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The "clincher" is their age at the time since if they are minors the parent has authority to act on their behalf i.e. deposit checks in their name. And we do not know how the mother used the money. Perhaps it was used directly for the benefit of the kids.
They are in their middle 30s right now, the grandfather said that the checks were sent 4 or 5 years ago so they were not minors at that time.
He's assuming the checks were made out to them. They could have been made out to the mother. Unless there was yet another post I didn't see clarifying that the grandfather explicitly said they were made out to their names.
OR the grandfather cashed the policies and made out checks from his own account payable to the grandsons and mailed them to the mother.
Apparently there wasn't direct communication with the grandsons back then.
Or maybe the sons owe the mother way over 10K for something like a copay or car loan and she decided to get paid back.
OK, I guess the scenario needs clarification, but I thought the OP said the checks were made out to him and his brother. They were adults when the policies were cashed out.
From what my grandfather told me yesterday, him and my grandmother cashed out both insurance policies and sent checks that had our names on it, but somehow my mom managed to cash them. Roughy $9500 to be exact. How she cashed those checks? I may never know.
Quote:
Originally Posted by runswithscissors
Well....He said :
He's assuming the checks were made out to them. They could have been made out to the mother. Unless there was yet another post I didn't see clarifying that the grandfather explicitly said they were made out to their names.
OR the grandfather cashed the policies and made out checks from his own account payable to the grandsons and mailed them to the mother.
Apparently there wasn't direct communication with the grandsons back then.
Or maybe the sons owe the mother way over 10K for something like a copay or car loan and she decided to get paid back.
According to the OP, the grandfather said that the checks had their names (the OP & his brothers) on them.
The OP never mentioned that he or his brother owed their mother any money, but maybe that was the case.
From what my grandfather told me yesterday, him and my grandmother cashed out both insurance policies and sent checks that had our names on it, but somehow my mom managed to cash them. Roughy $9500 to be exact. How she cashed those checks? I may never know.
If your Grandfather is still alive he needs to confront his daughter. After all she deceived him first by not following his wishes.
But, ask him why he didn't simply give the checks to you and your brother since you are both in your 30's.
Something is very odd about this situation.
And, if your mom forged your names that is a crime.
According to the OP, the grandfather said that the checks had their names (the OP & his brothers) on them.
The OP never mentioned that he or his brother owed their mother any money, but maybe that was the case.
Considering the OP never actually saw the checks and 5 yr old memories tend to fade, we don't really know what happened. Checks can have your "name on them" in the memo line and that means nothing, it has to be on the Payable To line.
Considering the OP never actually saw the checks and 5 yr old memories tend to fade, we don't really know what happened. Checks can have your "name on them" in the memo line and that means nothing, it has to be on the Payable To line.
That occurred to me after I posted. Considering that the grandfather is elderly and fighting cancer it is possible that he may have gotten it confused.
1. Your grandparents bought those policies when you were kids and entrusted them with your mother. Their intent was to protect your mother from an unexpected expense, not your future spouses and kids. If your mother decides she no longer needs that protection then that's her decision.
2. You're an adult now. Time to provide for yourself and your family. Buy your own insurance policies and designate the beneficiaries as you deem fit.
Just saw the update. How old were you at the time the policy was cashed out and were you living at home?
3. Your brother already confronted her. That clearly solved nothing. What makes you think that you confronting her will do any better?
Just saw the update. At the time the policy was casehd out, how old were you and were you living at home?
Quote:
Originally Posted by oceangaia
The "clincher" is their age at the time since if they are minors the parent has authority to act on their behalf i.e. deposit checks in their name. And we do not know how the mother used the money. Perhaps it was used directly for the benefit of the kids.
Quote:
Originally Posted by oceangaia
Considering the OP never actually saw the checks and 5 yr old memories tend to fade, we don't really know what happened. Checks can have your "name on them" in the memo line and that means nothing, it has to be on the Payable To line.
You can parse it 1000 different ways (4500 even) but the OP's mother still sounds like a evil witch.
The insurance was likely taken out on the grandkids as a gift for their own children to ensure if they were faced with children's deaths the burden of the burial expenses would be relieved.
The insurance policies purchased for my three grandkids are for the grandkids -- not the parents -- unless a grandchild dies. Otherwise, the money goes to the grandchild at age 18.
So sorry about your cousin, horrific situation....condolences.
I'm not sure of the back story....But wouldn't that be insurance fraud if your Mom wasn't the insurance policy holder???
Not sure if it is insurance fraud or not. I know she was supposed to be the beneficiary in the event of our deaths, however, the policy was cashed out by the person that started the policy. I think legalities set in because the checks were in mine and my brothers names. My grandparents explicitly intend for us to get the money once the policy was cashed out.
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