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I lived in all three and have only not been lonely in the burbs, due to moments in my life. I grew up in the burbs so not lonely them. I had my family and tons of friends until I left for college. First job was in a small town and was lonely for a while, but made friends. I then moved far away for a job to a big city and was probably the loneliest I ever felt. But, I made friends and had fun for years. I live in the burbs again with my family, so not lonely, but I am still super socially sctive, in a different way. A lot of house parties with whole families attending...at least one a weekend. So, I guess, based on my experiences, it is big city for me, although I love big cities.
I live in a coastal town 20 minutes from a mid-sized city. It's definitely suburban, but no way a suburb of that city. I don't consider it lonely.
Rural, and true small towns definitely feel more lonely though. My old town had close to the same population but was way spread out and neighbors didn't talk as much and kids in the small town were way more clicky.
In some small towns, you can feel like an 'outsider' 30 years out.
When I lived in the city, I/we didn't have kids, yet we didn't know our neighbors either. This is two different cities.
I've lived in several suburban neighborhoods, some more social than others. When the kids were younger, we knew a lot of people first through a babysitting co-op, then with school and sports activities. We still socialize with some of the neighbors, even though the kids are grown.
Suburbia for most of my life. You can be social if you choose to be. Neighbors even. And when you're older with kids you have your kids' friends' parents to socialize with, if you choose to. I find that most of these parents are willing because parenting is a good thing to have in common. Can't imagine it to be anywhere near possible if rural.
I can relate. I like big urban cities because it IS easier to have lots of interactions with people. Those random interactions aren't a replacement for actual relationships, but it DOES make me feel more connected. I have found it more difficult to experience those sorts of interactions in a quieter, more suburban in form neighborhood, in part just because there are simply fewer people out on the street, and fewer people at the bus stop. I really do better in a more bustling neighborhood because that activity -- informal and whenever you step outside your door or look out the window -- makes me feel less lonely. I know that those same neighborhoods can make others feel drained or exhausted, while for me, those quiet neighborhoods, however nice the neighbors and however many block parties they may have, leave me feeling more isolated and lonely.
What kind of lifestyle do you think tends to be the most lonely?
Any of the above.
[there are lonely people everywhere]
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