everyone was polite to her she felt that she never really fit in. She felt that her children never really fit in. So, I hope that helps explain. You will be treated politely most likely. But, you may never feel like you fit in.
Earlier this summer I was in Seattle and was blown away by the vibe there vs here in Tennessee. Now THAT is a place that is truly live and let live.
Homeschooling varies from community to community so it will depend. Midwives, well, just because they are legal in TN doesn't mean that there's a bunch of them or that they are embraced by the medical community. I am not saying this to debate them but giving you a realistic viewpoint. (it is what it is)
The weather; you will probably not see any snow or only a few flakes that melt quickly at best. Humidity is more of a problem in the summer than high temps. Fall and spring are heavenly.
I've been on this board for over 6 years now and can tell you the stories of the happy and unhappy. Ask away and best of luck in your search. We're glad you're here and hope we can be of help.
The one thing about your post, OP, that makes me pause is that you say you are anti-circumcision ACTIVISTS.
Personally, I don't care what cause you believe in, but when you self-identify as activists, I immediately wonder if truly want a tolerant environment or if you just want people to live and let YOU live.
Do you know what I mean? Are you "active" with your cause daily, challenging people to take it up? Do you talk about it every chance you get, or is it more subtle?
We plan to eek out a living in a camper at first (while we build) if we are not residing in an intentional community (and maybe even if we are?). We do not plan to rent or buy a home, we plan to buy land and build a home. We would be looking for rural, no restrictions land for around $15,000. I have not looked into how land prices compare, but we bought 4 wooded acres here for $9k.
We do anti-circumcision activism, and have been met with extreme reactions here. Like, we've lost friends over it. We aren't Christians, but our beliefs aren't something we really advertise anyway. Though I am admittedly a little sick of living in a "We're all Christians and we're assuming you are too" area. We're just monotheists, we don't adhere to any specific religion. I guess we'd like general tolerance...of interracial couples, alternate lifestyles, divergent opinions, etc. Just would like to be around other people who don't care what you do as long as it doesn't interfere with their lives. "Live and let live."
We want to go visit some places in the next few months.
If you move in the winter, you might be able to live in a camper, but it wouldn't be very pleasant. Southern TN can get below freezing and see the occasional snowflake (but usually no major accumulation). Moving to a state with a tough job market like TN and planning to "eek out a living in a camper" is a recipe for failure.
I just did a quick look on land in Bell Buckle - I don't think you will find land near the town as cheap as you want. I found nearly seven acres for $51k, which was one of the best acres per dollar value I found.
The fact that you're an activist and getting "extreme reactions" seems to me that you're "in your face" about this. I don't think you're going to notice a major culture change between TN and AL in this regard. The towns you mentioned likely aren't going to have many divergent opinions, interracial couples, or alternate lifestyles. These areas are mostly white and probably mostly Baptist with the rest being some sort of Protestant and a sprinkling of Catholics here and there. This doesn't mean they are bad places, but they are what they are, and it sounds like your values may upset the local community.
Tennessee is more tolerant than I found it growing up as a teenager ten years ago, but religion still plays a big part in daily life for a lot of people here. You may be cordially invited to church by a colleague or occasionally run into proselytizers with very strong opinions. I know that I've personally felt left out or even occasionally badgered because I'm not religious here in the Tri-Cities, which is a much larger community than the ones you're considering.
Honestly, I think it's going to be "six or half a dozen" for you between TN and AL. The areas you're considering are going to be relatively similar to AL culturally and I don't see the point of relocating, trying to find jobs again, etc, to move to a place relatively similar to your own. It also seems you conflict culturally with the values of the places you're considering. I'd look into other areas.
Your looking in rural/small town areas and considering your wants and needs, it is going to be an issue. Jobs and the live-and-let-live attitude is more prevalent in places like Nashville, Memphis, Knoxville and Chattanooga. I think you're going to have to find another state because what you want isn't going to mesh up, and neither does your budget.
Thanks Beretta. On the homeschooling issue we're really just wondering about how the state laws affect homeschooling families, as the laws are different than they are here. But I'm certain we would be able to find a midwife, because even here there are some midwives who fly under the radar. And I kind of have this fantasy that we could live close enough to The Farm to deliver there, haha.
It is disheartening to hear that even in larger metros we may still feel "left out." But I half expected that anyway, and that's a major motivator for seeking out an intentional community. Leaving the south altogether is not an option for us until DH finishes his degree.
We've lived through winters here (which aren't quite as cold) with no heating whatsoever, and we currently thrive on about $1000/month. I'm really not worried about surviving financially wherever we go. My husband would just prefer to get a job relevant to his degree. Right now he works part time as a CNC machinist/programmer, and changing jobs would not be a big deal. I stay at home with our son.
I guess I should explain our activism a bit. "Activism" may conjure images of protesters shouting with big signs, but really it can be anything that a person actively does working toward a certain cause. We are definitely not "in your face;" we set up informational booths at local health expos and such. We talk about it to people only when it comes up in conversation. I share links to relevant studies on my Facebook page. Like seriously, people are just super closed off about the issue and we do have to walk on eggshells. But we do the work we do because, after researching for nearly 2 years and some experiences of our own, we feel the information we're providing is stuff parents and others need to hear, they won't get it anywhere else if they aren't looking for it, and they don't feel like they need to research it. I'm definitely not getting into a debate about it on this forum, but I will say it is a human rights issue (according to applicable US law and the Declaration of Human Rights) and causes irreparable damage to a non-consenting infant. Our activism is not about being able to say/do whatever we want or make other people think what we do. It's about protecting the bodily integrity of infants.
Is there nowhere in TN where we might find some of what we're looking for? If not, we may just stick it out here until DH finishes his degree. Maybe then we could leave this region altogether.
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