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Old 06-27-2008, 06:32 AM
 
Location: Subarctic maritime Melbourne
5,054 posts, read 6,896,522 times
Reputation: 2862

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....so I made some Melbourne Climate jokes.


You Know you're in Melbourne when....

-You have to use lighting to see at midday,
-Temperatures considered "warm" here are considered "cold to the rest of Australia,
-People who are allergic to sunlight can enjoy the outdoors without risk for most of the year,
-you find you have to wear a sweater during your beachside jog on a January afternoon,
-you start comparing your weather to Vancouver's, Scotland's or the Falkland's,
-british tourists feel right at home,
-Christmas day feels like a christmas day in London,
-the amount of cloudy days equals the cloudy days of all other capital cities put together
-you want to wage war on the other capitals because you're jealous of their superior climates,
-a forecast of fine weather ends up being cloudy and rainy
-everyone worldwide recognises your hometown from its crappy weather
-doing the washing becomes a bigger challenge than your final year calculus exam,
-you throw away your weather station because you discoverd a much cheaper alternative, fidning that you can count the number of clear days each winter on your hands
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Old 06-27-2008, 06:40 AM
 
Location: Albany, GA (Hell's Waiting Room)
602 posts, read 1,962,109 times
Reputation: 287
Weird. I always heard that Australia is one of the hottest places on earth. Reading posts like yours always teaches me something.

I hate the climate here because it's hotter than the devil's underpants, and twice as humid. We have bugs in JANUARY, which proves to me that this IS hell.
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Old 06-27-2008, 06:45 AM
 
Location: Subarctic maritime Melbourne
5,054 posts, read 6,896,522 times
Reputation: 2862
^^ Australia is only really, really hot in some parts of the outback. There is one patch of desert in the northwest of the country which sees average temps over 100F 6 months of the year, where the small town of Marble Bar had an average high temp of 113ºF / 45ºC in February 2006.

Melbourne is far from being hot. It's summers resemble Los Angeles and winters are similar to southern inland Texas.
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Old 06-27-2008, 07:41 AM
 
Location: So. Dak.
13,495 posts, read 37,434,568 times
Reputation: 15205
SAB, have you considered moving to the outback? Maybe some day you'll be able to live where it's hot all the time.

I actually don't love the hot weather as much as despising the cold weather. I love my climate about 5 months during an average year. I whine and moan about it the other 7 months. It can get very cold here though and part of the reason is aches and pains related.
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Old 06-27-2008, 08:33 AM
 
Location: TwilightZone
5,296 posts, read 6,470,342 times
Reputation: 1031
Can't stand hot.
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Old 06-27-2008, 08:45 AM
 
Location: still in exile......
29,890 posts, read 9,957,701 times
Reputation: 5904
I HATE the climate here(SE FL), WAAAAY too hot for 9 months of the year(March-November), mattyj46's climate sounds good to me right now
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Old 06-27-2008, 10:39 AM
 
Location: Yootó
1,305 posts, read 3,610,776 times
Reputation: 811
Well if you think its hot right now, just wait a few years. On the other hand, if you think its too cold, you might be in for a pleasant surprise. I figure I might start looking for a nice piece of property I can retire to in Canada in about 15 years. By then it will be perfect up there.

http://www.noaanews.noaa.gov/stories2008/20080619_climatereport.html
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Old 06-27-2008, 10:41 AM
 
Location: Philadelphia, PA
343 posts, read 932,354 times
Reputation: 198
I live in Philly and the climate is pretty bad. I'm originally from Santa Barbara, CA where the climate is perfect. Perhaps I've been spoiled.
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Old 06-27-2008, 11:03 AM
 
Location: TwilightZone
5,296 posts, read 6,470,342 times
Reputation: 1031
Quote:
Originally Posted by SBCA View Post
I live in Philly and the climate is pretty bad. I'm originally from Santa Barbara, CA where the climate is perfect. Perhaps I've been spoiled.
You ain't seen nothin yet
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Old 06-27-2008, 11:51 AM
 
Location: in my mind
2,743 posts, read 14,292,156 times
Reputation: 1627
I live in San Antonio, TX. And yes, I hate the climate here. I force myself and the kids to get our daily "dose" of sunshine but aside from that I try my best to stay INSIDE from May through September/October. Blech and blech. I cannot stand trying to do stuff with sweat running in my eyes. The other day I was outside tending to some of my plants, for about 30 minutes, and I came inside and was dizzy and seeing spots for another 30 minutes!

I actually do all my gardening after dark with a big flashlight/spotlight now!

I remember when I worked at my kids' school, how we had to severely limit their outside time due to heatstroke concerns.

I was raised in South Texas and despite that fact I feel like I will NEVER be accustomed to the weather here. Ever!

Here are some of those "you know your from Texas when..." funnies that are weather related for these parts:

*

You no longer associate bridges with water.
*

You can say 110 degrees without fainting.
*

You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.
*

You can make instant sun tea.
*

You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.
*

The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a bit chilly.
*

You discover that in July it takes only two fingers to drive your car.
*

You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.
*

You know the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
*

Hot water comes out of both taps.
*

You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
*

No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning.
*

You break a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. before work.
*

You realize asphalt has a liquid state.
*

It's so hot the birds have to use pot holders to pull worms out of the ground.
*

It's so hot that potatoes cook underground and all you have to do for lunch is to pull one out and add butter with trimmings.
*

It's so hot farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard boiled eggs.
*
*

You've taken your kids trick-or-treating when it was 90 degrees outside.
*

*When it rains, everyone is smiling
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