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I find myself arguing with "internet atheist" all the time, mostly because they have a narrow world-view and tend to but-in on any thread anywhere on the internet about religion, faith, spirituality etc. And no one minds of tries to stop them from derailing thread after thread. Whatever.
Racists are tolerated to a point by some, even when what they are REALLY saying is barely concealed.
And yet there is ONE opinion, that while perfectly legal to have, that no one can say anywhere, online or off, without being labelled insane, banned, shunned, and nearly sent to prison, even though it is legal, not sexist, racist, against anyone's religion etc. And that is the opinion that relationships and intimacy are JUST NOT WORTH IT.
There, I said it. I honestly do not think that it is worth it to go through so much to attract a mate, compromise myself for them over and over and go through all these hoops just to have someone to sleep in the same bed as I do. I do not see the benefit of going through all that just to have someone in my life I am expected to "open up to," (i.e., leave myself vulnerable to) when what little benefit I can get out of a relationship I can also get from masturbation and having regular, platonic friends.
Why is this such a taboo position to bring up? Why is this the one thing in society we are not allowed to question, whether out loud or, often, among others? I am not trolling or attacking any individual, just being honest here.
I have come to the conclusion that intimacy just isn't worth it...why is that such an outright evil thing to say or discuss?
It's only a problem when someone feels the need to unnecessarily emphasize how much they don't need something or tell someone how their want for a relationship is inferior in some way. If a person genuinely does not give two craps about something, why bring it up, let alone claim how much they don't need it?
It just makes that person seem like an obnoxious and bitter individual. If you don't want to be in a relationship, then whoop-tee I'm happy for you. I can assure you no one is really worried about it, if you opt out.
It's only a problem when someone feels the need to unnecessarily emphasize how much they don't need something or tell someone how their want for a relationship is inferior in some way. If a person genuinely does not give two craps about something, why bring it up, let alone claim how much they don't need it?
It just makes that person seem like an obnoxious and bitter individual. If you don't want to be in a relationship, then whoop-tee I'm happy for you. I can assure you no one is really worried about it, if you opt out.
Yep. Because there is no need for gay people to every talk about being gay in a society that is nearly 90% straight, or because atheists should never mention not believing in a God when surrounded by a large portion of people who are believers, or how disabled people should never bring up that they are disabled...
And it isn't like people with relationships don't constantly bombard us with films, music, books, ads, etc that tell us the only normal way to live is in a relationship, and it isn't like the mental health establishment ever believes that...
If you feel that way, victorianpunk, that's great for you. You have some valid points for sure. Personally, I think sex beats masturbation, but I totally get where you are coming from in wanting to avoid all of the bull****. People are probably going to attack you and mention points like, "Why argue or bring it up if you don't care about having a relationship?", but it is valid to discuss such a thing in our extremely sexualized society.
For many, life would be A LOT easier if they could avoid such pursuits. But the instinctual sex drive and need for companionship are strong urges to fight; few truly possess the ability to suppress them. If you are truly satiated by masturbation and platonic friendship, I salute you!
I find myself arguing with "internet atheist" all the time, mostly because they have a narrow world-view and tend to but-in on any thread anywhere on the internet about religion, faith, spirituality etc. And no one minds of tries to stop them from derailing thread after thread. Whatever.
Racists are tolerated to a point by some, even when what they are REALLY saying is barely concealed.
And yet there is ONE opinion, that while perfectly legal to have, that no one can say anywhere, online or off, without being labelled insane, banned, shunned, and nearly sent to prison, even though it is legal, not sexist, racist, against anyone's religion etc. And that is the opinion that relationships and intimacy are JUST NOT WORTH IT.
There, I said it. I honestly do not think that it is worth it to go through so much to attract a mate, compromise myself for them over and over and go through all these hoops just to have someone to sleep in the same bed as I do. I do not see the benefit of going through all that just to have someone in my life I am expected to "open up to," (i.e., leave myself vulnerable to) when what little benefit I can get out of a relationship I can also get from masturbation and having regular, platonic friends.
Why is this such a taboo position to bring up? Why is this the one thing in society we are not allowed to question, whether out loud or, often, among others? I am not trolling or attacking any individual, just being honest here.
I have come to the conclusion that intimacy just isn't worth it...why is that such an outright evil thing to say or discuss?
Am I the only one who has no idea what it is you are talking about? I have read the above several times and I am still scratching my head.
I have come to the conclusion that intimacy just isn't worth it...why is that such an outright evil thing to say or discuss?
Of course it's not an evil thing to say or discuss.
You might, however, run into better luck keeping a conversation going if you say something like "intimacy isn't worth it to me". Make it about your own personal view, not about trying to make some grand universal statement about relationships that you (and everyone else in the world) is not qualified to make.
Am I the only one who has no idea what it is you are talking about? I have read the above several times and I am still scratching my head.
I think he's upset because he and others want to spend their time in the intimate relationship section of C-D discussing how they don't want relationships, and no one wants to listen it there.
If you feel that way, victorianpunk, that's great for you. You have some valid points for sure. Personally, I think sex beats masturbation, but I totally get where you are coming from in wanting to avoid all of the bull****. People are probably going to attack you and mention points like, "Why argue or bring it up if you don't care about having a relationship?", but it is valid to discuss such a thing in our extremely sexualized society.
Exactly. Sex and relationships are EVERYWHERE in society. It is more prevalent than religion and society, at every level, just ASSUMES that everyone is either in a relationship or trying to find one and EVERYONE wants sex. And if you disagree, society seems to act as if there is something wrong with you.
You can't even question to pedestal that being in a couple has been put on by society.
I think he's upset because he and others want to spend their time in the intimate relationship section of C-D discussing how they don't want relationships, and no one wants to listen it there.
More like how it is illegal to even mention...but reddit/atheists are allowed to crash EVERY SINGLE THREAD on religion and nobody bats an eye.
Simply asking the question "is it really worth it and is there another option?" is taboo, no matter how polite the question is put...but "AHHH!!!! YOU DUMB RELIGIOUS PPEEEPLLE ARE DUMB!!!" is considered a perfectly valid reply to anyone bringing up the topic of spirituality.
And of course, it is not like anyone has ever had trouble talking to a therapist because they think there is something wrong with someone just because they don't want a relationship, and certainly no one has ever been outright interrogated by a parent for insisting they will never marry, have children of be in a relationship and it's not like society uses sex to push everything from soda to vacations.
The OP has also called mothers "cows" if that tells you anything about the mindset we're dealing with here.
Victorianpunk, you asked atheists why they post on a religion board when they're not interested in religion; I ask you the same thing: if you are so uninterested in sexual/marital/family relationships, why do you keep talking about them?
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