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Old 02-11-2014, 06:37 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
16,224 posts, read 23,667,224 times
Reputation: 24067

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My EX husband who I was married to for almost 15 yrs. passed away about 2 weeks ago!!
It was not expected. He died of a massive heart attack, in his home, alone. What a shocker!!!
Anyway, I need for him to come to me, and let me know somehow that he made it, and he is ok!
Whether this is through a dream, or something else, I`m not going to rest in peace for his soul until he sends me a sign!
We have always talked about this, when we were married, about whoever reached the other side first, to let the other one know somehow, that they were ok.
Where is he? Why isn`t he letting me know anything? Is he stuck, since he died so instantly? Does he realize that he is dead?
Help!!!! My son is only 15, and he and his Dad were best of friends too, so he is in denial that he is gone.
How can we reach him, just to get the chance to say goodbye? Some say....just talk to him like he is sitting there with you. I tried that, and I honestly don`t feel any fibe, or a hint of him even being around us at all. I must say goodbye, and chat a few min. I wasn`t ready for him to die!!!!!!!

So...yeah, I`m a little crazy these days since he passed, but I had some things left unsaid that I needed to say. He was too young too die!! 58

Last edited by yankeegirl313; 02-11-2014 at 06:59 PM..
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Old 02-11-2014, 08:35 PM
 
808 posts, read 604,512 times
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I am sorry for your loss.

Pray for him. Together with the son.
Have Masses offered for him - a lot.
Then you might be allowed to have contact.
It is not that simple and not everybody has it.
You have to have faith and not desire only.
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Old 02-11-2014, 10:28 PM
 
Location: Under the Redwoods
3,751 posts, read 6,774,186 times
Reputation: 6078
The harder you look, the harder it will be to find.
I lost someone suddenly, they were actually just a missing person for nearly 5 years, but even thought I knew he was dead, there was that notion that he could still be alive.
I wanted and waited for a sign from him. It can take a while, and then again, he may have already done so and you may have missed it or not recognized it.
Some of the more common things that the dead use to communicate are birds, butterflies/moths, and coins.
This website expands upon these things.
In the mean time, talk to him, aloud. Be patient, it will happen.
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Old 02-12-2014, 01:24 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles
7,008 posts, read 8,714,925 times
Reputation: 8789
I feel,and understand your sorrow.
I felt the same when my partner passed.
Fortunately I found a way to contact him 3 months after he passed.
This was many years ago, but I have benefited from the knowledge I have gained about death and the spiritual world.
What I have learned about death, and spirits moving on has, I believe, given me a different perspective here in this human existence.
I have learned that spirits who were not ready to be called home,as a result of the human passing unexpectedly, often remain in a limbo state.
They are at a point where they can't return to this plain,nor are they capable of moving on to the world of spirits.
One day(and we humans are unable to know when)other spirits will help, and guide his spirit , and free it from this state of limbo.
This being in limbo is not unusual among spirits, especially when they had to give up a human existence abruptly.
I doubt contact with his spirit will happen until such time that other spirits lead his spirit home.
That will happen, but you need to be patient.
The journey home could happen today, tomorrow, or many years from now.
What I would offer in the meantime would be for you to remember him for who he was when he was here.
Think of him often, but do not let it become an obsession.
Go about your life, and "live" your life.
Were I you, I would devote some time in my day to try and contact him.
The possibility is very real that he may have contacted you already, but you were oblivious to the signs.
So the obvious question would be, "What signs"?
"How would I know the sign is from him, and not from some other source?"
In the spiritual world, many signs are universal, while many others are on a personal level.
It has been my experience that the personal signs are the first ones I recognize.
Obviously the two of you shared years together, and some of those little personal things you shared together are things that you, as well as his spirit, remember.
Spend time thinking about some of those things.
The energy, and vibes you put forth when thinking are many times "picked up" by spirits.
Believe strongly that when the time is right, you will have contact with his spirit, but do not be saddened if it doesn't happen quickly.
We humans have this insatiable appetite for we want it now, not later.
We (especially when dealing with spirits) need to learn patience, and that things don't always happen in "our time".
In the world of spirits there is no such thing as time, life is infinity.
Having been through what you are now experiencing, I reached out, but I was not alone in my quest.
I mentioned "signs, and how they could be there without so much as a glimmer of understanding when these signs appear.
Case in point; When my partner passed twenty two years ago, I was devastated.
Unlike your former husband, my partner had been sick for some time, and I was made aware his passing would be soon.
Even though I had time to prepare myself for the loss, I still had a tough time of it.
At this point in my life, I had never given any thought to life after death, and it wasn't until two months after his death that he sent me a sign that at the time I was completely unaware of.
It was only a month or so later that I realized the significance of the sign he gave me.
What was that sign that I was completely oblivious too?
I had some friends over the house one evening after his death, and one asked if I believed in life after death.
As I stated, I never gave it a thought.
Well this friend during the conversation suggested I go to the book store and purchase a book titled, "Life After Life" by an author named Raymond Moody.
A few days later, I did, and my life has not been the same since.
Somehow, my deceased partner's spirit, somehow, arrainged for that one particular friend to be at my house that night, and to inform me about the subject of which I had no idea I would embark on.
That incident was most definitely a sign from his spirit, because my life since that time, has taken a 180* turn.
Signs come in all kinds of ways, and we surely need to look for them, and understand when they happen.
The trouble is, we don't always know when they happen.
So in closing, let me add, think of him, and do it often, but don't allow it to rule your life.
Be open to some of the things you take for granted, for some of them may indeed be a sign that he is near you.
Above all, be,and think positive.
Only good will come from that kind of attitude.
Bob.
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Old 02-12-2014, 08:10 AM
 
Location: Sinking in the Great Salt Lake
13,145 posts, read 20,502,739 times
Reputation: 14048
It's a very hard thing... the death of a close loved one is one of the most difficult things we can face in our lives.

There likely won't be a sign... but know the dead are OK wherever they are and feel sorry for us, as we are the ones in a dark, hard spot and they are finally free.

My grandma promised me she would come and tell me what's what after she died if she could; she never showed up as a ghost but I DID have a really amazing dream where she told me what I just told you. It could have just been a dream, but who knows?

In the end, the challenge for us living folks is to come to terms with the loss and make our own peace with it. I hope things go well for you and your family, yankeegirl.
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Old 02-12-2014, 11:21 AM
 
Location: Tennessee
16,224 posts, read 23,667,224 times
Reputation: 24067
Thank you for the encouraging words!

I will try those suggestions and try to not to let it remain the most important thing in my life right now!
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Old 02-12-2014, 02:18 PM
 
Location: Jacksonville, Fl
1,279 posts, read 1,553,518 times
Reputation: 2495
Quote:
Originally Posted by yankeegirl313 View Post
My EX husband who I was married to for almost 15 yrs. passed away about 2 weeks ago!!
It was not expected. He died of a massive heart attack, in his home, alone. What a shocker!!!
Anyway, I need for him to come to me, and let me know somehow that he made it, and he is ok!
Whether this is through a dream, or something else, I`m not going to rest in peace for his soul until he sends me a sign!
We have always talked about this, when we were married, about whoever reached the other side first, to let the other one know somehow, that they were ok.
Where is he? Why isn`t he letting me know anything? Is he stuck, since he died so instantly? Does he realize that he is dead?
Help!!!! My son is only 15, and he and his Dad were best of friends too, so he is in denial that he is gone.
How can we reach him, just to get the chance to say goodbye? Some say....just talk to him like he is sitting there with you. I tried that, and I honestly don`t feel any fibe, or a hint of him even being around us at all. I must say goodbye, and chat a few min. I wasn`t ready for him to die!!!!!!!

So...yeah, I`m a little crazy these days since he passed, but I had some things left unsaid that I needed to say. He was too young too die!! 58
I have to ask, given the sentiment of your post here, why you guys broke up?

I would suggest going to a place that was very special to both of you. Some place that yielded a staple mark for your relationship and then taking a nap there and let your mind be clear. He will send you a message I bet.

I lost someone very very close to me a few years ago. She was truly my soul mate in every regard. She was an incredible woman. She died from cancer. One day while driving home late, I got this overwhelming feeling to drive by her old home. I don't why I did, but I drove over and parked my car and just sat at the end of the long driveway. After a while I got out and walked to where there was a brick retaining wall with grass. We had often made out there early on in our relationship and even had sex there a few times. I laid back on the grass and fell asleep. I had vivid dreams of her in space, over the top of me and smiling. I could see her and it was real.
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Old 02-12-2014, 02:23 PM
 
Location: Consciousness
659 posts, read 1,047,736 times
Reputation: 839
My condolences, maybe reciting this prayer will help:

O my God! This is Thy servant and the son of Thy servant who hath believed in Thee and in Thy signs, and set his face towards Thee, wholly detached from all except Thee. Thou art, verily, of those who show mercy the most merciful.
Deal with him, O Thou Who forgivest the sins of men and concealest their faults, as beseemeth the heaven of Thy bounty and the ocean of Thy grace. Grant him admission within the precincts of Thy transcendent mercy that was before the foundation of earth and heaven. There is no God but Thee, the Ever-Forgiving, the Most Generous.

Let him, then, repeat six times the greeting “Alláh-u-Abhá,”

and then repeat nineteen times each of the following verses:
We all, verily, worship God.
We all, verily, bow down before God.
We all, verily, are devoted unto God.
We all, verily, give praise unto God.
We all, verily, yield thanks unto God.
We all, verily, are patient in God.

~Bahá’u’lláh
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Old 02-12-2014, 03:05 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
16,224 posts, read 23,667,224 times
Reputation: 24067
Well...I think we put each other on the back burner, after we had a child. We both put our heart and soul into him, and after having it just the two of us for so long, and going through a lot of pain and emotion because we couldn`t have a child, once we did get him, it was a lot different.
I don`t know.
It doesn`t really matter why we broke up. What matters is we remained good friends after the divorce, and still respected each other, etc.
I know that he has always wanted to get back together.
Could it be he died of a broken heart? I have heard about this, and have wondered.

Also..we couldn`t find his wedding band from when we were married. He probably pawned it.

Last edited by yankeegirl313; 02-12-2014 at 03:41 PM..
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Old 02-12-2014, 06:33 PM
 
3,978 posts, read 3,807,210 times
Reputation: 2221
Were you in a relationship when he died? He pawned the ring? Did he have financial issue?
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