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She didn't need to lie. She had me cold. I stood up to her last week and when she tried to cover her backside with some made up stuff I blew my temper and said a few unkind things. I immediately apologized in writing so there was plenty of evidence that it happened.
Today I had to meet with her and her supervisor so I could get a 'coaching' plan where my expectations were outlined. It was very professionally done, following the required format of our company. However, some of the things she cited as reasons for needing this plan were pure fiction. Not that I disagreed with her interpretation of something, but...they just never happened.
The boss seemed content with her version of things and didn't ask for mine. I am under contract to work with them for 3 more months, then I can move on. I am struggling with the concept that I should just suck this up and not tell him my side of the story. Or at least ask for documentation of the things that were made up.
The plan of action was actually kind of lame. Basically just don't do it again. Unfortunately, the work I do with her (only a portion of my responsibilities) is difficult and stressful for me. I don't think I'll lose my temper again, I rarely do that. If she is going to make stuff up, it may not matter what I do. I feel very helpless.
This incident will continue to eat away at you and stress you out, since you still have to work with this supervisor.
The fact that you said bad things back to her, and essentially had to have a form of counseling and an improvement plan, sounds ominous. Regardless of whether you were 'justified' or not, I'm not surprised they didn't want your version of events. They are always right.
That's how it works. It's always an uphill battle against management. I don't know your job history but if that happened to me I'd look for another job stat, especially knowing that I have a target on my back and knowing bosses can say anything they want to me and if I lose my temper, I'd already been counseled on the record.
You are there for three months. Suck it up and learn the lesson all this provided. Regardless of what she did (and we don't know BTW as you only told your side ) you behaved childishly. The manager obviously trusts her over you. How you behave in future is going to matter. Problem co-workers/bosses/managers always teach us more than those who don't challenge us.
Did you offer, start to speak -- and they cut you off?
Did you ASK if you could respond? enter response comments into your file?
Do you feel you were "contrite" enough for them?
No, I was advised (and I agreed) that I should let them run the coaching meeting as they wanted to and save my reservations for later. I didn't want to make any knee jerk reactions that would be construed as disrespectful or further evidence of my poor communication skills. They asked me if I had anything to add and I said, "Not at this time".
I didn't even mind being given a coaching plan for losing my stuff. To me, to reach that level of anxiety was proof positive that my stress level is way too high and I'm in the wrong position. I was misled about the parameters of the job. Our company actually advises against a person in my position to be given the responsibilities I've been given. I'm not even qualified to do these additional responsibilities. I just wanted to do the job as it was originally presented to me. There are a lot of things I LOVE about this job. But being stuck with a supervisor who repeatedly loses her temper, then pretends it didn't happen? Not healthy for me.
Tempers aren't a good thing to have in the workplace. At my last job, a worker and supervisor started screaming at each other. It was just hateful. The worker lost her job and nothing happened to the supervisor, of course.
Is there a deadline on that coaching plan? In most cases, it's just a paper trail for you to be fired at a scheduled date. There is no sucking it up to improve.
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) you behaved childishly. The manager obviously trusts her over you. How you behave in future is going to matter. Problem co-workers/bosses/managers always teach us more than those who don't challenge us.
