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I just got out of a VERY serious relationship (I sacrificed, compromised etc- the ex did as little as possible)
He moved from we lived here, to another state last year for a job- got let go from THAT job earlier this year. He is trying to look for another job HERE & there. He just ended it with me a month ago- after 6 years. We still talk because I do not want this ending (may be for the better I am thinking though!)
My question is this:
I got a letter (addressed to him- he uses MY address so it appears he is local- BY THE TIME I WOULD SEND IT TO HIM, THEN FOR HIM TO SEND IT TO THE COMPANY, IT WOULD BE TOO LATE- there is only a 5 day period in which to send it (the app) back- I am ALSO POA so OPENING his mail IS NOT THE ISSUE here- just to cut off THAT sticking point)
Again, he gets this letter from a place he was looking to get a job at. They are interested in another interview.
He has said EVERY DAY since I have known him! how much he cannot STAND this state, our weather, the people, the social climate, the employers etc etc.
I am thinking of NOT returning this letter (on his behalf) because HE WILL NOT BE HAPPY HERE! He has told me that....
I know A JOB- IS A JOB.. but you have not had to listen to him complaining every time he opens his mouth-job will satisify ONE issue he is dealing with, but can't cure ALL of his malcontent!
Plus he wants ME out of his life- so like he says "why come back?" My initial thought is NOT to send it because I feel I am doing him a favor. Plus he has said he will be happier there anyways, and the job market is better,people are friendlier....he has said this BEFORE he ended it with me too.
May be moved to the RELATIONSHIP forum, but you people know what it's like to not have a job so feedback is welcomed!
Thanks
Last edited by WhatAbout...; 07-13-2009 at 07:53 PM..
Reason: CLARIFICATION SHEESH!
It's his mail, forward it to him and let him decide what to do. You're not a couple, don't make decisions for him. If he wants the job, he'll take it, if not he won't. You don't have a dog in the fight.
Just because you have POA, you don't have a conservatorship. You do'nt have the right to make that decision for him, and knowingly not forwarding his mail could be considered malice. Take the high road and send it. If he ends up miserable, it's really not your problem.
BTW--On a personal note, he ended it, and it's a 99.99999% sure bet that the only reason he's keeping in contact still is the need for a "local address."
I would just forward the letter and let him make his own decisions from there. If the relationship is definitely over then I would consider moving on. If you feel like helping him with the local address then follow your heart and do so, but I wouldn't be expecting too much because he might just be using you just for that service.
Personally, I think relationships are weaker when you are too nice. Challenge him, act like you don't care (even if you love him bad)...limit communication, and then watch him chase you!!
It's time to detangle yourself from him. So, when it comes to those leftover connections, cut them off. That is, after you send that letter to him.
I could see this situation occurring (sort of) if you are still friends despite the breakup. But he doesn't sound like a good friend, just a complaining user.
I wouldn't advise you send the letter on FOR him/on his behalf to the company. Tell him you received the letter and then you could probably 'fax it to him if he's interested in the position so he can contact them himself. At the same time tell him nicely that he will have to change his address as you won't be accepting any more mail on his behalf. Good luck.
Write "Return to Sender - Not at this Address" on the envelope and drop it in the mailbox.
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