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Old 11-16-2012, 06:33 PM
 
Location: Salt Lake City
24,268 posts, read 24,818,335 times
Reputation: 11752

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wardendresden View Post
Early on in this thread (2008) someone listed the books followed by the Mormon faith. One of them is more "modern" and subject to change. That is truly interesting because the majority of the solely the Bible Chrisian faith believe that God once spoke and then shut up. It's the Bible and nothing else. I've always felt that was a bit strange. Seems like God would have a lot to say to us yet.

My wife and I are looking to retire to SE Idaho in a couple of years and I know it has a strong LDS community. Although we are both people of faith (grew up and made professions of faith in a Baptist church), we are no longer church attenders because churches have become so judgmental of "other, different" people these days. We feel it's not our place to judge OR reject anyone with whom we may not agree about their moral, political, or social views of life. If God forgave us, He can forgive anybody.
How do Mormons view and deal with those ideas? Are they accepting of and helpful to the unacceptable in our society?
I suspect that Mormons are probably about as varied in the view of and dealings with people who are "different." The Book of Mormon states: "For none of these iniquities come of the Lord; for he doeth that which is good among the children of men; and he doeth nothing save it be plain unto the children of men; and he inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; and he remembereth the heathen; andall are alike unto God, both Jew and Gentile," so it would be fair to say that this is the "official" position of the Church. Unfortunately, as with people of all faiths, we Mormons don't always practice what we preach. I'm afraid that's really about the only comment I can make without taking the thread into a religious discussion. If you read the OP, you'll understand why I've got to leave it at that.

Good luck on your retirement. As you have noted, there is a high percentage of Mormons in southeastern Idaho, so I guess you'll get to see for yourself how well we do at being non-judgmental."
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Old 11-25-2012, 10:39 PM
 
12 posts, read 44,364 times
Reputation: 51
I'll just blurt this out: I admire the LDS church. The Mormons I know walk the walk and their values don't seem to change with the weather.
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Old 01-07-2013, 06:43 AM
 
Location: Perry, UT
601 posts, read 1,752,101 times
Reputation: 374
Quote:
Originally Posted by mickey mouse is dead View Post
orphaned quote
I live in the small town part of Utah and I never really hear anyone talking about African Americans. I heard more negative or bad talk in other parts of of the US.
It's not a topic around here that people care about.
Do you think that everyone who is LDS or Republican gas to dislike black people?
And honestly not everyone who is LDS is republican or a conservative.

Last edited by SouthernBelleInUtah; 01-07-2013 at 10:02 AM..
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Old 01-07-2013, 07:12 AM
 
571 posts, read 1,072,020 times
Reputation: 1450
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katzpur View Post

I don't know. That's probably a question for you to ask them. We are probably more involved with church-related activities on a daily basis than a lot of other people. Plus, we get to know our LDS neighbors because we associate with them at church every week. I honestly don't think it's because we don't want to associate with those outside of our faith. I just think that birds of a feather flock together, as the old saying says. It works both way, too. I think there's some hesitancy on the part of both the LDS and the non-LDS to be suspicious of the other group, to wonder if they really do have anything in common and to be a little bit afraid of trying to initiate a friendship. I've known LDS people who have been afraid to take a plate of brownies over to a new non-LDS neighbor after hearing second-hand that the last time they did, the non-LDS person thought they were just trying to get their foot in the door so that they could try to convert them. What has happened to all of us that we're afraid to be neighborly or that attempts to be neighborly are misinterpreted? I don't know, but it's really sad.

I live in AZ and moved to a great neighborhood not too long ago. I realized within the first week that my community was largely Mormon. The first couple of days, people I ran into were quite friendly. However, as they soon realized that we weren't Mormon, the friendliness went out like lights.

I've never lived in an area (and I've lived in 11 states) where I am made to feel like such an outcast. I have four kids and they all play sports. At team parties it is as though I'm invisible. I don't get one hello or any type of interaction. My oldest son played football and did great at practices (my husband would show up to check on any gaps he should work on with him - he said our son was putting forth his best effort). He only got played once the whole season. Near the end of the season I found out the coach and assistants were Mormon. The few players who weren't Mormon started floating the sentiment that if you weren't Mormon, you weren't going to get played.

Like I said, I've lived everywhere and have had close friends/roommates of all backgrounds/religions/ethnicities and never had a problem.

My husband and I have both been very social all our lives and it just seems extremely weird that we're relegated to being outcasts simply because we do not share in the Mormon religion.

That being said, the Mormon religion is very active and Mormons often have large families - this leaves little time for many other things. They have little need to make new friends or extend themselves. This part I fully understand.

I also understand that this attitude may simply be unique to the ward in my area. My husband says that in college, he had a Mormon roommate and none of this was an issue - he was the nicest guy.

I admire much about Mormons - they are hardworking and have wonderful family values. However, we are now looking to move because I cannot fathom raising my kids in an area where they are ignored and made to feel like outcasts.

My kids do not have a favorable impression of the religion. They feel excluded and are well aware that beyond the "hello" at school, they are not invited to birthday parties. I've explained to them that their Mormon classmates may have such a large pool of friends from their churches that they may not be able to invite all their classmates. I certainly don't want my kids to have any kind of bias against a particular group, simply because they have felt the sting of exclusion.

Anyway, it is sad to see this going on in our day and age.

Are Mormons aware, as a whole, as to why they have the rep in some areas as being exclusionary? If so, are they actively working on remedying this view non-Mormons have of them?
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Old 01-07-2013, 08:58 AM
 
Location: Salt Lake City
24,268 posts, read 24,818,335 times
Reputation: 11752
Quote:
Originally Posted by Angelcake4 View Post
I live in AZ and moved to a great neighborhood not too long ago. I realized within the first week that my community was largely Mormon. The first couple of days, people I ran into were quite friendly. However, as they soon realized that we weren't Mormon, the friendliness went out like lights.

I've never lived in an area (and I've lived in 11 states) where I am made to feel like such an outcast. I have four kids and they all play sports. At team parties it is as though I'm invisible. I don't get one hello or any type of interaction. My oldest son played football and did great at practices (my husband would show up to check on any gaps he should work on with him - he said our son was putting forth his best effort). He only got played once the whole season. Near the end of the season I found out the coach and assistants were Mormon. The few players who weren't Mormon started floating the sentiment that if you weren't Mormon, you weren't going to get played.

Like I said, I've lived everywhere and have had close friends/roommates of all backgrounds/religions/ethnicities and never had a problem.

My husband and I have both been very social all our lives and it just seems extremely weird that we're relegated to being outcasts simply because we do not share in the Mormon religion.

That being said, the Mormon religion is very active and Mormons often have large families - this leaves little time for many other things. They have little need to make new friends or extend themselves. This part I fully understand.

I also understand that this attitude may simply be unique to the ward in my area. My husband says that in college, he had a Mormon roommate and none of this was an issue - he was the nicest guy.

I admire much about Mormons - they are hardworking and have wonderful family values. However, we are now looking to move because I cannot fathom raising my kids in an area where they are ignored and made to feel like outcasts.

My kids do not have a favorable impression of the religion. They feel excluded and are well aware that beyond the "hello" at school, they are not invited to birthday parties. I've explained to them that their Mormon classmates may have such a large pool of friends from their churches that they may not be able to invite all their classmates. I certainly don't want my kids to have any kind of bias against a particular group, simply because they have felt the sting of exclusion.

Anyway, it is sad to see this going on in our day and age.

Are Mormons aware, as a whole, as to why they have the rep in some areas as being exclusionary? If so, are they actively working on remedying this view non-Mormons have of them?
The population of Arizona is only about 6% LDS, so with 94% non-LDS it's hard for me to imagine how your kids would feel shunned. At any rate, it might just be the area you're in. I'm LDS and have lived in the Salt Lake area all my life. My husband and I lived in one neighborhood for just six months where we were treated like a couple of nobodys by members of our own ward. It was so bad that we ended up selling the house (at a loss, since we were so anxious to get out) and moving. So there are apparently exclusionary areas wherever you go.
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Old 01-07-2013, 09:08 AM
 
Location: South Jordan, Utah
7,145 posts, read 7,870,402 times
Reputation: 3249
Three years living here now, my LDS neighbors are still as friendly, our kids all play together, we wife still drinks wine on the porch, I never really hear any issues regarding religion.

My daughter fell and cut herself one day when I didn't have my car, my neighbor just hands me his keys and says "take her to the hospital, don't work about when you get home". The Children's hospital was across the valley from me, he didn't even want gas money.

Last edited by hilgi; 01-07-2013 at 09:13 AM.. Reason: addition
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Old 01-07-2013, 09:24 AM
 
571 posts, read 1,072,020 times
Reputation: 1450
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katzpur View Post
The population of Arizona is only about 6% LDS, so with 94% non-LDS it's hard for me to imagine how your kids would feel shunned. At any rate, it might just be the area you're in. I'm LDS and have lived in the Salt Lake area all my life. My husband and I lived in one neighborhood for just six months where we were treated like a couple of nobodys by members of our own ward. It was so bad that we ended up selling the house (at a loss, since we were so anxious to get out) and moving. So there are apparently exclusionary areas wherever you go.
I'm well aware of the AZ stats. East Mesa, South Gilbert and areas of Queen Creek are heavily Mormon. It may not seem plausible to you that we are, in fact, shunned, but it's hardly a whim on which I'd go through the trouble of selling my home and relocating. (A google search will easily turn up the density of LDS churches in specific zip codes - I wish I'd have done this before we bought our home.)

The point to my question is simply: does the church actively ask its members to counter this stereotype (that in some cases is true)? I was talking to some friends in Scottsdale and when I mentioned the south Gilbert area, a friend said, "why would you move there, it's all Mormon." Again, it's not that people are flat-out biased against Mormons. These exclusionary tendencies in some areas are giving the religion a bad rep. As with all groups, some stereotypes are ignored and with other stereotypes, members actively work to counter them.

I'm just curious as to whether the church is actively working to shed this rep.
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Old 01-07-2013, 09:40 AM
 
Location: Salt Lake City
24,268 posts, read 24,818,335 times
Reputation: 11752
Quote:
Originally Posted by Angelcake4 View Post
The point to my question is simply: does the church actively ask its members to counter this stereotype (that in some cases is true)? I'm just curious as to whether the church is actively working to shed this rep.
Absolutely. But what is preached from the pulpit is not always put into practice by the members. I could find you examples of sermons given by the LDS Church "First Presidency" and Apostles, telling the members to be better Christians by being genuinely friendly to all of their neighbors and associates, but admittedly there are still problems, as your post illustrates. As I said in another post on this thread...

Mormonism is probably one of the few, if not the only, Christian denomination where no matter where you live, your street address determines where you will attend church each Sunday. You're free to attend an LDS church on the other side of town, and you'll be welcomed there -- but always (even if you go there every week) as a "visitor." Your "home ward" is where your "ward family" resides. You see these people three hours every Sunday and associate with them at church functions throughout the week. You know their kids because you teach them in Sunday School and chauffeur them around to church-sponsored activities. If you're a woman, two women in your ward are assigned to drop in and visit with you every month, to pick your kids up after school in a pinch and to bring in a casserole to feed your family when you're under the weather. Whether you're a man or a woman, you will also have two men in your ward visit you on a monthly basis, to check on how you're doing and to pass any information you may ask them to on to your bishop (if you lost your job, for instance, or were going into the hospital for some surgery). Stop and think about it... If you were quite good friends with more than a hundred people within an area of just a few square blocks of your house, if your needs were being met by this wide circle of people you knew you had a lot in common with, how much effort would you put into getting to know someone who was new in your neighborhood and was not part of that group? Probably not as much effort as you should. We plead guilty. We may not have a good excuse, but it's not that we're going out of our way to shun you.
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Old 01-07-2013, 10:08 AM
 
Location: Perry, UT
601 posts, read 1,752,101 times
Reputation: 374
The majority of the population that is mean, criminal, shunning or terrorizing neighbors is not LDS and nobody cares what religion these people have.

Some neighborhoods are more welcoming than others. Everywhere. Not only in Utah and not only among LDS.

Can we have numbers that show how many LDS people actually live in AZ and where?
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Old 01-07-2013, 10:43 AM
 
Location: Mostly in my head
19,862 posts, read 60,432,320 times
Reputation: 19260
This is veering off topic again. The topic is cultural practices of LDS people. Some leeway in setting up the question is OK, but please don't go too far afield. How many live where is too far.
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