Do You Put Up With People Who Cancel at the Last Minute? (spouse, member)
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How forgiving are you when it comes to people who cancel 15 minutes before you're supposed to meet them? Unless it's a really good excuse or our plans were super casual, I just write them off.
My favorite is when they cancel and want to immediately reschedule.
I'm patient until a pattern emerges. After that, I just don't make plans with those people or count on them for anything. I also take into consideration their circumstances. My sister has a special needs child and I understand when she changes plans but I don't count on her being there. If she is, great, if not I get it.
I'm patient until a pattern emerges. After that, I just don't make plans with those people or count on them for anything. I also take into consideration their circumstances. My sister has a special needs child and I understand when she changes plans but I still don't count on her being there. If she is, great, if not I get it.
It happens. We're in the age range where we have lots of friends with young children. We have a three year old ourselves. Sometimes you make plans, but then the kid is sick or some other legitimate reason comes up. We're actually supposed to go to a party to watch the Packers game this afternoon, but might not because our son was up with a fever last night. It happens.
I typically don't bother befriending people that are so flaky that they are constantly cancelling last minute, though. I'm well past the point in life where I need to deal with people who just can't pull their own lives together.
How forgiving are you when it comes to people who cancel 15 minutes before you're supposed to meet them? Unless it's a really good excuse or our plans were super casual, I just write them off.
My favorite is when they cancel and want to immediately reschedule.
One time thing or on going habit? Things happen from time to timr...I wouldn't write someone off just for that...but if it's a pattern that I happens all time there are plans. .then I would certainly stop making plans with them.
I'm patient until a pattern emerges. After that, I just don't make plans with those people or count on them for anything. I also take into consideration their circumstances. My sister has a special needs child and I understand when she changes plans but I don't count on her being there. If she is, great, if not I get it.
Yep, this. I had a friend that would always cancel last minute for reasons from "Something else came up with a friend," "I slept with a guy who had diseases and I have to go to the hospital" or wouldn't show up at all. She lives an hour away by driving, but 2 hours by bus. She always used to invite me over instead and like a fool, I would travel 2 hours each way to visit. It got costly and tiresome since I was doing the traveling and she rarely made any attempts. Given the way she talked about me after things happened, yeah... that's not a friend. I remember one time I was having a NFL party - (what's an NFL party? I'm a Packers fan living in the suburbs of Philadelphia. The friends I used to have around here - most were Cowboys fans, but I had one Eagles fan, one Steelers fans [he moved to California], a Browns fan [she's from Cleveland - we're actually still friends, met her in college since she moved here], and a few 49ers fans [they're my neighbors, still friends with them] - that was the year none of us liked who was in the Super Bowl... 2012 New York and Patriots... so I threw a NFL Party to celebrate our teams) - she only came because my dad picked her up to bring her here. For a Halloween party, she was a no show because she supposedly kept missing buses. That was lame too.
I get if it was an actual emergency or if they have some circumstances (like a special needs child or any child for that matter) that prevents them from things. I'm very sympathetic to that. It's just when a pattern emerges that someone would rather be with someone else, but tell you yes to a party and then they cancel when something better comes along. It annoys me with parties because money is spent on things. Hanging out to an extent, but it irks me with parties since money is involved for food, decorations, etc. Then again, I'm 25... so at the time I was having parties, I was 21-23... people were still young not to have kids and spouses. A lot of people would just cancel when something better came along.
I would count sick kids as a good excuse. Even then, it's often (not always) clear ahead of time that the illness is going to be an issue. If I can tell I'm starting to get sick, I start sending messages letting people know that I may not make whatever we have scheduled for two days from now.
The one who blew me off this morning told me that she thought she was supposed to meet someone yesterday, but it turns out it was today. Um, wouldn't you have figured that out *yesterday*? At least come up with a better excuse!
If it becomes a pattern I stop making plans. I remember one friend that would do this all the time, it drove me nuts. The last straw was when we had a play date set up for the kids. I was headed home and she called saying she was in front of my house but I wasn't there. I told her I was around the corner, see her in a sec.
She wasn't there, I called her and asked her where she was? (This was all within a minute). She blamed it on her son being tired and had to leave. This was probably the tenth time she had done it, so I was done with her.
If it becomes a pattern I stop making plans. I remember one friend that would do this all the time, it drove me nuts. The last straw was when we had a play date set up for the kids. I was headed home and she called saying she was in front of my house but I wasn't there. I told her I was around the corner, see her in a sec.
She wasn't there, I called her and asked her where she was? (This was all within a minute). She blamed it on her son being tired and had to leave. This was probably the tenth time she had done it, so I was done with her.
Do you think she was ever even there???
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