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Old 05-31-2015, 03:27 PM
 
Location: usa
890 posts, read 1,643,252 times
Reputation: 343

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I'm a 29 year old African American woman originally from a super small town in Maryland 2 hours from DC. I've been in Atlanta for 4 years and I just can't acclimate to things here. I spent a lot of time in DC during college. I miss the diversity of people and culture. I've noticed that Atlanta proper is pretty segregated and I haven't met a lot of liberals here(meaning more than just voting democrat). I'm pretty progressive with my values and gay friendly. I do like how there are many activities for African Americans, such as different types of concerts and many professional types like me. However, I just haven't seem to really fit in. So I have been thinking long and hard about moving to DC to be closer to family. My parents suggested NC as an alternative, but it's not a place where I can see myself as a single woman. I definitely will miss the lower cost of living and weather, but I am desperate to get rid of my car as it's an unnecessary expense. Public transit isn't popular here as its not practical. Do you think will DC be a good move for me?
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Old 05-31-2015, 03:38 PM
 
Location: New-Dentist Colony
5,759 posts, read 10,674,826 times
Reputation: 3952
I'm not black, but I too have lived in Atlanta as well as in DC proper (though I live in VA now). Honestly, if you didn't like it in "black Mecca," I'm not sure if DC will be any better for you. Hard to say without knowing you personally. I will say it's far easier to live in the DC area without a car than in Atlanta, and the white people here don't reek of that irritating "Southern golf douche" culture that seems to dominate there among city dwellers. Or at least did in mid-late '90s, when I lived there.

Women in general complain that all the men in DC are married or gay--obviously an exaggeration, but I think it's a "buyer's market" from the perspective of men here. I don't know if it's even moreso among African Americans--though you didn't say if you're open to dating interracially. You know the old saying: Once you go Caucasian, you need no persuasion. I'm just sayin'. (This is what I tell my Asian wife, anyway.)

As to fitting in: Depends on with whom. If you mean the DC black community, I suspect it may be a bit more socially conservative than you are. That's of course not true of everyone, but as a general rule, I think it's true, especially among middle-aged and older people. But if you mean fitting in among the diverse residents of NW DC (i.e., the part with a true mix of races and not the all-black part), then I can't see why you wouldn't.

One thing I would say for sure: Don't move till you have a job here. The cost of housing is ridiculous.
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Old 05-31-2015, 04:03 PM
 
2,081 posts, read 3,555,366 times
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Yes, it's extremely possible to live quite well without a car here, and many many people, way more than in Atlanta, do it, but the safe walkable areas with good access to public transit are the most expensive in an already very expensive city, far more expensive than Atlanta. In the areas where it is easy to live without a car (by which I mean, you can easily walk to grocery stores, other basic amenities and the Metro) you'll need to spend at least $1,000 a month for a small studio, and that's really the bottom end. If you want a 1 bedroom apartment, at least around $1,400, and many are $2,000 and up.
If you can't afford those prices, then you'll either be living with roommates or in an area where life will be difficult without a car.
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Old 05-31-2015, 04:54 PM
 
Location: usa
890 posts, read 1,643,252 times
Reputation: 343
I date interracially and I always have. I don't think I'll have problems meeting men. I'm more concerned about finding a good group of like minded people for friendship. I am definitely not moving without a job definitely. I hope that I can find a position that pays enough to afford an apartment or at least a place with a roommate(not more than 1). I wouldn't mind living outside the city as well, just as long as it's near a metro stop.
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Old 05-31-2015, 05:10 PM
 
Location: DC
2,044 posts, read 2,943,991 times
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1. You are a college educated professional woman. So you are It doesn't matter your color you will do well here.
2. It is very easy to go car free.
3. It's expensive, but for college educated professionals with experience, it pays well in this area. I don't think you will have a problem finding a job.
4. If you want a more progressive area that is diverse, there are many both in the burbs and the city. I am thinking Silver Spring or Takoma/Takoma Park may be a good fit. As somebody said NW DC sounds like a great fit. The east of the park part. As somebody stated, the actually diverse part of DC, not all black(east of the river) or all white part(West of the park) of DC. Petworth, Crestwood, Columbia Heights, Shepherd Park, etc. Basically Ward 4.

I think the area is a good fit considering what you are looking for.
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Old 05-31-2015, 08:23 PM
 
Location: east coast
2,846 posts, read 2,955,461 times
Reputation: 1971
Quote:
Originally Posted by futureATLien View Post
I miss the diversity of people and culture.

I do like how there are many activities for African Americans, such as different types of concerts and many professional types like me.

So I have been thinking long and hard about moving to DC to be closer to family.

I definitely will miss the lower cost of living and weather, but I am desperate to get rid of my car as it's an unnecessary expense. Do you think will DC be a good move for me?
The highlighted is what sticks out to me so let me address these and give your a more clear path in order to make a more leveled and educated decision.

#1- DC is a good place for professionals and I always tell my team that sometimes you may need to relocate to be closer to those who align with your goals and interests.

#2- Given that you will be attempting this transition with a job first, you will still need as much support as possible. So being as close to supporting family is essential, trust me. Just be cautious if they continuously keep pushing you to NC as you may have to read between the lines. Nothing worse than being in a place where you are unwanted. Doesn't mean you still shouldn't move, just means not to seek their advice.

#3- Given #2 you need to be as proactive as possible BUT, looking for employment opportunities in DC AS WELL as the surrounding areas and states. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

#4- don't be so quick to give up your ride. you never know where you will end up and so you may need some form of transportation.

#5- don't be afraid to take a temp job while you are in the DC area to keep yourself afloat instead of wasting time looking for a job in Atlanta.

#6- perhaps talk to your family to stay with them. And take a temp job to help pay for expenses while PROACTIVELY seeking better employment. It is easier to get a job while living nearby and in a job as you have current forms of reference. Also, it keeps your mind sharp and prepares you for interviews.

Whatever you do, just stay active and temporarily employed. It will help you stay afloat and prepared for whatever is next to come.

Good Luck!
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Old 06-01-2015, 07:55 AM
 
Location: O4W
3,744 posts, read 4,759,775 times
Reputation: 2076
Hate to bust your bubble but if you consider Atlanta "segregated" then DC and just about every city in the Midwest, South and East Cost is the same generally speaking. Actually both cities are the same generally speaking. Like the DMV most of the DMV "DC MD VA" diversity is in Northern Va and around the MD/DC border in Takoma Park/etc and the same is in Atlanta in Gwinnett County, Buford Hwy, Roswell rd, etc.

Another thing...most trolls might think I'm trolling but if you really look you will know I'm stating the truth. Most cities with large black populations are segregated because generally speaking the money flows better that way. Take a nightclub for example. If I own a nightclub and have a hip hop night my main target market will be African Americans. If I have a relax dress code it will probably be filled with the crowd most middle class blacks don't want to be around, generally speaking. If I have a dress code, a strict dress code, similar to when Dream first opened it will cater to the middle to upper middle class blacks. If I brought in one night lets say Frankie Beverly and Maze it will cater to blacks over 45 years old. These nights will be mostly AA and it will not be diverse. Why? Because most Spanish people would rather dance to Salsa and most white people would rather be at a bar....generally speaking. I can't open up a Salsa club and expect blacks and whites to pack it out, generally speaking. It will be a few blacks and whites there but it will not be a 33/33/33 split generally speaking. Lets look at churches, no matter where you go they are going to be segregated...generally speaking. It also depends on where you stay. It also depends on who you want to date. If Im into white women and hate Hip Hop Im not going to go to Ibiza nightclub...for example

Places that are considered less segregated....an example would be California. On paper they say "Come to California because we aren't segregated" which is true but there is a big reason why this is. It's like that because it isn't that many blacks in general so they are forced to segregate. Something similar happened to me when I was stationed in a small TX town about 15 years ago. We all went to a club that played only country music and some other BS. On paper someone visiting would have thought that particular city was diverse because of that nightclub but on paper that was our only option so we had to go there or stay in our dorm. On the flip side of that you might not get as many "black" networking events, conferences, nightclub venues, etc out west.

BTW, Atlanta, DC, Bmore, NYC....hell most cities with large black populations are "segregated" if you want to call it that. Lets get back to nightlife again. Dream for example had an International Night on Saturday. That worked because each floor catered to a different demographic. I think one floor was hip hop, another one was Salsa music and I forgot what the other floor had. If you go to certain places in Atlanta like Sound Table, MJQ, El Bar, etc are diverse. You can find placed similar in DC. That being said again most places are "segregated" because the business owner know what their demographic want to hear. Say I opened a venue playing mostly Future, Rick Ross, a Go Go band and lets say French Montana...it will not be diverse because most white people would rather go to a bar at night and most Spanish people would rather listen to Salsa. Now if I played more top 40 songs with some techno it may bring out more whites. Generally speaking. Also the location of the venues may not be in a location that other people may not feel safe going to. Generally speaking. Im sure plenty of people will come here saying I don't know what I'm talking about and DC isn't segregated...blah blah blah. It might not be segregated at the National Mall or in central places where everybody go but in day to day like its the same everywhere....I have lived in plenty of places and the moral of the story is in cities with large number of professional blacks there will not be much mixing because it isn't really needed for our day to day life. In places that are mixed, they are mixed because those blacks have very few options....generally speaking. Dallas, Atlanta, DC, Bmore, NYC, Norfolk, etc is all the same. If you want places where blacks mixed because they have few options go to any city on the west coast. Most people live in areas with people like them. Party with people like them. Etc. Good luck. BTW, I suggest you check out Meetup.com to meet more people



BTW, I didn't post this or any other post respond back and forth to everyone.

Last edited by afdinatl; 06-01-2015 at 09:09 AM..
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Old 06-01-2015, 08:27 AM
 
Location: Charlotte, Panther Carolina via ATL
42 posts, read 39,574 times
Reputation: 103
Very informative. ^
Actually learned some stuff from that.

But that guy from VA, no idea what hes talking about with the "southern golf douche", yeah, maybe in Johns Creek and Alpharetta only, but who are we kidding, we all know what kinda people live out there. You mustve didnt explore Atlanta metro very well if you think we're filled with people like that. You cant be serious, Gwinett and Cobb county alone COULDNT even have alot of people like that, and if you dont know what I mean my point is proven.

And of course in A.T.L. its gonna be segregated, like the guy/gal above me said, all major cities with large black population is segregated. If oyu live in West ATL/college park or something, of course its mainly black.

I always prefer Gwinett County in Atlanta, especially Duluth, I mean seriously we have one of the largest Korean popualtions here, its even Korean banks in this city, white people, professional Indians.. you name it, Atlanta is plenty diverse depending on where you are. I shopped at Megamart/H Mart all the time for groceries and I even learned alot about Korean food cause thats all I ate from going there so much, as a Black guy, in the South. And of course you have the Hispanics and Asian guys with their racing circle going on here(yes, theres actually street racin that goes on here, like 1-4AM, not good surely), and they are.... very interesting(and damn those cars are sweet, like straight out of Fast and Furious(which was filmed here ) with how they dress, handle and go about themselves to say the least. Also around here by Gwinett Place you should see the kinda people that go to the Silverback games, nuff said. If thats not culture diverse I dont know what is.

It surprises me how people can live here for years and still have a narrow view in Atlanta, I can tell none of most you guys werent raised here as I was/most natives. Hell even getting involved in our sports groups and regular spots can show the diversity here. But again, Im sure if you guys are sports fans, like most of you, you guys bring your team fandom down here with you, instead of getting involved with us like you guys do with everything else.. then complain when things arent like how you want, and are as flexible and compatible as radical "conservative" christian from west virginia.
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Old 06-01-2015, 08:57 AM
 
Location: New-Dentist Colony
5,759 posts, read 10,674,826 times
Reputation: 3952
Quote:
Originally Posted by TrustInSal View Post
But that guy from VA, no idea what hes talking about with the "southern golf douche", yeah, maybe in Johns Creek and Alpharetta only, but who are we kidding, we all know what kinda people live out there. You [must not have--(fixed it for you)] explored Atlanta metro very well if you think we're filled with people like that.
Uh, I lived in Peachtree Hills--in the City of Atlanta. I worked in Midtown. Never visited Alpharetta and never even heard of Johns Creek. There were plenty of such types with their seersucker, bowties, and vaguely Paula Deen mannerisms. Not every young white guy was like this--I sure wasn't--but there were a lot of them, compared with other cities.

Quote:
Originally Posted by futureATLien View Post
Post.
You're welcome. Glad we could help.


Last edited by Carlingtonian; 06-01-2015 at 09:06 AM..
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Old 06-01-2015, 09:05 AM
 
Location: O4W
3,744 posts, read 4,759,775 times
Reputation: 2076
Quote:
Originally Posted by TrustInSal View Post
Very informative. ^
Actually learned some stuff from that.

But that guy from VA, no idea what hes talking about with the "southern golf douche", yeah, maybe in Johns Creek and Alpharetta only, but who are we kidding, we all know what kinda people live out there. You mustve didnt explore Atlanta metro very well if you think we're filled with people like that. You cant be serious, Gwinett and Cobb county alone COULDNT even have alot of people like that, and if you dont know what I mean my point is proven.

And of course in A.T.L. its gonna be segregated, like the guy/gal above me said, all major cities with large black population is segregated. If oyu live in West ATL/college park or something, of course its mainly black.

I always prefer Gwinett County in Atlanta, especially Duluth, I mean seriously we have one of the largest Korean popualtions here, its even Korean banks in this city, white people, professional Indians.. you name it, Atlanta is plenty diverse depending on where you are. I shopped at Megamart/H Mart all the time for groceries and I even learned alot about Korean food cause thats all I ate from going there so much, as a Black guy, in the South. And of course you have the Hispanics and Asian guys with their racing circle going on here(yes, theres actually street racin that goes on here, like 1-4AM, not good surely), and they are.... very interesting(and damn those cars are sweet, like straight out of Fast and Furious(which was filmed here ) with how they dress, handle and go about themselves to say the least. Also around here by Gwinett Place you should see the kinda people that go to the Silverback games, nuff said. If thats not culture diverse I dont know what is.

It surprises me how people can live here for years and still have a narrow view in Atlanta, I can tell none of most you guys werent raised here as I was/most natives. Hell even getting involved in our sports groups and regular spots can show the diversity here. But again, Im sure if you guys are sports fans, like most of you, you guys bring your team fandom down here with you, instead of getting involved with us like you guys do with everything else.. then complain when things arent like how you want, and are as flexible and compatible as radical "conservative" christian from west virginia.
Yeah people love keeping that stereotype alive about Atlanta when every area in Gwinnett is diverse (most diverse county in the southeast) plus all the cool intown neighborhoods. She choose not to move to a diverse area of Atlanta or hang with a diverse group. Basically she choose to be close minded and is now complaining. She needs to change her way of thinking because she will have the same problem everywhere. She will have the same "problem" in DC. She will probably move to PG County instead of Northern Va which is more diverse, she will probably go to The Park on Friday instead of going to let's say a bar or a Salsa club and then complain DC isn't "diverse" when diversity is everywhere but it is up to that person to find it.

Another thing...generally speaking people need at least three things to begin to feel like home when they move to another city. They need a job, a decent place to stay and friends. It's plenty of transplants in both cities so as long as she has a good attitude it should be hard to meet people and they should transition over to friend status once they hang out a few times. Why isn't she meeting those people??

Last edited by afdinatl; 06-01-2015 at 09:29 AM..
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