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I think it's not fair to judge other people by your standard. You really have no idea what a woman's integrity is, relative to the price of a ring. Nor do you know what is relatively affordable from one couple to the next.
Exactly. If someone *wants* to spend whatever money, their money, on whatever, so be it. I'm sure many can't fathom spending $50k on a new vehicle, but many do, and they lose value right after you drive off the lot. Others think it's more sensible to spend a modest amount on a vehicle since it's only meant to take you from point a to b. There are certain things I'll pay $$$ for. Nice electronics is one of one. I like a nice sound system, new technology, gaming computer and consoles, nice TVs, phones. I like tech. Others don't. I've also spent $$$ on jewelry, and sold several pieces, though you never get close to what you spent. I'll also pay $$ for artwork, antique books, jewelry, etc. Again, not everyone places such monetary value in these things. That's up to the individual to decide, as it's their money and their business. If someone feels that strongly about spending habits and what objects they value, look for those who share the same ideals.
Exactly. If someone *wants* to spend whatever money, their money, on whatever, so be it. I'm sure many can't fathom spending $50k on a new vehicle, but many do, and they lose value right after you drive off the lot. Others think it's more sensible to spend a modest amount on a vehicle since it's only meant to take you from point a to b. There are certain things I'll pay $$$ for. Nice electronics is one of one. I like a nice sound system, new technology, gaming computer and consoles, nice TVs, phones. I like tech. Others don't. I've also spent $$$ on jewelry, and sold several pieces, though you never get close to what you spent. I'll also pay $$ for artwork, antique books, jewelry, etc. Again, not everyone places such monetary value in these things. That's up to the individual to decide, as it's their money and their business. If someone feels that strongly about spending habits and what objects they value, look for those who share the same ideals.
Thanks!
My husband enjoys electronics too. He upgrades to a new computer every couple of years, and spends many evenings playing WOW. We have a nice modern smart TV, sound bar...all that stuff. Mostly because that's what HE likes, as opposed to me asking for these things. (Although I did ask for a blue tooth speaker for my birthday, so I could listen to my Pandora in the car.)
I don't give him trouble about what he likes to spend his money on. Our bills get paid, we have money in the bank, he plans for "us" and he's a very generous man.
By the same token, he doesn't complain about what I spend my discretionary money on either, and he's on my insurance, because mine is better than his company's.
So...it kind of rubs me the wrong way when my integrity, or my I.Q., or my leadership skills are questioned over the price of my engagement ring. lol
I think it's not fair to judge other people by your standard. You really have no idea what a woman's integrity is, relative to the price of a ring. Nor do you know what is relatively affordable from one couple to the next.
Fair enough, my opinion is about middle class/upper middle class professionals that I usually dated. Living in expensive Metropolitan areas. And yes, I would've avoided/broken up with any woman in this class who expects a ring that is more than roughly $1,500 and she is not willing to contribute. Mainly because I consider those women's demands for men's money unreasonable and sexist. Again, this is of course my opinion. If a couple want to spend $4,000 on a ring and both contribute, I see no issue.
But I feel sorry for any guy who is either depleting his savings or even worse borrowing to buy an expensive engagement ring in the 10-15k range. It is very likely that nothing good will come out from this.
Fair enough, my opinion is about middle class/upper middle class professionals that I usually dated. Living in expensive Metropolitan areas. And yes, I would've avoided/broken up with any woman in this class who expects a ring that is more than roughly $1,500 and she is not willing to contribute. Mainly because I consider those women's demands for men's money unreasonable and sexist. Again, this is of course my opinion. If a couple want to spend $4,000 on a ring and both contribute, I see no issue.
But I feel sorry for any guy who is either depleting his savings or even worse borrowing to buy an expensive engagement ring in the 10-15k range. It is very likely that nothing good will come out from this.
And well you SHOULD avoid women who make unreasonable demands on you. I'm not fond of demands either. Probably none of us are.
But lots of couples in loving relationships come to understandings and have discussions about this stuff, and come to agreements, which is their business. Be it $1000 to a million or whatever. There's no point, as far as I can tell, to putting some kind of values judgement on these things, when we don't even know (and again, I'll reiterate) their business.
When my second husband and I got engaged, we started talking about rings. I still had my engagement ring from my first marriage, so I suggested that we use that ring, but switch out the main diamond (which was a marquis cut) for an emerald cut diamond, which also happened to be bigger than the marquis, since essentially, he was only buying one stone, and the cost of the installation. I found a ring wrap that I liked and I paid for that, and the cost of having it soddered together, and I paid for his ring.
Years later, I lost that ring. So a few years after THAT, he bought me a new one. I wear it with 2 eternity bands that I paid for. One band is white gold and CZ's, and the other is stainless steel with CZ's.
I have a friend that says "I can commit to a man. I can't commit to a ring."
I like that sentiment. She's changed up her wedding ring several times. Not all of them expensive. Probably, knowing her, most of them not expensive. Personally, I feel like if a cigar band has special significance to you (you being anyone), than wear your cigar band.
If you and your honey can afford and WANT a $30,000 diamond ring...that's your business, and love your ring.
All these folks that speak in these declarative sentences shaming other people for how they spend their money...it's kind of insulting, but it's also kind of funny.
OMG. I thought I was the only one.
I have an assortment of bands I wear. I have short fingers and I don’t like to wear two rings together, so sometimes I’ll wear my diamond, or my Amoragem band. My husband has RA, and there’s no way we can size up his band (our original bands are intricate and can’t be simply sized. They have to be remade.). I’ve been stuck on this gorgeous silver band, but I started scouring Etsy again. Yellow gold is reading its head on my wish list.
As for wasting money? If your intended must have a 200K ring and you make 25k a year, I think that’s a clear indication to run. But I’m also pretty sure the engagement ring wouldn’t be your first indication of trouble.
Fair enough, my opinion is about middle class/upper middle class professionals that I usually dated. Living in expensive Metropolitan areas. And yes, I would've avoided/broken up with any woman in this class who expects a ring that is more than roughly $1,500 and she is not willing to contribute. Mainly because I consider those women's demands for men's money unreasonable and sexist. Again, this is of course my opinion. If a couple want to spend $4,000 on a ring and both contribute, I see no issue.
But I feel sorry for any guy who is either depleting his savings or even worse borrowing to buy an expensive engagement ring in the 10-15k range. It is very likely that nothing good will come out from this.
Don't venture over to pricescope then (I participate occasionally). Women and men regularly dish out $10, 20, 30, 40+k for engagement rings and upgrades. I've seen men with $80-100k budgets. Now, a lot of these posters are UC or wealthy, or they hit a marriage milestone, as many upgrade to something bigger and/or nicer when they have the means to. Just like if I had the means, I'd buy a Tesla X, but I don't, so I drive a van that suits my family's needs that fits our budget.
But if these folks putting down 20+k are UC, then they can probably afford luxury goods. I have a thing for vintage jewelry. Diamonds and gemstones. I've owned $$$ pieces. I like them. Just like I really like my expensive cameras and lenses, and high end niche and bespoke fragrances. We all have things we like and value that others don't. You just have to find a partner whose outlook matches your own.
I have an assortment of bands I wear. I have short fingers and I don’t like to wear two rings together, so sometimes I’ll wear my diamond, or my Amoragem band. My husband has RA, and there’s no way we can size up his band (our original bands are intricate and can’t be simply sized. They have to be remade.). I’ve been stuck on this gorgeous silver band, but I started scouring Etsy again. Yellow gold is reading its head on my wish list.
As for wasting money? If your intended must have a 200K ring and you make 25k a year, I think that’s a clear indication to run. But I’m also pretty sure the engagement ring wouldn’t be your first indication of trouble.
I had an OEC Amora a couple years ago. I'm eyeing another one, but want one smaller than what's listed on BTD.
I had an OEC Amora a couple years ago. I'm eyeing another one, but want one smaller than what's listed on BTD.
My thing is I prefer smaller stones. Right now everyone wants at least a carat, and on my short fingers a carat looks unwieldy.
We own and operate a Janitorial company, and recently I had someone toss out an engagement ring with a very small diamond and 6 little melee stones, with a bunch of junk jewelry. And a dainty pair of diamond earrings. We posted notices, management brought it up at the board meeting, but there’s no response and it’s been four months. Now I have to figure out what to do with it.
A month later someone else tossed out two Rolexes. They were disgustingly dirty.
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