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I would have Airbus design a plan where certain sections of the plane were dedicated to people with longer legs (and wouldn't have to upgrade to Business/First class).
Fat passengers will pay for two seats - your fault you're fat.
People will actually be charged based on their weight anyway - weight on an aeroplane directly affects how much fuel it burns
High density seating throughout - no business class.
29" seat pitch. If you don't like that you can stand up chained to the cabin wall. We're a service taking you from A to B not a hotel or purveyors of comfort.
No food service, and especially no alcohol, its not our obligation to feed and water you. And it adds to the weight anyway.
Hand-baggage allowance of up to 8lbs per item. You don't need to clutter up our cabin with everything inc. the kitchen sink. That's when you pay to put it in the hold.
Toilet costs £5 ($8) to use - we don't serve drinks so you have no good reason to be going to the toilet.
No smoking.
No excess noise. Loud babies will be duct taped.
Seats are unreclinable.
No phones allowed, they will be collected at the entrance by a flight attendant and hidden in the galley, as they are anti-social and distract people from paying attention to safety briefing etc..
All our aircraft will be 30 years or older, because they are cheap to obtain.
+1. That would fix a lot of the more intolerable aspects of flying today.
My rules would be:
Everyone flies in one class and the ticket price would be $X all inclusive, based on destination, with one checked bag free. A crappy snack is included on all flights, and a lousy meal is included on flights lasting five hours or more. Fat people pay for two seats. Oh, and no airline miles, and definitely none of these complicated point systems that are designed to boggle even Stephen Hawking's mind: Platinum Class, Diamond Crown Winner, Prince Harry Point Section, etc. The parents of babies must purchase a separate seat for them so they can ride in a child safety seat. I don't know why babies are allowed to ride in their parents' laps on planes but not in cars.
Only ONE carry-on bag. I'm so tired of the people who try to pack everything they own into a bag that just barely fits in the overhead if you put it at the right angle and hold your mouth just right. I was behind a guy carrying what appeared to be 3 fishing poles on my last flight. One poor feller got hit in the head with it when it was being removed at the end of the flight.
I'd also add free Wi-Fi even on shorter flights. At least it would make the cramped flights go by a little faster.
It's annoying when the airlines put stuff inside the lockers and then you've less space!!!
Another rule should be that people have a set time to get on the plane. I hate it when people get on and stand up for ages putting stuff up there.. What are they doing!!! Sit down..
Also aswell sit where you are assigned. People on United seem to reshuffle a lot which slows down boarding.
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