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I little while back, I told you guys about my boss, and he was diagnosed in the early stages of Alzheimer's. Since then, he has been handing over more of the duties to his son, who will eventually take over the business. Great guy to work for/with. 3 weeks ago, my little sister (adopted, this is important) had her little girl, and in all likelihood will be the only child she will ever get to have. Her husband, and the childs father, was killed in a car accident shortly after my sis found out she was pregnant. Since then, we all, my family, have been stepping up and helping her out.
The son had been out of town when my niece as born, and just got back Monday, but I hadnt seen him until yesterday. I was showing him some pics of my niece, and was telling him how she came very early, on a Friday morning, like 2am, and I was there and was pretty tired that Friday. I had only gotten maybe 4 hours of sleep. There was no way I was missing being there for this birth. He asked the usuall questions, how mom and baby were doing, such and such, and so on. Then he made a comment that has bugged me since. "You seem to have a special interest in this child. No way would I stay up until 2 in the morning for any child but mine." He said it in such a way that he was implying something, like maybe I was the childs father or something. Even one of the coworkers said something later about it. HE and I are having a meeting after lunch, would you mention it?
No, I wouldn't say anything. People who stick their foot in their mouth without thought as to other's feelings probably wouldn't care anyway even if you brought it up to them. The time to say something would have been immediately after his thoughtless comment - "She's my sister and recently lost her husband so yeah, I'm really trying to look out for her."
The time to say something would have been immediately after his thoughtless comment - "She's my sister and recently lost her husband so yeah, I'm really trying to look out for her."
I wanted to, and yes I probably should have then, but I just bit my tongue and went on about my work.
You should forget it. You don't know what he was or was not implying - maybe it was just tough to come up with something to say under the circumstances and what came out wasn't the best. I absolutely hate when people show me baby pictures, and if there is a big family story behind it like yours it's even more awkward - I would have had no idea what to say and would have been hard-pressed to say the right thing. I would actually suggest that perhaps you put him in an awkward situation by showing the pictures at length in the first place.
You should forget it. You don't know what he was or was not implying - maybe it was just tough to come up with something to say under the circumstances and what came out wasn't the best. I absolutely hate when people show me baby pictures, and if there is a big family story behind it like yours it's even more awkward - I would have had no idea what to say and would have been hard-pressed to say the right thing. I would actually suggest that perhaps you put him in an awkward situation by showing the pictures at length in the first place.
I think you're projecting your feelings. I would have absolutely no problem engaging a coworker about their child (but if the kid is funny-looking, my face might tell a story ), and I can't imagine most people having an issue. This seems like it would be one of the most neutral topics for the workplace. Babies and puppies.
Take it exactly as he stated it: He would not stay up that late for a niece/nephew but only for his own child. That is all. Nothing more, nothing less. It's odd that your mind would go to some incestuous story (even though adopted). This thought would never had crossed my mind if you never mentioned it.
It wasnt what he said, its HOW he said it, so I dont see how its odd thats what I thought. As far as showing him pics, he asked what I had been up to, I assume just being nice, so I told him about my niece being born, and just showed him a pic ot two I had on my phone., but I di understand how that is sometimes. Im just going to drop it and this post and say thanks to those who dont already think Im some kind of pervert.
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), and I can't imagine most people having an issue. This seems like it would be one of the most neutral topics for the workplace. Babies and puppies.
