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I look and act normal. I am a single female and in my 20s and because I recently moved here and have no family I am often out and about by myself. Not always, but a majority of times. Sometimes I do go out with friends. I am wondering this : why does so many people in Columbia - no actually South Carolina in general - want to make direct eye contact with you ? Like when I am walking down the street and someone is looking at me and I look back at them like "what are you looking at" and they break into a huge grin and I feel weirded out ! Really I work at Ft Jackson and am surrounded by others all day, every day so sometimes I like being alone and ignoring others. Also when you enter a public place like a restaurant or some establishment I feel others staring at me, and Im just minding my own biz, it gets on my nerves and I wonder if they are smiling at me or laughing at me, but I dress and look normal so what is up with that ? Are they being rude and deliberatley invasive or just curious, but I am not really that funny looking, I swear . In fact I'm a totally averagey chick
Oh and I forgot to add that I am multi-racial and do have a distinctive look, but no more than many others, plus I have very 'sharp' features like slanted eyes, low bushy eyebrows, an angled face and a pointed chin and even my own friends tell me that sometimes I have a bitchy "look" about me, but its not the expression on my face / just the way my features are aligned that may make me look...not angry : but ok a little unapproachable but I never got stared at before I moved to Columbia, so dont really understand it. I guess the fact that I have that appearance plus not really a social person with strangers makes them stare maybe ? Like I said when I turn to see what they want they usually smile, but I dont know whats meant by that either so I quickly look away because I feel funny interacting with strangers for no reason. Sorry , just am unaccostomed to it. It happens on post as well as off.
lol, its guys AND women, of all ages, I mean everyone !
Plus if it was a guy and he paid me a compliment, then I *would* break out into a smile Yes, even me !
Out and about, I don't see this. In fact, it's quite the opposite. I'm the type that likes to look people in the eyes, even in passing, but most people divert their attention towards the ground or just try to pretend like I'm not there. Especially when I hold doors open for folks, they just walk right through without so much as a glance, nod, smile or thank you, like I was obligated to hold it open and allow them to pass through before me.
But it could be, like you, my appearance. I have a low, prominent brow so it looks like I'm always scowling or angry. I'm also a big feller (I'm constantly asked if I'm a professional football player or bodybuilder, and 2 weeks ago I had a state cop approach me to ask if I was an MMA fighter ;c) ) with a sometimes hefty beard, so that only enhances the projection of my appearance (which sometimes works to my advantage, like at Walmart...).
In restaurants, though, I do notice this. I think it may be more along the lines of people are bored with whats going on at their own table, so they start looking around/people-watching.
Out and about, I don't see this. In fact, it's quite the opposite. I'm the type that likes to look people in the eyes, even in passing, but most people divert their attention towards the ground or just try to pretend like I'm not there. Especially when I hold doors open for folks, they just walk right through without so much as a glance, nod, smile or thank you, like I was obligated to hold it open and allow them to pass through before me.
But it could be, like you, my appearance. I have a low, prominent brow so it looks like I'm always scowling or angry. I'm also a big feller (I'm constantly asked if I'm a professional football player or bodybuilder, and 2 weeks ago I had a state cop approach me to ask if I was an MMA fighter ;c) ) with a sometimes hefty beard, so that only enhances the projection of my appearance (which sometimes works to my advantage, like at Walmart...).
In restaurants, though, I do notice this. I think it may be more along the lines of people are bored with whats going on at their own table, so they start looking around/people-watching.
i had to laugh at the above; only as it's so easy for some people to pre-judge what i'll call "scruffy/burley/biker types". I remember first time we went in to the tattoo studio back home that did our work, and the owner looked just like the biker club friends that frequented the place. But he was not only heavily sought after for his work, but was the nicest person one could meet ( sit in their chairs for hours and you get to know someone pretty well). Point being i've tried to learn not to judge by appearance, whether a "big dude", some kid with the hat on sideways, or what have you. I wait until after i meet someone to make a determination.
Oh and I do somewhat enjoy people watching, but it's not out of some pre-determined feelings positive or negative towards someone.... and one should look others in the eye ( my .02 )
ayz_cor, that happens to me too. In fact, it goes beyond just stares...for example in stores, it continues by "Can I help you with anything?" "Are you finding everything you need" etc.etc.etc. I can be simply looking at a bin of potatoes and I am asked if I need anything. And I KNOW they don't do it to everyone because I actually did an experiemnt with a friend of mine - BUT he is a guy. So, in my opinion - the conclusion is - if you are a girl, you will be stared at and talked to even if you have the most unapproachable look (I've been told people can read my face really well).
I also experienced everybody constantly greeting me, saying Hi, how am I doing etc. I know southerners will say it's how it is in the south. I am just not used to it. In fact, I always feel strangely free when I travel up north because nobody stares or talks to me for no reason. I am a fairly private person so the strangers talking to me feels very intrusive. I am not much of a small talk person.
COme on people, it's the SOUTH! They'll will carry your groceries out at publix!!!! Are you really that surprised? ha!
Do they not normally carry your groceries out to the car at all supermarkets in SC? That is normal practice here in the Seattle area.
To the OP, I have been to Columbia twice with my bi-racial daughter who is 21. I did not see many interracial couples or biracial children at all, except when on Ft Jackson. Whenever we were out and about around Columbia, we got a lot of stares. I assumed most people were trying to figure out our relationship since we look nothing alike. Everyone was very friendly, but I did notice people staring a lot. I did not see much mixing of races at all when I was there. Seemed like mostly whites with whites, blacks with blacks etc. We are moving there soon and I really hope it is more integrated that what I've seen the times I've been there, as I couldn't really care less about the color of one's skin.
Do they not normally carry your groceries out to the car at all supermarkets in SC? That is normal practice here in the Seattle area.
Only noticed it at Publix. Never have I seen it anywhere else that I have lived. Been to seattle quite a bit but can't say i've ever loaded up groceries there. Beer maybe, groceries, not so much
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I work at Ft Jackson and am surrounded by others all day, every day so sometimes I like being alone and ignoring others. Also when you enter a public place like a restaurant or some establishment I feel others staring at me, and Im just minding my own biz, it gets on my nerves and I wonder if they are smiling at me or laughing at me, but I dress and look normal so what is up with that ? Are they being rude and deliberatley invasive or just curious, but I am not really that funny looking, I swear 
. In fact I'm a totally averagey chick 
Ps
Yes, even me !
