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With the costs of wedding these days. And if the couple both have good paying jobs the question raised is that should the parents of the bride still pay for the wedding? Couples need to realize that in the event if they hit a fork in the road with their marriage, the wife can always throw in the husbands face that her parents payed for the wedding. It is almost like selling your soul to the devil. Yet you always will hear that the payment from the parents is a gift. But always remember nothing is for free. Everything has its price.AND their is no perfect marriage. Couples always argue and will hit forks in the road. Marriage is not garunteed either these days. People have become more self centered and selffish due to social media and other crap out there. IT is best that couples should pay their own wedding, that in case is better if something does happen there is nothing to throw in someones face. It seems people say that if parents pay that the couple can then start on their own life planning. Well marriage is that but wedding cost should be on their side also because how is a couple supposed to learn about financial responsibilty down the road? Always remember this day in age cost of health insurance is going up for families and people are retiring later in life. So people need to think the word BUDGET!!!. If you are adult to get married. YOu should know about financial responsibilities
Last edited by goldbugrun; 01-01-2019 at 09:44 AM..
Should grooms allow for brides parents to pay for whole wedding?
Unless those grooms are so poor, cannot afford to pay a cent, and the brides are from very rich family, and those brides love those grooms so much and their families agree to pay. Or unless those brides are so desperate to be wedded.
If I were a man, no matter rich or poor, I would not allow my fiance's parents to pay for the whole wedding. I would feel shamed to let that happens. If both of us wanted to have a wedding, I would work my butt off to have enough money to pay half of it at least.
Lots of couples pay for their own weddings these days.
They also split costs. Not everyone follows traditions.
Besides, if you "hit a fork in the road" and the wife throws that in her husband's face, they have bigger problems than just who paid for what.
It has been many, many years since I have attended a wedding where (I suspected or knew) that the bride's parents paid for the entire wedding. Heck, even when I married 42 years ago Hubby and I paid for the full cost of our wedding. We would never have considered asking my parents to pay for it.
Usually both of the couple have split the cost of the wedding, but in some cases parents of both the bride and the groom have contributed part of the money needed (as well as the wedding couple). YMMV
Besides, if you "hit a fork in the road" and the wife throws that in her husband's face, they have bigger problems than just who paid for what.
That's what I was thinking. I can't even imagine that coming up in an argument between my SO and I. i don't even understand what the point of such a remark would be. My SO doesn't owe me anything just because my parents gave us money for our wedding.
OP, what is your ax to grind here? Why does it matter to you what someone else does for their wedding? If YOU want to pay for your own wedding, go for it. If another man is content to let the bride's parents pay, what is it to you? And to echo another post, if the happy couple are throwing such things in each other's faces, that marriage isn't going to make it anyway. This just seems like a really pointless rant. Every couple handles their finances in their own way. You don't have to agree with them.
That's what I was thinking. I can't even imagine that coming up in an argument between my SO and I. i don't even understand what the point of such a remark would be. My SO doesn't owe me anything just because my parents gave us money for our wedding.
I agree- my Ex used to remind me all the time that it was an inheritance from HIS parents that provided the down payment on our house in a very HCOL area. Like, get over it. I worked FT at a very well-paying job during the entire marriage (which is more than I can say for him) so it wasn't like I contributed zero to the relationship.
Weddings are complicated. Finances are complicated. Sometimes the couple is doing better financially than the parents, sometimes the opposite. Sometimes the couple wants a quiet, inexpensive wedding and the parents want a big blowout, sometimes the opposite. The couple and their families need to come to an agreement that works for them. It's a good test of relationship and family dynamics!
A lot depends upon the age of the couple and the financial circumstances of the families. When my daughter got married, we gave them a budget and had a very nice wedding within it. They were both just a few years out of college, and the grooms parents were both deceased. The grooms brother and SIL threw a nice party at their house after the rehearsal.
If a couple have careers and money, and want to plan everything, the parents can offer to contribute, but it’s not necessary.
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