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On a related note, it is not just the fat shaming.
I eat a clean diet always, never cheat. I have to kind of hide what I am eating or I will continually get chastised:
"broccoli for BREAKFAST?!?!"
"spinach...AGAIN?!?!?"
And after many years of working together, everyone knows this about me, so they will make it a point to walk up in front of everyone and offer me a donut, piece of birthday cake, etc, so I can say "no thank you", and then continue to badger me to eat it "just this once" so I can continue to say no and people can smirk to one another
Not cool to fit shame either, and I assure you the fit shaming is way more "shameless" than the fat shaming is.
Those comments have no place in the workplace, period, regardless of whether someone can "take it" or not. It's called tact. Duh. I guess that's dying these days. I am never cozy enough with coworkers to make such personal comments about their weight. Additionally, I'd wager over 60% of the workforce in most firms I've worked at is overweight or obese. So is America.
No, those sorts of people have always been around. Forty years ago I was 20 and working in an office with a woman in her 50s. I had terrible acne that stayed with me into early adulthood. By that time I'd seen several dermatologists, had tried different medications, etc., but I still had bad skin. I'd gotten the usual "pizza face" ridicule throughout high school, and I had no confidence whatsoever.
This woman says to me, in front of everyone, "You know, if I were you I would forget about anything else and just concentrate on finding a way to get that skin cleared up." I stood there in the middle of the office in shock that someone actually said that to me and tried not to burst into tears. Then a man in the office said, "Yes, my son has a similar problem, though not as bad as yours."
If I were the person I am now instead of the person I was then, I would have responded harshly to such cruel remarks. Here were two older people, ostensibly mature adults, pointing out the ugly in a young woman's face in front of our coworkers.
As a side note, two decades later that man's son would die in the World Trade Center on 9/11, and I survived, and bizarrely, when I heard of his death, that whole conversation came flooding back. "Oh yeah, that was the kid whose skin wasn't as bad as mine."
Those comments have no place in the workplace, period, regardless of whether someone can "take it" or not. It's called tact. Duh. I guess that's dying these days. I am never cozy enough with coworkers to make such personal comments about their weight. Additionally, I'd wager over 60% of the workforce in most firms I've worked at is overweight or obese. So is America.
The stats on how many are overweight is really not the issue; and while comments about someone’s weight don’t belong in the workplace (or anywhere by strangers), it’s not something we are going to change either. Too many people don’t understand ‘tact’, minding their own business or keeping personal opinions to themselves (and it has gotten worse thanks to social media where it is acceptable, even encouraged, to ‘unload’ on strangers). The only constructive thing we can control is how we handle it - and usually that’s best by calmly addressing the person who made the comment and/or realizing the person’s comment says more about them than ‘you’.
On a related note, it is not just the fat shaming.
I eat a clean diet always, never cheat. I have to kind of hide what I am eating or I will continually get chastised:
"broccoli for BREAKFAST?!?!"
"spinach...AGAIN?!?!?"
And after many years of working together, everyone knows this about me, so they will make it a point to walk up in front of everyone and offer me a donut, piece of birthday cake, etc, so I can say "no thank you", and then continue to badger me to eat it "just this once" so I can continue to say no and people can smirk to one another
Not cool to fit shame either, and I assure you the fit shaming is way more "shameless" than the fat shaming is.
Seriously, "fit shaming?" I am tall and if someone jokes how is the weather up there? Is that tall shaming and I should be offended and rush to HR, file a formal complaint and fill out a "TPS report".
People razz each other. For me that was something that went on almost everywhere I worked. Your co-workers are probably envious that you have such amazing self control.
America needs to lighten up. Everything is not harassment. Every comment that is not filled with adulation does not need the word shaming added to it.
Last edited by Oklazona Bound; 04-12-2019 at 02:49 PM..
I'm a lean guy because I watch my food intake and exercise when I can at the gym.
People are always trying to make me feel like I am lucky to be naturally thin. I am not naturally thin and like I said I work at it.
They are always offering me snacks at work from the lunch room and announcing "Today we have cake" or something.
They say you are so lucky to be "so thin." I walk at least 30 minutes a day at lunch. They prefer to stuff their faces with free food and complain how much they weigh.
My wife is plump but not obese. She has had people make comments under their breath her whole career. One boss told the supervisor (a nasty woman) who then reported to my wife , "Mr. Smith told me all about the staff when I started. He said "Peggy" (my wife) is fat but not as fat as Nancy (who was a huge woman).
Peggy was very upset but then again she is now used to people thinking they can comment freely on a woman's appearance.
At another job she was a supervisor and as she made her rounds to see how her staff were progressing, one man muttered "FAT" under his breath at her. She glared at him and he just smirked.
What is WRONG with people? Fat=weak? Stupid? Ugly?
My wife is the most beautiful lady in the world with a good heart, a fine education, and lovely personality.
Seriously--someone's body is no one else's concern and fat shaming is one last taboo that needs to die. *Thin shaming, too*
What is WRONG with people? Fat=weak? Stupid? Ugly?
My wife is the most beautiful lady in the world with a good heart, a fine education, and lovely personality.
Seriously--someone's body is no one else's concern and fat shaming is one last taboo that needs to die. *Thin shaming, too*
I am sure your wife is a wonderful person and all. However people that are obese, smoke or do other things that harm their health raise insurance premiums for everyone else. So encouraging someone with poor health to improve it not only helps them but everyone else also.
So yes it is my concern. If we want to change the laws to where people in poor health need to pay their fair share of healthcare costs then I won't care what they do.
One of my co workers said I'm getting fat and she was like look at your behind..referring to my butt since I'm pear shaped and bottom heavy. I'm 5'3 and about 136 lbs. Used to be lighter but gained few pounds
Ofcourse I was offended by it. when she asked me for something I said no, you called me fat. Then she was like oh you look good. The extra pounds suits you. You're not fat.I will let it go for now but she makes those remarks again I will report her
Would they overlook this ? Comments like this are hurtful and my clothes already tells me I'm gaining weight and don't need her to point it out. Should I report her?
Just tell her that according to Queen, you are the type of girl that makes the Rockin' world go round!
SS
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