For those who want to move to new jersey (especially bergen county) from other states, dont bother (to rent, home)
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Alright, sorry for the long book that I am getting ready to write about why I cannot stand this state and will be heading back to California. This is definately the worst place I could have ever decided to move to. I moved here in 2007, for a fresh start and to get away from alot of things back home. At first, I thought it was an ok place, but once I started to actually get around and work and what not, I realize how ****ty this place really is especially to outsiders like myself.
Now before you guys go on bashing me, I am a nice guy, easy to get along with and have never had a problem making friends and keeping them or dating women, until I moved here. I must have made about 80 friends since I have been here, but almost all of them have come and gone. I get the "im busy" and "my girlfriend this or that", or just act plain weird towards me. Like one day we are friends and the next day they dont know me or just plain act shady. I have never been in such a state where everybody is about themselves. Almost everyone brags about themselves as if they were the ****. I just want to say, "get your nose out the air your not any better then anyone else." Why are people here like this? So unfriendly and shady?
And please dont get me started on the dating here. Im a good looking guy, and it is still tough for me. The women around here all think they are queens and are superior, even the fat ones. Trust me, I didnt meet 1 or 2 women, I met alot and 95% of the have that sense of entitlement. You cant even walk up and talk to one without getting some kind of attitude. And the games the jersey women play out here are also a new all time low. One minute she tells me she likes me and wants to get to know me, the next she doesnt know what she wants and when I back off, she likes me and wants to get to know me again. Everywhere you see a couple the guy is following the girl like a puppy dog, because he is afraid of losing her. The girls here know they have the advantage, seeing that there is like 10 guys to 1 girl. So they take advantage, because if she dumps him she can go out and find a rebound guy the same day. The guy doesnt have that luxury, and it will probably be awhile before he finds anything.Most of them cheat, lie, and play games anyway. You walk into a bar, there are 30 guys and like 10 girls, and 5 of them are there with bf and the others arent looking for anything lol. And they will be expecting alot of attention when so they arent exactly approachable.
And online dating doesnt work ( I have never been subjected to having to do that anywhere else). I was talking to a woman I met on a site we exchanged numbers and talked about meeting up after like 3 weeks of phone convo. She was a couple hours away. I told her I would drive to meet her, I got there and she didnt answer her phone. It was about 11pm, I didnt feel like driving so I slept in my car. Woke up drove back home the next morning and she calls me. And makes up a story about how she couldnt make it. Being the nice guy that I was, I drove out there again. And again, no answer. So I just drove back home and ignored her calls and messages. And decide that online dating wasnt for me either. So I was just alone for awhile. Having friends and there girlfriends rub it in my face constantly. Which was fine I dont mind being by myself. I havent meet any geniune people here anyway.
Its a hard life here, and I have talked to a few others that live here that moved from other places and they agree. You come here, everyone is in there own little worlds, there own little groups, and usually dont want an outsider to be apart of it. And thats fine with me I dont need to be around people alot anyway. And like I said the women are worst, they are as selfish as they come, constantly talking about themselves. You try to have a convo with one, all she will do is go on and on about herself. And no, women everywhere arent like this. Of course you have your bad apples everywhere, but when the bad outweighs the good, then you know you have a problem.
But thats enough about the friends and dating, the jobs here and the job security are the worst. I have had a total of 6 jobs for the 3 years I have been here. One job I was able to keep for a year, but he ended up letting me go because they couldnt afford me anymore. Another job I had for a month, let me go because the company was going out of business. My 3rd job, the guy let me go after 3 months because he was having a bad week and decided he couldnt afford me anymore. So I was fired/laid off. And so on. You mean to tell me for a place so expensive to simply even rent a room ( I pay 620 to rent a room),that I cant keep a job to stay alive? If the cost of living in this state wasnt so expensive, then it wouldnt be a big deal. But it is.
So there you have it, the people suck ( some are bipolar ), jobs suck, COL is terrible, dating scene sucks, and unless you like going to bars and clubs all the time, there isnt much to do here. Ill admit I have meet some nice people her, only a few though. Place is just full of rude, selfish attention whores. Not exactly worth my time anymore I gave this state all I had, I really tried, as I came here to start a new life. But this lifestyle here, chewed me up and spat me out. Not sure if its because im a minority in a jewish area. Ill be the first to admit it I cant handle this place. Isnt for everyone. So back to Cali I go. I will not miss this place one bit ( except for the food Itailan is the best ) Im still in my early 20s.I know ill have a bunch of negative comments, but I honestly dont care, as none of you know me personally nor have you gone through the experiences I have especially living here.
I hope you feel better as it sounds like you really needed to vent. No doubt its survival of the fittest out here and it sounds like you just couldn't measure up. Having moved here from San Diego myself over a decade ago I've had a much better experience. Met my wife, had a baby, have excelled in my career and made many dear friends.
Hopefully things will improve for you upon your return to Cali. Best of luck and hopefully no one on here will send you a bill for your online therapy session.
I hope you feel better as it sounds like you really needed to vent. No doubt its survival of the fittest out here and it sounds like you just couldn't measure up. Having moved here from San Diego myself over a decade ago I've had a much better experience. Met my wife, had a baby, have excelled in my career and made many dear friends.
Hopefully things will improve for you upon your return to Cali. Best of luck and hopefully no one on here will send you a bill for your online therapy session.
Hey man thanks your absolutely right, it just isnt for everyone. Especially someone young and no money. Im glad you were one of the lucky ones to come here and make things work. Cali and NJ are worlds apart. Just like someone from NJ moving to Cali, they would have a hard time. Good luck to you and your family, and yea I will need therapy after leaving here lol. Came sane, leaving insane.
btw, i dont believe in NJ "only the strong survive." its a normal enough place for anybody.
Alright even if it was me so what? What about the other people that moved here from other places or countries who feel like me? Are the not normal too? This is why NJ has such a negative rep. You trying to make me feel like im nuts or something because of what I have experience. Yeah, millions of people in NJ are right, im wrong.
Alright even if it was me so what? What about the other people that moved here from other places or countries who feel like me? Are the not normal too? This is why NJ has such a negative rep. You trying to make me feel like im nuts or something because of what I have experience. Yeah, millions of people in NJ are right, im wrong.
there are people that arent happy where they are living in every state and country on the planet. if you were so happy in california why did you move here to begin with?
its all "me, me, me, me" with you isnt it? how do you know you are good looking?
what does it mean that people are "shady"?
shady is a very cali term for people who you suspect of saying/acting one way to your face and then doing/saying something not in line with that as soon as you are gone. two-faced.
Can also mean someone who is acting in a way that leads you to believe they are up to no good.
there are people that arent happy where they are living in every state and country on the planet. if you were so happy in california why did you move here to begin with?
Wow. Im all about me me me huh? Like I said, you dont know me or anything about me. I give more then I receive, and I have given alot of things to people here in NJ including money and got burned. I mean whatever thats life. And how do I know im good looking? Because I am told, not that it matters im sure im a better looking guy that you are. But im not full of myself. If I was all about me, then I would be perfectly happy in NJ wouldnt I? Ill tell you what since you defend NJ so much and your the captin of this sorry place, tell me whats good about being here besides the fact that its your home?
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