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I've only seen $3 fees in nightclubs. Usually the fees are between $1 and $2. Then some banks offer packages where, for small monthly fee, you don't pay ATM fees at all, though it's probably only worth it if you draw cash a lot.
The advantage in Canada is that there are only 5 major banks, plus PC Financial which uses CIBC. If I go to Vancouver, I don't have to worry about using a non-home bank machine. This is not the case in the US which, of course, has some very large institutions, but even those don't operate in certain areas of the country. In sum, I really don't feel for people who get hosed with fees - it's the price of the convenience to use that TD machine instead of your home CIBC machine. It's not a necessity.