Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I think it is tacky to exclude your sister's daughter...she is your son's first cousin....It may not be proper etiquette, but it isn't a formal wedding either. Just shows your son is marrying a controlling person, since the bride doesn't like the cousin, so she isn't invited.
No one knows what is going on. I guess in the end it has to do with space, money, and numbers. I would do the same thing. I rather have a nice small wedding that a large very average wedding.
There is a photo of the invitation and it said guest.
You are correct, there is something else going on. I assume they want a small wedding. Both cousins are single and with no kids. My son knows of them, but did not grow up with them. In reality they probably do not want either cousin.
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626
Thanks for the update. IMHO, that is very odd to say "guest" as if your son did not even know the name of his first cousin. When you say that he "knows of them" does that mean that he hasn't even met his first cousins yet?
Does your son know these first cousins?
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626
Are there more first cousins than just those two siblings on your side of the family? Are they invited?
Does the bride have a lot of first cousins? Are they invited?.
Not a single cousin is coming. On my side he only has two cousins and 13 cousins on my wife's side. I think I am getting the picture now.
Thanks for answering about the number of cousins.
OK, if your son has 15 first cousins and none of them are coming to the wedding then it is fair.
Unless, the bride also has a number of first cousins and all of them were invited and are coming to the wedding.
But, then again, it may still be fair & part of a system of equality.
At my wedding, every one of my husband's7 first cousins were children or young teens still living at home and were all invited. Of my cousins, only 2 or 3 were still at home and were invited to our wedding, approximately 35 or 40 first cousins (I'm too tired to count them tonight) were adults, almost all with spouses and children. Our "system" was to only invite the first cousins who were under 18 and living at home, which we did.
I was incorrect when I assumed the invitation read Mr. and Mrs.________plus the son
So in retrospect I believe my sister was not incorrect in thinking she could bring the daughter instead of the son. I also think the bride and my son made an error by including a third person if money and space was tight. After all we are talking about adult children.
Oh my! This is a pickle.
I believe that etiquette dictates the invitation be addressed to the specific people invited to the wedding, which means the envelope should have read
Mr. & Mrs. _________
Mr. ________
It would have been kind and generous of the bride and groom to extend an invitation for your nephew to ask a date. A separate invitation is required for any family member living at a different address, which includes your niece. I actually find it a little stunning that a first cousin would not be invited to a wedding, but you did indicate that it was a small affair.
Edit:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Julian658
Not a single cousin is coming. On my side he only has two cousins and 13 cousins on my wife's side. I think I am getting the picture now.
Ah. There it is.
Last edited by randomparent; 06-11-2015 at 04:20 PM..
You are the groom's family and therefore second fiddle. Might as well get used to it.
Got it! In a sense is liberating!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
In a sense is liberating!
