Westchester High schools and drinking/drugs? (White Plains, Scarsdale: home, middle school, live in) - Westchester County - New York (NY) - City-Data Forum

lbsing · 01-16-2007, 06:30 PM

I have another question about Westchester schools. As I have stated before, I live overseas in Singapore. Our children are very sheltered and this place is extremely safe. I read a lot about the drinking and drugs that go on in the Westchester High schools (such as Scarsdale, etc). Is this a huge problem? I am a bit nervous about returning to the US to expose problems such as these to my kids.

mead · 01-17-2007, 01:39 AM

Wai lao! You think Singaporean kids don't drink? ;-)

Well a lot of American kids engage in such activity, at least the drinking part. Smoking pot is a tad bit less widespread among teenagers but it still occurs to a large degree. Of course it all depends on what type of crowd your kid hangs with. If he/she hangs out in certain circles then drinking/drugs won't be an issue.

In all honesty though, a lot of Asian, specifically Chinese, parents are able to shelter their kids from drinking/drugs and this is generally not such a big issue among Asian-Americans.

lbsing · 01-17-2007, 06:32 AM

I never said Singaporean kids don't drink. And I am not Singaporean...or Asian for that matter. I am just saying that drugs and pot and heavy partying on the weekends just doesn't seem to be that common here in the International Schools or in Singapore. I have read that Scarsdale has had some serious problems. I also just hear about High Schools at home, in general. I was just wondering if it is a problem.

mead · 01-17-2007, 09:33 AM

Oh sorry, I was confusing you with another poster who was Singaporean. My bad.

Yeah but thats because people get hanged for drug dealing in Singapore. If the same was done in the USA then it wouldn't be such a problem.

Just keep a good eye on your kids and it shouldn't be such a problem. As long as they aren't hanging out with the wrong crowd or something like that then I don't see why this would be an issue.

If on the other hand both the mother and farther are working all the time and the kids are basically raising themselves, then it could be more of an issue.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lbsing

I never said Singaporean kids don't drink. And I am not Singaporean...or Asian for that matter. I am just saying that drugs and pot and heavy partying on the weekends just doesn't seem to be that common here in the International Schools or in Singapore. I have read that Scarsdale has had some serious problems. I also just hear about High Schools at home, in general. I was just wondering if it is a problem.

lbsing · 01-17-2007, 10:27 AM

Thanks! Luckily for me, I don't work and I am very involved in my kids lives. I just have been overseas for sometime now and am a bit fearful of comng back to the US. I have seen it change for the worse over the past 10 years. But, we are at a point in our kids lives that we need to stay here in Singapore or come home. We could stay here and let them finish middle schoolhigh school in a place that has kind of a "pretend reality" (although very easy and safe) and no sense of belonging to a community to a place where we can settle and they can establish life long friends and plant some roots. We are originally from the south. But, because of our worldy experiences, we know we can never go back there. The NY area seems to be the place that we would be more likely to relate to. I worry sometimes that my desire to come home could overshadow the fact that we have a really good situation in a very complicated world. The exposure to drugs and such makes me hesitant to pursue this move. (We do have the option to stay or go.) So, any advice on this would be great to hear!

eslteacher · 01-18-2007, 06:19 PM

I went to high school in Westchester. Drinking and drugs are a huge part of high school. There are definitely kids who resist the scene, but almost every party the "popular kids" have has drinking.

ontheroad · 01-18-2007, 06:35 PM

There is no question that high school here in the States will differ dramatically from Singapore--solely because of the cultural differences. Scarsdale HS will not be more drug-party than Pelham or White Plains.

Parents though can exercise some control, but not sufficient control to offset peer pressures and peer involvement. I was very active in my children's lives, but I wasn't with them 7/24.

It's a balancing act--being a parent.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lbsing

Thanks! Luckily for me, I don't work and I am very involved in my kids lives. I just have been overseas for sometime now and am a bit fearful of comng back to the US. I have seen it change for the worse over the past 10 years. But, we are at a point in our kids lives that we need to stay here in Singapore or come home. We could stay here and let them finish middle schoolhigh school in a place that has kind of a "pretend reality" (although very easy and safe) and no sense of belonging to a community to a place where we can settle and they can establish life long friends and plant some roots. We are originally from the south. But, because of our worldy experiences, we know we can never go back there. The NY area seems to be the place that we would be more likely to relate to. I worry sometimes that my desire to come home could overshadow the fact that we have a really good situation in a very complicated world. The exposure to drugs and such makes me hesitant to pursue this move. (We do have the option to stay or go.) So, any advice on this would be great to hear!

brahmos · 01-18-2007, 07:13 PM

Seriously this is something to expect in any suburban school, not just Westchester County. Let's face it, kids dont have much to do apart from school and sports that they end up hanging out and partying with their friends. This is what happens when you live in an area where kids cannot really hang out anywhere or enjoy any cultural life.

Also when they do start drinking you will know. This is where your responsibility as parents come in. You must advise your child or children of the dangers of drugs and alcohol. And even if they do engage in this activity, despite your warnings, you can still try and prevent them. Too many parents in Westchester knowingly let their kids have drugs/alchol and even let them throw parties in the house, and then claim ignorance on the matter. You do not have to be one of them.

This is the question that you cannot avoid, no matter where you live.

Beesh · 01-22-2007, 04:53 PM

Sounds like it boiles down to being a personal choice America/Singapore.
Kids will be kids as I'm sure you know and Westchester is has nothing to do with it or how accepting your children are or will be to the things you've sheltered them from.
Everything changes, the world is no exception

Dedalus · 01-22-2007, 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brahmos

Seriously this is something to expect in any suburban school, not just Westchester County. Let's face it, kids dont have much to do apart from school and sports that they end up hanging out and partying with their friends. This is what happens when you live in an area where kids cannot really hang out anywhere or enjoy any cultural life.

My experience was mixed. I lived in an area that was so far out in the Borough of Queens that it really had a Long Island flavor to it. But I went to HS in Manhattan. So, I had two sets of friends.

By far, the biggest drinkers and druggies I knew were among the suburban kids. That's why I tell people; move out here for the safety? guess again.

Boredom kills.