Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > World Forums > Canada > Toronto
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 12-15-2011, 08:22 AM
 
Location: Northern Ontario, Canada
230 posts, read 533,116 times
Reputation: 352

Advertisements

One thing I want to point out: everyone in TO seems to have a ridiculous and irrational hatred of Quebec and its people, but throughout my many, many visits and extended stays in Montreal, as well as my four years at a Quebec university, I felt the most at ease there. It is MUCH easier to strike up a conversation with a stranger and ESPECIALLY the women in Montreal and anywhere else in La Belle Province. Come to think of it - and I've never really considered this before until now - Quebecers are much more American in many ways than English Canada. No wonder they want to separate!
Quick reply to this message

 
Old 12-20-2011, 07:02 PM
 
4 posts, read 17,637 times
Reputation: 20
Basically, everyone in Toronto evaluate what benefit they can gain by being your friend/Gf/Bf/wife/husband. Assuming you are charming, talkative, social and funny, THAT in itself is a benefit to those you're befriending and a FIRST STEP to becoming their friend. Then comes your job (if you can score them some Hockey tickets/able to buy rounds of beer, etc), then your car (if you can drive them somewhere) and finally your location, where you live (whether you live in a house or a fancy condo downtown for future plans of throwing a party at your place).

Multiply this transaction by X10 and you'll get the requirements for interacting/ATTRACTING women in Toronto. In fact scratch funny/charming/talkative and just go straight to YOUR JOB, CAR, LOCATION/CONDO and you've got the secret to Toronto women.

There you have it: MAKING FRIENDS IN T.O 101 and a bonus: ATTRACTING TORONTO WOMEN 101.

So....stop being in denial, either accept it and be a zombie like the rest of us OR be original, smart with a mix of LUCK and GET THE HELL OUTTA THIS CITY ASAP!

Cheers
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-20-2011, 11:42 PM
 
126 posts, read 555,346 times
Reputation: 213
I don't see Torontonians as being so calculating. Then again, I know very few people here. My impression is more along the lines of this blog I discovered recently: POINT SYSTEM: Pathetic Toronto Dating and Social Culture. - Living in the DEAD city People are basically afraid of getting close to people not already in their social circle. As a result, I think most people's group of friends don't change much from the people they went to school with.

Last edited by sunshineleith; 12-21-2011 at 08:35 AM.. Reason: .
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-24-2011, 01:53 PM
 
273 posts, read 781,081 times
Reputation: 171
All of this TO bashing is still suspicious for me. Keeping an open mind about the posts in this thread, I just can't seem to find myself agreeing with anything. I can agree with TO being corporate, but I'm not a corporate guy who hangs out on King st. Most of my friends are artists and musicians, and not rich by any means. The mentality we have dictates the way we hang out, and I meet new friends and girls all the time. With women, it's perfectly normal to get rejected, especially if you're meeting them at bars or clubs. When a girl rejects me, I just shrug my attempts off with a sense of humour and move on with life.

The above blog that was posted oozes with depression and isolation, and it worries me. It's a little bit extreme. Maybe this individual was rejected by a massive B*t*h and can't get over it or was badly hurt, or maybe there are other issues. Therefore, I'm not willing to assume that it's the city which has these problems, but the individual. I have a buddy from Australia who came to TO knowing no one and now being three years later, he loves it and doesn't want to leave.

I'm just trying to make sense of the extreme negativity in this thread.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 06:47 PM
 
126 posts, read 555,346 times
Reputation: 213
Quote:
Originally Posted by a_jordania View Post
All of this TO bashing is still suspicious for me. Keeping an open mind about the posts in this thread, I just can't seem to find myself agreeing with anything. I can agree with TO being corporate, but I'm not a corporate guy who hangs out on King st. Most of my friends are artists and musicians, and not rich by any means. The mentality we have dictates the way we hang out, and I meet new friends and girls all the time. With women, it's perfectly normal to get rejected, especially if you're meeting them at bars or clubs. When a girl rejects me, I just shrug my attempts off with a sense of humour and move on with life.

The above blog that was posted oozes with depression and isolation, and it worries me. It's a little bit extreme. Maybe this individual was rejected by a massive B*t*h and can't get over it or was badly hurt, or maybe there are other issues. Therefore, I'm not willing to assume that it's the city which has these problems, but the individual. I have a buddy from Australia who came to TO knowing no one and now being three years later, he loves it and doesn't want to leave.

I'm just trying to make sense of the extreme negativity in this thread.
Here is what explains what you call the "extreme negativity in this thread": Toronto.

But let me say that I misspoke when wrote that people's friends don't change much from the people they went to school with. It changes, but it's almost always through people their friends know. In this sense, people here can be friendly, especially in certain circles. What is extraordinary is the paucity of spontaneous interactions between two strangers in public settings. This is not an extraordinary accident; people are simply indisposed to interact with stangers, and you can see this in their visages as you walk around here. In this sense, Toronto has to be the most unfriendly city in North America.

About women, the number of men on the web testifying that women in Toronto are different is one reason to not attribute any particular man's complaints to his supposed idiosyncrasies. (I won't post any links now, but I have before.) The fact is that it is very difficult to meet women except through your social circle.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 08:55 PM
 
701 posts, read 1,028,835 times
Reputation: 373
Quote:
Originally Posted by a_jordania View Post
All of this TO bashing is still suspicious for me. Keeping an open mind about the posts in this thread, I just can't seem to find myself agreeing with anything. I can agree with TO being corporate, but I'm not a corporate guy who hangs out on King st. Most of my friends are artists and musicians, and not rich by any means. The mentality we have dictates the way we hang out, and I meet new friends and girls all the time. With women, it's perfectly normal to get rejected, especially if you're meeting them at bars or clubs. When a girl rejects me, I just shrug my attempts off with a sense of humour and move on with life.

The above blog that was posted oozes with depression and isolation, and it worries me. It's a little bit extreme. Maybe this individual was rejected by a massive B*t*h and can't get over it or was badly hurt, or maybe there are other issues. Therefore, I'm not willing to assume that it's the city which has these problems, but the individual. I have a buddy from Australia who came to TO knowing no one and now being three years later, he loves it and doesn't want to leave.

I'm just trying to make sense of the extreme negativity in this thread.
My guess is it's a few lonely people trying to blame an entire city for their own personal situations. It's easier to take if it's not one's fault.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-01-2012, 08:56 AM
 
3,059 posts, read 8,244,374 times
Reputation: 3281
Quote:
Originally Posted by a_jordania View Post
All of this TO bashing is still suspicious for me. Keeping an open mind about the posts in this thread, I just can't seem to find myself agreeing with anything. I can agree with TO being corporate, but I'm not a corporate guy who hangs out on King st. Most of my friends are artists and musicians, and not rich by any means. The mentality we have dictates the way we hang out, and I meet new friends and girls all the time. With women, it's perfectly normal to get rejected, especially if you're meeting them at bars or clubs. When a girl rejects me, I just shrug my attempts off with a sense of humour and move on with life.

The above blog that was posted oozes with depression and isolation, and it worries me. It's a little bit extreme. Maybe this individual was rejected by a massive B*t*h and can't get over it or was badly hurt, or maybe there are other issues. Therefore, I'm not willing to assume that it's the city which has these problems, but the individual. I have a buddy from Australia who came to TO knowing no one and now being three years later, he loves it and doesn't want to leave.

I'm just trying to make sense of the extreme negativity in this thread.
I completely agree with you. I know many people that love Toronto and think the people are great. Being a Maritimer I never found it particularly friendly myself (tough to top the Maritimes or Newfoundland for friendliness) but the extreme negativity seems unbalanced. To each his own I guess.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-02-2012, 11:22 AM
 
Location: Northern Ontario, Canada
230 posts, read 533,116 times
Reputation: 352
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leaving on a Jet Plane View Post
What is extraordinary is the paucity of spontaneous interactions between two strangers in public settings. This is not an extraordinary accident; people are simply indisposed to interact with stangers, and you can see this in their visages as you walk around here. In this sense, Toronto has to be the most unfriendly city in North America.
I couldn't agree more. This is my real problem with the place. Even coming from a region of the US that is considered very reserved I still have a very hard time coming to terms with the idea that in Toronto you simply do not talk to strangers, period. Even in the workplace I've noticed a real hesitancy to smile or even acknowledge people who don't work in your department. Yes, there are exceptions, but in general that's just the way it is.

To echo other people's concerns, this is what makes Toronto so depressing. It's not that you can't make friends; inevitably this ends up happening and everyone more or less finds a niche after a while. It's the lack of friendly interaction between strangers that is nonexistent, and if you're not from here it totally throws you off. You find yourself missing it and craving it and occasionally attempting it, only to be given the cold shoulder.

Last edited by ajl22586; 01-02-2012 at 11:24 AM.. Reason: Need to revise for clarity.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-05-2012, 09:09 PM
 
126 posts, read 555,346 times
Reputation: 213
Quote:
Originally Posted by ajl22586 View Post
I couldn't agree more. This is my real problem with the place. Even coming from a region of the US that is considered very reserved I still have a very hard time coming to terms with the idea that in Toronto you simply do not talk to strangers, period. Even in the workplace I've noticed a real hesitancy to smile or even acknowledge people who don't work in your department. Yes, there are exceptions, but in general that's just the way it is.

To echo other people's concerns, this is what makes Toronto so depressing. It's not that you can't make friends; inevitably this ends up happening and everyone more or less finds a niche after a while. It's the lack of friendly interaction between strangers that is nonexistent, and if you're not from here it totally throws you off. You find yourself missing it and craving it and occasionally attempting it, only to be given the cold shoulder.
I personally think this way of living is not fully human. I for one can't get used to it.

Sometime last year I came accross this interesting blog which accurately describes what it is like here: Jogging…part I. « Sisyphus (As he implies, women's exterior -- especially their lack of eye contact -- suggets that they're far more reluctant to engage with strangers than men are.)
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2012, 12:53 PM
 
2 posts, read 6,136 times
Reputation: 11
This worries me as a guy who was thinking about moving from MI to Toronto after college. I want to work in IT up there but all I see is how extraodinarily expensive this place is, how stuck up the women are, and how hard it is to make friends. I would love that big city feel but not if I'm alone and depressed!

Is everyone in Toronto really just a upity business snob who has no time for friends/hanging out outside of the people they grew up with in college?
Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


 
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:
Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > World Forums > Canada > Toronto

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top