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Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
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I have a friend that had to cancel her wedding plans in June because of the pandemic. Since the spring & summer are common wedding months........I'm super curious to know how many other people have had to cancel & what are your new plans? Are you postponing it.....or just getting married without the wedding?
This is N O T meant to talk about coronavirus....because there are so many threads about that BUT about your postponed or cancelled wedding & a place to vent or feel sad about it. My wedding isn't until NYE........but I know the kind of disappointment that I would have if I was faced with that reality......after M O N T H S of planning & anticipation.
If you had to postpone or cancel for other reasons...........that's welcome too!!!!
My husband has a niece (she's just a few years younger than me, and it would be her 3rd wedding) getting married in May. So far, she has not cancelled or reset plans. Personally, I think it's foolish not to. But maybe she figures if she cancelled things now, she'd lose all her deposits, etc.
Original plan (aka "Plan A: Delusions of Grandeur" lol) :
At the kink convention we attend every year, Thunder In The Mountains, where 1,000 people would be, including a good couple hundred or so of our personal friends, which was to be held (this year, for the last year) at a very beautiful hotel property that had PLENTY of extra event space, we were going to have our wedding and reception. A famous writer/educator/all-around-incredibly-human being, Midori, had agreed to officiate the ceremony for us. World famous. She wrote the first book in the English language on Japanese rope technique (Shibari). She is a big freaking deal in our little world.
This was going to cost a lot of money. I'd say a good 4 times more than what I really feel OK about spending on our wedding, honestly. Even though I was planning ways to cut costs like DIY'ing my wedding dress (I'm still doing that) and inexpensive rings... Still.
Now... The convention is cancelled, and so is my wedding at the hotel, and I won't have a gathering that will make any sense of getting a big amazing cake like that.
My plan is to rent a VRBO that is big enough for my fiance and I, and our photographer who already said he's completely on board to photograph whatever we end up doing. I am working on the dress still, and if I have the time and can obtain the materials, I want to create a pair of color coordinated plague doctor masks that will match our wedding attire, and we can approach one another wearing them, and then remove them to speak our vows. I will have the same baker do a very small, simple cake for just the 3 of us, and the photographer can stay the night and then go home and we will have a long "romantic getaway" weekend in the mountains/forest, in a place that will definitely be secluded and have a hot tub, will hopefully also have a fire pit and a pool table.
And next year, we will put together some kind of a celebration to have with our friends.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
9,297 posts, read 4,587,939 times
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Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork
This was going to cost a lot of money. I'd say a good 4 times more than what I really feel OK about spending on our wedding, honestly. Even though I was planning ways to cut costs like DIY'ing my wedding dress (I'm still doing that) and inexpensive rings... Still.
Hi Sonic....cancelling was the right thing to do if you were paying 4 times what you could afford...pandemic or not. I'm sure your wedding will be lovely.......what's important is the man that you're marrying IMO................
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
9,297 posts, read 4,587,939 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassybluesy
My husband has a niece (she's just a few years younger than me, and it would be her 3rd wedding) getting married in May. So far, she has not cancelled or reset plans. Personally, I think it's foolish not to. But maybe she figures if she cancelled things now, she'd lose all her deposits, etc.
If she is canceling because of the pandemic tho........can they keep the deposit? Ita that it's foolish not to if it's in May............
Original plan (aka "Plan A: Delusions of Grandeur" lol) :
At the kink convention we attend every year, Thunder In The Mountains, where 1,000 people would be, including a good couple hundred or so of our personal friends, which was to be held (this year, for the last year) at a very beautiful hotel property that had PLENTY of extra event space, we were going to have our wedding and reception. A famous writer/educator/all-around-incredibly-human being, Midori, had agreed to officiate the ceremony for us. World famous. She wrote the first book in the English language on Japanese rope technique (Shibari). She is a big freaking deal in our little world.
This was going to cost a lot of money. I'd say a good 4 times more than what I really feel OK about spending on our wedding, honestly. Even though I was planning ways to cut costs like DIY'ing my wedding dress (I'm still doing that) and inexpensive rings... Still.
Now... The convention is cancelled, and so is my wedding at the hotel, and I won't have a gathering that will make any sense of getting a big amazing cake like that.
My plan is to rent a VRBO that is big enough for my fiance and I, and our photographer who already said he's completely on board to photograph whatever we end up doing. I am working on the dress still, and if I have the time and can obtain the materials, I want to create a pair of color coordinated plague doctor masks that will match our wedding attire, and we can approach one another wearing them, and then remove them to speak our vows. I will have the same baker do a very small, simple cake for just the 3 of us, and the photographer can stay the night and then go home and we will have a long "romantic getaway" weekend in the mountains/forest, in a place that will definitely be secluded and have a hot tub, will hopefully also have a fire pit and a pool table.
And next year, we will put together some kind of a celebration to have with our friends.
Sonic, I have been following your plans for your amazing wedding and am sorry that it had to be cancelled. You seem to have a very good attitude about it. The only important thing is that you and your fiance are both healthy and are getting married.
Perhaps, you can have a party or a reception, with all of your friends, at the 2021 convention.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
9,297 posts, read 4,587,939 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626
Sonic, I have been following your plans for your amazing wedding and am sorry that it had to be cancelled. You seem to have a very good attitude about it. The only important thing is that you and your fiance are both healthy and are getting married.
Perhaps, you can have a party or a reception, with all of your friends, at the 2021 convention.
BTW, that is an absolutely fabulous looking cake.
She'll still have a beautiful wedding & save money too without an expensive cake............BUT you'll have to still show us a picture of the dress when you have it finished........
I have one relative who postponed their wedding from early June to October.
On social media I have seen photos of three separate weddings that took place this month at homes, in the yard, and one at a venue, with guests spaced apart.
Still seems risky to me, but I guess some people didn't want to wait.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
9,297 posts, read 4,587,939 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle
I have one relative who postponed their wedding from early June to October.
On social media I have seen photos of three separate weddings that took place this month at homes, in the yard, and one at a venue, with guests spaced apart.
Still seems risky to me, but I guess some people didn't want to wait.
Ita it seems risky.....AND everybody spaced far apart would be hard for a wedding. How would you even talk to your guests without shouting from 6 feet apart....or have a bride & groom mask? As hard as it would be after months of planning.......IMO I would cancel or postpone or just marry my man at the courthouse & have a party later.
Sonic, I have been following your plans for your amazing wedding and am sorry that it had to be cancelled. You seem to have a very good attitude about it. The only important thing is that you and your fiance are both healthy and are getting married.
Perhaps, you can have a party or a reception, with all of your friends, at the 2021 convention.
BTW, that is an absolutely fabulous looking cake.
Thanks!
I have a sense of humor about it and I'm pretty good at seeing the silver lining and rolling with the punches, changing plans on the fly...
I joke that the Universe noted that I was having delusions of grandeur and told me to sit the hell down. But of course I'm not so silly as to think that a pandemic happened to teach me a lesson. I remain touched and happy that when it seemed possible, the woman we admire was willing to officiate for us. And I feel some relief that my new plans will cost less and probably be less complicated and therefore less stressful.
And I know that my fiance and I will enjoy a vacation alone together. The photographer is a good friend and we'll enjoy his company for a little bit, he's quite isolated so I feel safe about being in contact with him. And he is doing what he can to make a living; we are paying him of course.
We don't even have to have witnesses or an officiant at our wedding, we can simply speak our vows, make whatever kind of ceremony out of it we want to, and sign off on the docs ourselves. So we are doing that, pretty much.
With regards to the cake, thanks! If you Google image search "steampunk wedding cake" you will see that it's actually one of the less ornate ones...some of them are incredibly detailed. I decided to do a vaguely steampunk themed wedding because a.) I love steampunk music, especially Abney Park, and b.) the reception space in the Lake House has all those gold tones, so I wouldn't have to decorate much at all, and c.) the cakes just look way too cool.
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As hard as it would be after months of planning.......IMO I would cancel or postpone or just marry my man at the courthouse & have a party later.
