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I'm guessing that you didn't read through the whole post. I did a tremendous amount of research before moving to Utah Valley...Every time I encountered a negative post about what it was like living in Utah Valley as a non-mormon the op was attacked as being over sensitive, wearing their feelings on their shoulders, balderdash, basically everything you and ChrisC are saying. In my open minded midwestern heart I thought "OK seriously, how bad can it be"!!! I started this post to get my experiences out there so that rational people who are researching the area will have more information to draw from, that is why the original post asks that I just be allowed to share my experiences without being attacked.
ChrisC
I am glad that you don't care, good for you it is nice to know that some people can play along to get along. I don't think that comparing LDS to a coven of witches is very appropriate or helpful and I don't remeber antone but you calling them all stuck up, jerks or horrible people. Is it possible you have your posts confused and you meant to post in another forum? if so, I hope you find it and post appropriate remarks there.
... I don't remeber antone but you calling them all stuck up, jerks or horrible people. ... coven of witches ...
Cycle
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cycle
The truth is, be very careful if you are non-lds ... have neighbors who speak to you ... would like to have your existence acknowledged. ... I am treated as if I don’t exist ... people are outright rude to me ... won’t acknowledge me ... won’t apologize for being inconsiderate ... are basically very uncivilized to me ... the rudeness I am treated with ... It is so pervasive that it is tangible.
... when they realized we were Catholics and were going to church in another city, we never received another wave even when we waved at them, nobody would walk to the end of their driveway ... they turn their backs and go into their houses ... walking the other direction they cross the street. ... had a full park and every single time, within five minutes of our arrival everyone leaves, not just some but all ... None of the children in the neighborhood will play with ours, NONE ... after living in this community for almost eight months he has not made a single friend in our neighborhood...
... birthday party ... NOT ONE SINGLE CHILD came ... NOT ONE, not a single phone call giving regrets, nothing at all no response, no apologies for not showing up everyone just pretended like it never happened ...never in my life have I encountered such uncivilized behavior ... for the last month my son has come home upset every day trying to figure out ways to record the ‘other’ boys at lunch because at least 20 boys chase him and his non-lds friend around the playground threatening to beat them up and cussing at them ...
My fifteen year old went three months without anyone of the other teens in our neighborhood talking to him ...
My kids will go out on the trampoline while the other kids are on theirs and they will laugh and play and try to get the other kids to come over and they get ignored every single time ... when my kids go to the play area across the street when other kids are out, those other kids go home, ... And yes, it is the LDS issue, my husband works with lds people and he gets along with all of them, but they always joke with him about his bad choice in where we live by saying “I’m LDS and even I wouldn’t live down there, those LDS people in Utah Valley are crazy”. ... I could go on and on, ...
Read through your (condensed) comments above. You're right, you didn't use the word "jerk." You didn't use the phrase "horrible people." You didn't have to. You used about ten paragraphs to act in absentia of "jerks" and "horrible people." You didn't say "horrible people" because you painted an even darker picture. From a casual read of your words, I'd conclude that the people to which you refer are WORSE than a coven of witches.
What you're essentially doing is stating that 500,000 people are (insert your paragraphs) and you are a victim of these 500,000 people. You were a white sheep among the 500,000 black sheep who only inhabit Utah Valley (the sheep are different elsewhere). I will simply state that I believe yours to be an inaccurate picture. I'll leave it at that.
Cycle, I'm sorry you have experienced negativity. =( I am a non LDS transplant, also from the midwest (Ohio, of course lol) , but I live in the SLV. I love it here in Utah. My DD, who is 6 & in k's best friend is our neighbor. Their family is very LDS. We are very open though. My neighbor teased me even when I gave the missionaries water on a hot day last summer. She's way cool w/ me not being LDS. I even 'scolded' her I was just trying to be nice to the missionaries. She's like 'you know you just want them to leave'. lol I told her they really don't bother me at all. She said I'm nicer to them than she is. lol
It's all in the people you meet. =) All the LDS neighbors here are nice. Hubby was even invited to be a den leader for scouts at church. Our experience here has been, overall, positive so far. =)
As a resident of Highland located near the mouth of American Fork Canyon I would like to tell the whole world what a wonderful place to reside, but if I did i might accidently invite all those seeking such a place to reside. Truely speaking, since September of 1996 my sweetheart of 41 years plus moved here to escape the hubbub of the bigger inner cities and we found a refuge uncommited to big city life. Located on a full acre parcel we find serenity sitting at the patio table reading the newspaper of just chatting as the evening wiles on. What a blessing to have such a wonderful place to set back and relax in a community with zest and spirit Highland Utah welcomes you within its borders. Having said these few words "there is no place like home!" and truly mean it having truly tested the waters over the past 14 plus years.....Forrest K Meeks resident of Highland
I know this is an old conversation, but I stumbled upon it while researching moving to Utah. I don't have time to read every single post, but the original story is so heartbreaking. I am an LDS convert (of 25 years), and am so horrified by what I have read here. I would never, ever treat anyone like this, nor do I know people like the ones described here! I am a native Californian, and am used to much diversity, so I realize that I don't have the background of being in a community of one type of people, but one thing I cannot stand is stuck-up people. I would have a terrible time living with such exclusive people, LDS or not. As I continue in my research on moving there, I hope to find people have softened their hearts and are extending kindness to others.
Ive lived here 15 years. Best state to me, so far. I wont leave until Ive seen it all.
I knew there were mormons when I moved here. No big deal. It is not THEIR state! It doesnt belong to them! I moved here for me and the landscape, not because of the neighbors I might have.
Im not asking to be included in their church activities, I dont care if they like me or say "hi" to me, I dont care if they want to wear 2 layers of clothes when the summer temps are 102 degrees. I dont care what they do.
I only do care when they show up on my doorstep. Ballsy, misguided, lil men think they can come onto my property and suggest that my religion is not the best one, they are always in for a treat. Thats for another thread.
There is a sense of isolation here. Some LDS will distance themselves from you. Its not a problem unless you live in a community where they outnumber everybody else and they thnk they run the place.
Ive seen it as close as Kaysville, where they threaten that their kids wont be friends with yours if they dont x y and z. Guess what, kids do just fine in Kaysville if they are not part of the church.
To me, Utah is the state I make it. I know what things are out there for me to see and do. If I dont enjoy this state for any reason, it is my fault.
OTOH, there is isolation that is generally swept under the rug with a few nice words.
A word of advice to the OP, move, if their opinion really means that much to you......or.......chill on your front porch every Sunday morning with a stiff bloody mary, chain smoking as you watch the parade to church.
Its not their state. They populate like mad because they know they are losing their grip.
Utah is what you make of it, dont blame anybody else if you had a bad time.
Ive lived here 15 years. Best state to me, so far. I wont leave until Ive seen it all.
I knew there were mormons when I moved here. No big deal. It is not THEIR state! It doesnt belong to them!
Its not their state. They populate like mad because they know they are losing their grip.
Utah is what you make of it, dont blame anybody else if you had a bad time.
What state are you originally from?
Well you are right the state of Utah does not belong to the LDS church. Although it you knew the complete history of Utah you would know that it was founded by Mormon pioneers and that the first Governor was the church President.
So of course this is a state with many members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
Ive lived here 15 years. Best state to me, so far. I wont leave until Ive seen it all.
I knew there were mormons when I moved here. No big deal. It is not THEIR state! It doesnt belong to them! I moved here for me and the landscape, not because of the neighbors I might have.
Im not asking to be included in their church activities, I dont care if they like me or say "hi" to me, I dont care if they want to wear 2 layers of clothes when the summer temps are 102 degrees. I dont care what they do.
I only do care when they show up on my doorstep. Ballsy, misguided, lil men think they can come onto my property and suggest that my religion is not the best one, they are always in for a treat. Thats for another thread.
There is a sense of isolation here. Some LDS will distance themselves from you. Its not a problem unless you live in a community where they outnumber everybody else and they thnk they run the place.
Ive seen it as close as Kaysville, where they threaten that their kids wont be friends with yours if they dont x y and z. Guess what, kids do just fine in Kaysville if they are not part of the church.
To me, Utah is the state I make it. I know what things are out there for me to see and do. If I dont enjoy this state for any reason, it is my fault.
OTOH, there is isolation that is generally swept under the rug with a few nice words.
A word of advice to the OP, move, if their opinion really means that much to you......or.......chill on your front porch every Sunday morning with a stiff bloody mary, chain smoking as you watch the parade to church.
Its not their state. They populate like mad because they know they are losing their grip.
Utah is what you make of it, dont blame anybody else if you had a bad time.
In 20 years the people who aren't LDS will be the majority one way or the other.
What breaks my heart is that people really won't let their kids play with someone who isn't LDS. I apologize to everyone who has had a rough experience like this as an active LDS member.
It breaks my heart people could be so damn mean to others. I would say the people that exclude are the more socially awkward people that don't know how to deal with others, but that's just my opinion.
The problem is that I live in a neighborhood that isn't like this so I just assume that's the way it is everywhere else. Instead, it sounds like there are still some bad problems where some cookey mom won't let her kid's play with someone not of the dominant religion.
I know there are a lot of LDS (friends, family) people that don't even like some parts of Utah that are considered close minded. We stay for the outdoor recreation but I would like to go out and experience either Southern Cal, Oregon, or Washington for a while. Those are the only states I would really consider.
And the U.S. was originally populated by Indians. Now they are squeezed into little itty bitty towns where they can barely survive and have little of their own heritage to uphold in their communities. Who came first is not the point.
Indians have all rights and can live wherever they want. They don't pay taxes and are businessmen mostly today.
But you're welcome to leave if you feel guilty.
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