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So, I suggested to my mother that we include just the "blood" cousins (since my father is so hung up on the fact that they are "blood" relatives), and not the spouses. This would open up 2 more seats, and would be fair compromise in between what we want and what my father wants (sort of meeting him in the middle). I understand that this might be a bit unorthodox, but considering how limited our seating is, and the fact that I have never even met the spouses, I don't see the harm in it. My mother is telling me that this option is entirely out of the question; I'd be interested to know your thoughts.
1) Its your wedding, not your parents so you should invite who YOU want.
2) YES it is RUDE to not have their spouse invited with them! (even saying no kids bugs me but i can sort of understand this in certain circumstances)
In the end its your day and you have to do what makes you happy. I can tell you, your cousins will talk about how you didnt include their spouses and they will tell others.
If you havent put a deposit on your venue, maybe you can go slightly bigger OR see if current venue has some sort of outdoor area to include.
1) Its your wedding, not your parents so you should invite who YOU want.
2) YES it is RUDE to not have their spouse invited with them! (even saying no kids bugs me but i can sort of understand this in certain circumstances)
In the end its your day and you have to do what makes you happy. I can tell you, your cousins will talk about how you didnt include their spouses and they will tell others.
If you havent put a deposit on your venue, maybe you can go slightly bigger OR see if current venue has some sort of outdoor area to include.
*Married and renewed my vows as well.
Good points.
BTW, even if your parents are paying for the entire wedding, IMHO, the wedding couple should have the final say on the guest list.
I knew one bride whose parents threw her a swanky wedding at their country club and invited numerous business associates of the parents who the bride & groom had never even met, but refused to allow the bride & groom to invite their friends from college. IMHO, that was completely wrong.
The only reason that I got to attend was because I was one of three bridesmaids.
Last edited by germaine2626; 04-26-2016 at 10:58 AM..
Blood, schmud. No cousins, no spouses of cousins. What's your demanding dad going to do, refuse to attend your wedding?
This. If you are putting up the funds, everyone else's "needs" are simply their opinion and you can do what you want with it. You have the final word in this, not them.
This. If you are putting up the funds, everyone else's "needs" are simply their opinion and you can do what you want with it. You have the final word in this, not them.
This.
We chose a venue that held 30 people so you can imagine how many weren't invited, including cousins i'm close to, (although not geographically close). We didn't want a large wedding, really wanted the venue, so worked to fit in 30 people. Only one cousin was annoyed at not being included but she seems to be over it.
I personally would not invite relatives you barely know at the expense of family and friends who are in your daily life.
Or instead of three cousins, invite one with his wife. But I agree, inviting a married person without their spouse is a bit weird and tacky. How would you even put something like this in the invitation? "Dear So So, You and Only you are invited to our wedding. Your wife must stay home as she does not fit in our venue..."
Invite only who you & your intended wish to. Period.
Married people are always invited as a couple.
Enjoy your wedding day and good luck.
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