Got stuck in a shallow seacave....most embarrassing moment (symptoms, anxiety, deal)

[the city]

So, as the title says I got stuck in a shallow sea cave that had a strong tide. My friends and I were doing the male competetive thing and I couldn't climb back and didn't think of taking my shoes off to climb up, but not sure that would have help. Eventually I fell into the water and thank god I could stand. This one guy thought he could spread his legs out and try to reach for me and swing me over. I didn't trust this guy and I thought he would fall in too. Eventually my friend helped me crawl up back on to the rocks.

But I FEEL SO EMBARASSED. I think my friends don't care, but this hurt my pride. I have been trying to work out more and figure out why I am so skinny.

And then, not to be racist, but the Latinos were watching and I am like wth?

I was thinking I should have done something else cool that day, but I knew I had a better chance of getting out of.

But the real problem on hand is that I have this feeling of anything will ruin my reputation. And the other night my friend were talking about friendship and trust. And I have a real problem with friendships like always trying to make friendships work and push myself to go beyond. And my friend was like I shouldn't push or try over impress. He thinks I should let things natural and things people would say would be socially awekward were lying to me were wrong. Like silence is okay. And then sometimes meeting new people I am not sure what is socially awekward to say.

Anyways, I know this is alot. But yeah.

[marmom]

Originally Posted by the city

And the other night my friend were talking about friendship and trust. And I have a real problem with friendships like always trying to make friendships work and push myself to go beyond. And my friend was like I shouldn't push or try over impress. He thinks I should let things natural and things people would say would be socially awekward were lying to me were wrong. Like silence is okay.

Your friend is right. People who always have to come across as perfect / never making mistakes are annoying and fake. You are a human being, and you're not immune to mistakes....and you're not better at everything than everyone else! Where do you think you got the idea that you have to be perfect and better than everyone else? Or that mistakes are not okay? Once you can get past this you will feel much more relaxed, and your relationships will deepen and become more genuine and fulfilling. Good luck to you!

[Marlow]

You're certainly not the first person to have underestimated Mother Nature. I live on the Gulf Coast and sadly, people drown on the beach here every year because they don't realize the undertow is as strong as it is. Try to be glad that you learned a lesson about respecting the tides and forget about being embarrassed.

It sounds like you suffer from social anxiety. It's common and treatable. Start by googling the symptoms and see if it sounds like you. Then, look around your community for some treatment or support groups. Most likely it would not take more than a few sessions with a therapist to get some insight into why you feel awkward around people and to learn some techniques to deal with it.

Like I said, I'm used to swimming in the Gulf of Mexico, but when I was 20 I was on the West Coast and decided to swim in the Pacific. I completely miscalculated the waves and their patterns and in a few minutes was being tumbled head over heels under water and could not get up for air. Thank goodness a guy on the beach saw me and literally saved my life. By the time he dragged me in, my bathing suit was full of sand and after I sat on the beach for a few seconds I burst into tears. Yes, it was embarrassing, but I came to look at it as a valuable lesson. Hopefully you will too.