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This goes back a few years but I need to contact a "friend" (Tom) whom I did not send a wedding gift to when he got married so I thought I would get everyone's feed back. He played poker with me and my friends for a number of years and some of us became good friends.
Here's the back story:
My wife and I were married in 9/2013. We invited "Tom plus a guest" but he was out of town and could not attend. He promptly sent me a card and a check for $100.
Fast forward to 1/2014: We receive a save a date from Tom for his wedding in 6/2014 (as did others in my poker crew). Months go by and no invitation. As a matter of fact, none of my friends in my "poker crew" who received a save a date received an invitation. His wedding date arrived and one of my friends decided to text and ask him why we weren't invited. He simply replied: "I haven't spoken to you guys in a while..."
Given this scenario, was I obligated to give Tom a gift?
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
44,572 posts, read 81,167,557 times
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I agree that you have no obligation to give a gift, but would not condemn him for not inviting you either. With two of my kids married now, I have become well aware of the bride and her family controlling the guest list. When it comes down to the maximum number of people to fit the venue, and the maximum budget for guests, the groom's family and friends always end up with the short end of the stick.
I never understand why people send save dates and then they don't invite you.
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