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One of my nephews has chosen Facebook to announce to the world that he is Gay. All kinds of people have given him the thumbs up and congratulated him as a hero. Missing in the thumbs up and positive comments is my wife and I. Neither of us are proud that he came out as Gay, or wish to congratulate him for coming out on Facebook. (Actually we are sad because we know that even as America becomes more liberal about gay marriage that he is still going to face lots of discrimination and ridicule by others for the rest of his life.)
Now what he does with his lovers is his business and I am not against gay rights but why do I have to give him congratulations on a public Internet site? My brother (his father) has asked me why I don't congratulate him for coming out and was hurt that I did not. (I have not talked to my nephew who came out as gay via email, phone or any social media yet. I am still thinking about it.)
Would YOU congratulate a relative who came out on Facebook? (If you communicated with him on a regular basis on Facebook and face to face? )
PLEASE! This is not meant to be a discussion about the gay rights or gay marriage issue, but just about the pros and cons of congratulating someone who came out (as gay) on Facebook.
It is hard for a lot of people when they first come out, so every ounce of support can mean the difference between a road to a happy life or one of depression. Most of the gay people I know have strong support systems through family and friends and they are extremely happy people with successful lives. You should not be sad that he is gay, but happy that he can live as who he is. There are bigots out there everywhere, but if he encounters some and knows he can come home to a loving and supportive family, the bigots won't bother him as much. I say do it.
Why are you afraid of "liking" it anyway? Are you worried some of your friends will see you supporting a gay person?
You wouldn't really be congratulating him on being gay--he's always been gay. You'd be showing your support for him being able to live an honest and open life and letting him know that you're on his side.
As far as the Facebook aspect is concerned, it's not much different than wishing someone a "happy birthday" on their FB wall even though you may tell them that in person. It takes a second to click "like".
I will give a dissenting opinion on this. Don't give him a Facebook 'Like'.
Likes are meaningless and irrelevant. If you feel he's having a rough time, hug him. Tell him you love him and that you'll always be there for him.
Your feelings on his lifestyle are irrelevant, as are mine or anyone else's. Just love him like you always have and make sure he knows that you do love him and always will.
It's a click. If you don't like that he's gay, don't click. If you aren't upset or offended that he's gay, click.
Facebook likes are meaningless, sometimes a "polite" gesture that shouldn't be taken too seriously. But if these people are taking it seriously, and if you are not opposed to the nephew being gay, then click "Like." That "like" means something to them.
One of my nephews has chosen Facebook to announce to the world that he is Gay. All kinds of people have given him the thumbs up and congratulated him as a hero. Missing in the thumbs up and positive comments is my wife and I. Neither of us are proud that he came out as Gay, or wish to congratulate him for coming out on Facebook. (Actually we are sad because we know that even as America becomes more liberal about gay marriage that he is still going to face lots of discrimination and ridicule by others for the rest of his life.)
Now what he does with his lovers is his business and I am not against gay rights but why do I have to give him congratulations on a public Internet site? My brother (his father) has asked me why I don't congratulate him for coming out and was hurt that I did not. (I have not talked to my nephew who came out as gay via email, phone or any social media yet. I am still thinking about it.)
Would YOU congratulate a relative who came out on Facebook? (If you communicated with him on a regular basis on Facebook and face to face? )
PLEASE! This is not meant to be a discussion about the gay rights or gay marriage issue, but just about the pros and cons of congratulating someone who came out (as gay) on Facebook.
Do your nephew a favor and get out of his life. I mean it. He does not need your negativity. You apparently don't really love him anyway, or you would support his decision no matter what.
You wouldn't really be congratulating him on being gay--he's always been gay. You'd be showing your support for him being able to live an honest and open life and letting him know that you're on his side.
As far as the Facebook aspect is concerned, it's not much different than wishing someone a "happy birthday" on their FB wall even though you may tell them that in person. It takes a second to click "like".
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elvira310
It's a click. If you don't like that he's gay, don't click. If you aren't upset or offended that he's gay, click.
Facebook likes are meaningless, sometimes a "polite" gesture that shouldn't be taken too seriously. But if these people are taking it seriously, and if you are not opposed to the nephew being gay, then click "Like." That "like" means something to them.
I will give a dissenting opinion on this. Don't give him a Facebook 'Like'.
Likes are meaningless and irrelevant. If you feel he's having a rough time, hug him. Tell him you love him and that you'll always be there for him.
Your feelings on his lifestyle are irrelevant, as are mine or anyone else's. Just love him like you always have and make sure he knows that you do love him and always will.
Quote:
Originally Posted by elvira310
It's a click. If you don't like that he's gay, don't click. If you aren't upset or offended that he's gay, click.
Facebook likes are meaningless, sometimes a "polite" gesture that shouldn't be taken too seriously. But if these people are taking it seriously, and if you are not opposed to the nephew being gay, then click "Like." That "like" means something to them.
I think "likes" being meaningless is generational or based on personal usage. To the younger generation or even an older person who uses Facebook a lot, "likes" are probably important. Why post something if you don't want interaction or reaction from it? In this particular case, the user is sharing something of EXTREME importance and he will easily see who does and who does not support him by who does and who does not interact with the post. It says a lot if your own family is unwilling to do something as simple as "like" the post. If your own family is only willing to make a private gesture, what does that say about them?
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