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My husband passed away in February of this year after 4 months in the hospital (mostly in ICU) and after a pretty up and down year before then. I've gone through what I feel is normal, ups and downs, some days better than others, still shocked still at times that my best friend is gone, wondering how to go on. But in a split second just cutting up with coworkers and stuff, just had this brief, truly happy moment which felt so good but so weird at the same time. Been sooooo long that I've felt like that it just surprised me. I think sometimes you are in your grief you don't even realize what it's like to feel "normal" or "happy" anymore but I felt it today - even just for a moment. . .
My husband passed away in February of this year after 4 months in the hospital (mostly in ICU) and after a pretty up and down year before then. I've gone through what I feel is normal, ups and downs, some days better than others, still shocked still at times that my best friend is gone, wondering how to go on. But in a split second just cutting up with coworkers and stuff, just had this brief, truly happy moment which felt so good but so weird at the same time. Been sooooo long that I've felt like that it just surprised me. I think sometimes you are in your grief you don't even realize what it's like to feel "normal" or "happy" anymore but I felt it today - even just for a moment. . .
It's wonderful, isn't it? It's such a relief to forget about yourself for a few minutes and truly enjoy something.
Even though you know it must be true since everybody says it, it's still surprising to find out for yourself that time does help, isn't it? I hope what you experienced is a sign of the start of this.
It's called acceptance. You go through a "storming" phase after a major life change (I.e. death) and as time passes, you develop a "norming" process. Things are becoming "normal", and you're adjusting to life without your husband. I think that you're realizing that he's in a better place now, free from any pain/suffering.
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