Paul Sunderland lecture, "Remembered Not Recalled" (infant)

[Green Irish Eyes]

It's nearly an hour in length, but I encourage everyone to watch Paul Sunderland's lecture, "Remembered Not Recalled." Undoubtedly, some here will dismiss it with a wave of the hand and a flippant "Not MY child! ", but there are innumerable adoptees who've watched it and said "This guy really GETS it!"

And, after all, who would be more knowledgeable about whether something is relevent to an adoptee's situation than, you know, an adoptee?

Paul Sunderland Lecture



.

[Artful Dodger]

Thank you so very much Green for posting the link. I had only seen a short video of it before - listened to it while doing chores. Highly recommend it - it isn't just about addiction - so much more.

[Avery_Harper]

Originally Posted by Green Irish Eyes

It's nearly an hour in length, but I encourage everyone to watch Paul Sunderland's lecture, "Remembered Not Recalled." Undoubtedly, some here will dismiss it with a wave of the hand and a flippant "Not MY child! ", but there are innumerable adoptees who've watched it and said "This guy really GETS it!"

And, after all, who would be more knowledgeable about whether something is relevent to an adoptee's situation than, you know, an adoptee?

Paul Sunderland Lecture



.

Thank you! Listening to it as I type. I'm an efficient multi-tasker.

[tiffjoy]

Thank you! I will listen tomorrow on the commute to work and post thoughts.

[thethreefoldme]

I came across this a while back. It was the first lecture I ever heard on developmental PTSD & it is very good. I hope this continues to be researched & that people stop refusing to believe adoption loss/trauma cannot exist for infants.

There is so much here to discuss that I don't know where to start. I'll come back to it in a bit!

What we're actually talking about is ADAPTION, not ADOPTION.

So true.

[thethreefoldme]

First here are the three main points of the lecture:

1. With adoption/relinquishment there is always a trauma (if not more than one trauma).
2. The trauma is remembered, but not recalled (because it's an implicit memory that is stored in the limbic system).
3. The trauma happens at the beginning of life, so unlike typical cases of PTSD, there is no pre-trauma personality.

[Scott_K]

Thanks for posted this! It should be required watching for anyone involved with adoption. Paul Sunderland really gets it. Nice to have one's own experiences acknowledged by a professional. Sure beats having it dismissed or ridiculed by an amateur.

"(Adoption) the only condition that really doesn't describe what happened."
"The relinquishment wound(s) ... can be seen as a post traumatic stress disorder..."
"There is no adoption without trauma, there is no relinquishment without trauma."
"For the adoptee, the issue of abandonment is life threatening. Can we imagine... is there a bigger trauma than being separated from your mother, the one person you need at the beginning of life ... I think not."
"There is NO pre-trauma personality"

And this gem:
"It's not so much what happens to you in life that throws you, it's actually how secure your beginnings are. It's a bit like the storm analogy. In a storm, the trees don't blow down just because the wind is strong. The ones that blow down blow down because the roots aren't strong enough to hold them up."

[susankate]

I'd love to be able to watch it. Unfortunately, I haven't had access to youtube for a while (don't have access at work). Do you know if there is a transcript somewhere of his talk?

[Green Irish Eyes]

Originally Posted by susankate

I'd love to be able to watch it. Unfortunately, I haven't had access to youtube for a while (don't have access at work). Do you know if there is a transcript somewhere of his talk?

The link I posted here isn't on YouTube -- it's hosted directly on the Life Works Community site. Are you able to access that?

[tiffjoy]

This was a fantastic talk!! I am discussing with my husband over dinner and will be urging him to listen to it.

I don't have time now, but I'll pop back over to share thoughts. I'd highly encourage every AP to listen to this. It was very informative.

Thanks for sharing, Green.