Caregivers, do you often feel like killing yourself? (adult, child, parent)
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I'm a caregiver for my mother, father and mother-in-law and "NO" I never feel this way, in fact I feel good at what I'm doing and will continue for as long as needed, they deserve it.
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Back in the summer of 1980 I felt like committing suicide, for over a month
but God Our Holy Father helped me to realize that if I did kill myself,
then I would go to HELL forever and forever and that would be far worse
then anything I had to deal with on earth.
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Is this sort of thinking useful for anyone? mod cut
Last edited by Sam I Am; 01-20-2014 at 07:37 PM..
Reason: unnecessary commentary
Is this sort of thinking useful for anyone? mod cut
yes actually that sort of thinking is helpful. Not the specific, but the help of the Lord to get you through the bad patches of life is certainly helpfulmod cut.
Who are you to judge anyone elses life?
Last edited by Sam I Am; 01-20-2014 at 07:37 PM..
Reason: orphaned - the post you refer to has been deleted
Anyone who's a caregiver for a spouse of family member, do you often feel like the only way to get of this horrible lifestyle is to kill yourself? Do you often feel that your loved one would probably fare better medically and financially if you weren't around?
I can honestly say that I felt like that sometimes. I felt like going into my little garage and starting the car and closing the door.
There was no one to help me! I had no siblings, no one to turn to. Almost all of my relatives lived in Europe.
There was no way to get any "relief", temporary or otherwise. We had no money and there was no way out.
I didn't have the physical or emotional strength to be a caregiver. Besides, I had to work, and my mother with Alzheimer's was left alone all day.
What was I going to live on if I quit my job to care for my mom? Welfare?
I told one person that I needed to get my mother into some kind of care. She told me I was selfish. How was I being selfish? At that point my mother was being left home alone all day. I had no idea what I was going to find when I got home every day. Would my mother be dead or alive? I dreaded it.
Sometimes I would go into the storeroom at work and sob from the stress.
I was always being told that no one would help me, that I was REQUIRED to take care of my mom. I figured that if I killed myself, the state would have to take over the care of my mom. They would have no choice.
Fortunately, I soon met my future husband and he helped me through the bureaucracy and now my mom is in a splendid nursing home! She is getting excellent care!
OP, please understand me. I know where you are coming from. But there are alternatives! There are ways to get the proper care for your loved one and free you from your burdens!
I have been caring for my husband for 18 years and he has no legs 5 strokes and can do nothing for himself. It has changed me into a person I do not know, a slave, there is no escape because all our savings have gone. Families disappear except to give you good news about their lives. I would kill myself except I do not want to ruin my sons life. A living hell.
Please anyone out there do not do this for longer than 5 years, I don't think I will ever recover, life in a care giving prison or life in a poverty prison, that is what it results in.
I have been caring for my husband for 18 years and he has no legs 5 strokes and can do nothing for himself. It has changed me into a person I do not know, a slave, there is no escape because all our savings have gone. Families disappear except to give you good news about their lives. I would kill myself except I do not want to ruin my sons life. A living hell.
Please anyone out there do not do this for longer than 5 years, I don't think I will ever recover, life in a care giving prison or life in a poverty prison, that is what it results in.
I'm terribly sorry for you and your husband. Is there anyone you can talk to?
I have been caring for my husband for 18 years and he has no legs 5 strokes and can do nothing for himself. It has changed me into a person I do not know, a slave, there is no escape because all our savings have gone. Families disappear except to give you good news about their lives. I would kill myself except I do not want to ruin my sons life. A living hell.
Please anyone out there do not do this for longer than 5 years, I don't think I will ever recover, life in a care giving prison or life in a poverty prison, that is what it results in.
I don't know if you have heard of a program called "Respite". Its operated through Aging Services in most counties. Respite will send someone to your home to care for your husband for a few hours at a time, so that you can get a break. If you contact them, they will tell you about it.
I realize this doesn't solve your problem. However, every little bit of assistance helps.
I don't know if you have heard of a program called "Respite". Its operated through Aging Services in most counties. Respite will send someone to your home to care for your husband for a few hours at a time, so that you can get a break. If you contact them, they will tell you about it.
I realize this doesn't solve your problem. However, every little bit of assistance helps.
I wish you the best. It is a hard row to hoe.
What I have had to do with my manipulative Mom is leave her at skilled nursing for as long as possible to give us a break and teach her unless she can comply this is what life is going to look like, depressing and bleak.
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