Tyler, TX - Too conservative for my family? (Houston, Dallas: violent crime, landscaping)

[lilypad]

In these small very conservative enclaves, you will never be accepted completely unless you belong to a traditional church group. I was surprised after being away from Texas for several years, when I came back was consistently asked two questions: 1) Are you married? 2) What church do you attend? And asked on interviews as well! I was very taken aback and just said (mistakenly) that I do not yet have a church. "Well, dear, you are more than welcome to come with me this Sunday? How would you like that?" So now I just say, "Yes, thank you, I ALREADY have a church." Because I love Texas (take bad with the good), I am willing to go along and play the game. But stay away from the social clubs and associations.

[ratface]

Are you going to make that much money in Tyler? If above 80K a year, you can be relatively happy with neighborhoods. Need private school, security system, and lots of money for hidden costs of living in Tyler: High electric bills due to AC and very high property taxes. (We have to pay for schooling all the illegals here.....I mean it, old schools in town are mostly all hispanic.)
Over 15000 illegals is best estimate.

I am liberal too, but not when it comes to people invading our country and taking over schools, hospitals, etc. Why not come legally? Like we all did.

Your concerns about religion are real. This is 80% conservative, judgemental, southern baptist country. Many people I know, who have moved here lately, have complained about the constant pressure to conform to the evangelicals here. If you catholic, look out, most red-necks here do not think you are christian.

Hate to be so negative but this mostly bad. Yes, come here, eat at one of the few resturants that is not a burger joint, tex-mex heart stopping, or pizza place----meet some nice people who like wine and actually read newspapers and magazines-----and you will think this is not too bad. But, you are running with small part of poplulation. What is Tyler? Poor, diverse, mostly hispanic newcomers speaking spanish only; old retired people, wall marts (count up to 6) and few professionals working at hospitals and small university. Junior College is like a large high school.

Good luck and check it out....RF

[pit_crew]

Well I have been reading with much interest all about Tyler because I do have a potential job opportunity there. I may be coming for a face to face interview soon. My biggest worry is a nice home in a place with good middle school/high school. I have a 13 yr old daughter. I also own 6 APBTs that I show and will have to sell my home here(not paid for). Husbands work can easily change to the Tyler area as all the oil field companies are there just about. We are Baptist. No prob there. I am in the medical field, hopefully no prob there. Is there anything else I should know? All that I have read here seems to be positive for someone like me at least.

[love roses]

I personally love Tyler. I agree with the above poster about the illegal problem there, but I think expecting a cosmopolitan environment out of a place that was not even really a big town 10 years ago or so is a bit much. Just like many other places in Texas, like Austin, Houston, Dallas, etc....which have experienced double digit growth in a 5 yr. period, there's a lot of catching up to do for a lot of these places. Honestly, how many people from outside the state even knew Tyler existed 5+ yrs. ago?

[artsyguy]

Dallas, and Denton are the more liberal areas. Both cities have churches that openly welcome gays and lesbians. Denton is full of artists and musicians. Dallas has Unitarian Churches, areas for gays to hang out, and most judges in Dallas are democrats. The people that consider themselves conservative are usually moderate...unless you are dealing with people that go to Church of Christ or Southern Baptist churches....Good luck!

Originally Posted by AuroraSylver

My husband may be transferred to Tyler, Texas and we're struggling right now trying to decide whether he should look for another job/position or if we should make the move. We have some pros and cons to consider. The pros are that my husband's $58K per year salary plus my $26K per year salary (I telecommute, so my job travels with me) will make us able to afford a very nice home in the Tyler/Whitehouse area. There's also opportunity for advancement for my husband if we move to Tyler.

As far as I've seen in photos Tyler is a lovely city. I'm a gardener, so the azalea and rose festivals appeal to me, too. The cost of living around Tyler seems very low. I've also heard that Texans are friendly and full of Texas pride--all good things.

Here's the rub, though. I've also heard Tyler, and much of Texas in general, is very conservative and very Christian. I have nothing against either, but I'm very liberal and an agnostic (in other words, not at all religious and not open to becoming so). My husband is also liberal and a wiccan. We've taught our kids about all different religions (they even attended Lutheran Sunday school when they were younger to get a taste of their grandparents' religion), but our children are not religious, either. They're also very open and liberal in their beliefs. Neither kid has a racist bone in their bodies--seriously.

I don't want to stir up a huge controversy--Tyler is what it is, and I'm fine with that. I'm just worried that, given our beliefs, and even though we're pretty private about them, my family won't fit in there. Will my kids have trouble fitting into school when if folks ask them where they go to church and they tell them that they don't? Just how conservative is Tyler? I'm hoping my worries are unfounded, but I'd like to go in with my eyes open.

Thanks in advance!

[artsyguy]

Why go to Austin when you can go to Denton. Austin is lame....but has some good points like the hill country and hill country galleria. I don't know if there are Wicca groups there....there ARE plenty of Christian Churches there...

Originally Posted by UNT_Eagle

Hi there,
Just wanted to let you know that Tyler might not be the best place for you and you're family. You won't fit in well there. Yes, it is extremely conservative and all points around the area as well. Try Dallas, or Austin if you want to experience more of a progressive lifestyle.

[artsyguy]

This person should live in Denton....beware of denton bible church...it is almost like a cult and is conservative..

I found most people in Denton to be "out there" and "strange"...and I'm a pretty progressive person ....

Originally Posted by AuroraSylver

Thanks much for your response.

My husband and I don't usually talk about our beliefs. When questioned about religion I politely decline to discuss the topic. My husband knows all too well the stereotypes associated with his religious beliefs. It's just like you said--people see wicca as devil worship instead of the earth-centered religion that it is. It's difficult to convince people otherwise, so we don't try. We have live-and-let-live attitudes and just hope folks will give us the same consideration.

[artsyguy]

Texas isn't THAT conservative. It has areas that are real progressive and liberal. People that consider themselves conservative Christian are usually laid back about their beliefs anyways.....they might talk up a big front but they don't mean it. ....

Originally Posted by Canine*Castle

Shocked that the Bible Belt and Texas being stated as "so conservative" had so many groups such as these.

[UNT_Eagle]

Originally Posted by artsyguy

This person should live in Denton....beware of denton bible church...it is almost like a cult and is conservative..

I found most people in Denton to be "out there" and "strange"...and I'm a pretty progressive person ....

Hey there,

please don't paint such a broad brush regarding that particular church. Just because it's conservative and not in line with your "progressive" thinking doesn't mean it's all bad.

There are some great folks that go there.

Take care

[artsyguy]

The people of Denton Bible church would ostricize and reject the OP for sure. It's just way too old fashioned of a church culture imo. Other than that the city is pretty weird...like Austin used to be.

Originally Posted by UNT_Eagle

Hey there,

please don't paint such a broad brush regarding that particular church. Just because it's conservative and not in line with your "progressive" thinking doesn't mean it's all bad.

There are some great folks that go there.

Take care